**NEW** Starting Chemo March 2009

Thanks Michelle, I too have been undergoing tests- can you request a copy of the endoscopy results? Low iron can definately cause fatigue. I'm not sure if I have my iron tested or not. I am waiting on blood test results- was hoping for low thyroid (both my parents have- seemed likely)- those were normal. I did get a call from the doc today saying they'd got some more results- my serotonin is on the low side of normal and they suggested I take a supplement called 5-HTP.

Sometimes I feel like going in there and yelling: Find out what the hell is wrong with me!

I have never had a lot of energy and have been on antidepressants for 10 years- I think I have dysthymia- a low grade depression and low energy. I am off everything drug wise right now. I am tired of taking drugs that just treat the symptoms and don't address what the real problem is. I think whatever imbalance exists might have contributed to my getting bc in the first place. I have to admit I feel scared, I feel like if I don't figure out what it is, the cancer will come back eventually.

Hi,

Well ladies today is the second anniversary of my dreaded irregular mammogram.That's where all this nonsense started. Went out today to lunch at a restaurant right on a beach with friends and told them. They all said I look good and have almost moved on but unfortunately my two years have been filled with many complications. Just one more surgery to go..number nine..

Dayla..I agree one always has to be your own advocate . Too bad that you still feel tired. But you did such great things walking so many miles  ..maybe you have to look at it that way. Also I know you have a husband who loves you so much. I do hope you solve your problems. I do love your avatar.

Michelle..nice to hear from you again. Hope your endoscopy turned out fine. Can't you call the dr's .

Hugs.

Francine

Got the results back on my Xrays.  Seems I do not not have any arthritis.  "Why the xlsldifjsfksfkn am I in pain?"  Anyway, have decided to go off the Tamoxifen for 1 month to see if the pain is being caused by it.  Will follow-up with the rheumetologist in November.  I guess we are all still having some sort or other side effect from our cancer and treatments.  Hopefully, this to shall pass.

Have a great weekend all!!!  Taking daughter back to school tomorrow.

Michelle: Sorry you are having lots of fatigue and having low iron (anemia) will certainly nail a butt to the floor. I hope the iron helps. I understand your worry about cancer coming back ...but since you havd low iron before...it's probably just low iron. Damn cancer makes the alarm bells go off every time we don't feel good. Are you getting enough rest....hard to do with kids but necessary for your well being. I hope you feel better soon.

Dayla: I agree with Chris. They need to find the right drug to work for you and low serotonin levels are a good indicator of depression. There are so many antidepressants to try so keep trying and you'll find the right one for you. I am so sorry to hear that you feel scared that cancer may return...once again SFBC enters our minds at every turn. Hang in there and be persistent.

Francine: Wow it's hard to believe two years since your crazy cancer journey started. It's interesting that you told your friends and they think that since you look good (which you really do) they assume that everything is behind you in the cancer world. That's why I love coming to this board and having you ladies to talk to.....you all get it. I don't think it's ever totally behind us. I think about it less and less but the cancerversaries, mammoversaries ( I made that word up..lol)  are stark reminders. I am sending you big hugs of understanding and support.

Patti: I hope they get to the bottom of your pain. Tamoxifen is a bitch....it's known to cause joint and bone pain but it's a necessary evil (at least that's what I tell myself everyday) It will be interesting to see how you feel when you take a break from it. Keep us posted. What school are you taking your daughter back to? Is that your daughter in the pic....it's a beautiful photo!

Hugs

Beth P

 Hi ladies,

Dayla.. do wish I had something real helpful to say to you. But I do believe it is always good to express one's concerns , feelings and thoughts as you do to all of us. Maybe antidepressants would help get you back on your feet emotionally. But I  do believe  that being out of work and having too muchtime on one's hands can be depressing also.

Beth...as usual you write such wonderful things to all of us. What a gift to have you on this board. I am sure all of us princesses would agree..

Have a great weekend ladies..and when we are a little down just think about where we were last summer. A world apart.....

Hugs,

Francine

Hi All,

Wow.. So much going on with everyone.  First of all Michelle..  thanks so much for you comment about 'girls not peeing on the wall'..  I've been having an extremely lousy past few weeks and it gave me a much needed chuckle.  THANK YOU!

Dayla - I understand some of what you're feeling and I agree with Francine that one thing that may be emphasizing it is being at home and not working.  In any case, I'm pulling for you and hope you find a way to come out of it.  I go through periods like that.  Fortunately, they don't seem to last longer than a couple of weeks.  I find that the more I do, the less they bother me.  And in anwer to your question about bearing the heat? (posted LONG ago)  I can say that YES, it bothers me alot more now.  ugh...

Tanash - great news about the baby girl!  My prayers go out to you for everything to keep going well.

Beth - I saw your post about tamoxifen.  I hope you find some way to relieve the side affects you're experiencing.  My worst side affect so far has been pain in my knees..  very annoying, but bearable.  And I wonder if the tamoxifen is affecting my mood swings but I'm not sure because I've alway been pretty moody..  I attribute that to my disfunctional childhood and still being pathetically single (smile).

Patti - What a nice pic of you and your daughter.

Joanne -  I'm with you.  My hair's not growing fast enough either.  But yes, at least it's there.

Francine - nice pics of you and your granddaughter.  I'm glad you enjoyed your cruise and agree with Beth's comments about no one 'getting it' after the cancer is gone.  I don't lose sleep over it, but there's occassionally that little worry.

All - I hope you're all enjoying the end of Summer.  I'm so glad it's finally cooling off.  I mentioned that Carmine's has opened restaurant in DC and I went to check it out.  It was just as good in my opinion.  Everyone enjoyed their meal and the atmosphere.

 Take care and have a great day!

Beth

Moved my second oldest back into college apartment today.  It is always bittersweet!

Took youngest two out for ice cream.  Always makes me feel better 

Now heading to bed, kids at my school start back tomorrow....ready or not!!

Take care all...

Chris

I'm feeling okay- Thanks Francine.

 I get up and do things and get lightheaded, I have low BP. I bought some 5 HTP to start taking. I think I have a follow up with my PCP in a few weeks. I have an appt with new PS tomorrow to discuss stage 2/nipple TRAM revision. My LE is really flared up right now due to monthly cycle. Maybe that will help with the PS- appt as the assymmetry is more prounounced when I am swollen. But having more surgery also makes me worry if the LE will get worse- right now its really only a problem at this time of the month for a few days.

Dayla: Hope you are feeling better. Being in a "funk" isn't much fun for sure. You did such an amazing trek on your hike...even if you didn't finish it as much as you would have liked...I am so inspired by you. You did such a great accomplishment...focus on that. Being at home without the social activity that work provides as well as a lack of paycheques can be a bit daunting but I am sure you will get something going soon. You are a beacon of light so keep your chin up and try not to worry too much.

Francine: So true...we are all miles away from last summer. When is your surgery? Hope you are doing well. I loved Lord and Taylor...can't imagine how they improved on it.

Beth R: Tamoxifen SE's are still there but I've accepted it. Beats the alternative...lol! Are you going to get the effects of Hurricane Earl...fingers crossed!

Chris and Patti: Back to work with school eh and you both have kids away at school. Hope you had a good first week back

Rachel: Next week is your cancerversary...it does seem like so long ago! Glad you are feeling well and being grateful is wonderful. I am so happy that you and Damian are ding well. Ha Ha on the arse comment. I can sooooo realte. Let me know what the naturopath says...! I have several girls around my middle too...just want to get rid of them.

Love and Hugs to all

Beth P

Hi Ladies,

Rachel..Glad to hear that things are good between you and Damien. I do remember how upset you were last year. My what a difference a year makes to all of us.

Patti..Glad that you following doctors orders. Your weight loss regimen sounds great. Stick to it. A model in the fashion show..,Wow.

Beth..my surgery will be on September 22cd. I can't wait for the date to come. I really want to put all this behind me.  

My DH and I celebrated our 20th anniversary yesterday. We ate at a lovely restaurant in New Jersey facing the skyline of NYC.

I do think most of us will avoid Earl here in the NY area.

Have a great labor day weekend.

Hugs,

Francine

BethR..you are really quite funny.

Always enjoy your humor.

How are you feeling? Back to normal.

Hugs,

Francine

Sounds like things are still going well here.  Dayla, I second what Beth said:  the hiking you did do this year, while tired and feeling low, is a huge accomplishment.  But I completely understand the rest.  We sure are in the same boat. 

We were all in the car on Thursday, coming back from a day trip to Ocean City, and I mentioned that a mom from our board (Tanasha) found out she is having a baby girl.  I was mostly talking to my husband, but my 7-year-old piped up, "Aww, but boys are so much better than girls."  I turned and said, "But some people have to have girls.  Otherwise, who would you marry someday?"  And he thought for a moment, then said he would marry a girl dog.  Which of course prompted my older son to joke, "Same difference."  Nice.

Beth, I hope Earl misses Nova Scotia!

Michelle

Hi Ladies,

Beth..glad to hear that all are well In Halifax. My DH is a big weather fan and always monitors the track of storms going up the Atlantic.

My DH and I booked another cruise. This one is for our 20th anniversary. We are going on the Queen Mary 2 and it leaves NY on October 7th. It is a short one only five nights and stops in Halifax and Bar Harbor. Now we will see how the other half lives on board this ship.

Michelle..that is so cute what your young son said. It is nice to hear good news from all of us.

Oh yes my chemo curls have finally left me after one year. After my last haircut my hair is just wavy. I thought I was to have the curly hair forever. No complaints though..It has been a good summer ..

Enjoy this glorious cool weekend.

Hugs,

Francine

Rachael!  so happy that you are doing well, ayear ago was sooo hard on you!! Love Life!! Sorry I missed you in the last post!  Sorry I missed anyone!!!

Hi,

Dawn..wondered how you were doing? We hadn't heard from you in a while. Sooooooo glad you are well. Keep enjoying your life and family. Do visit us more often.

CC..glad to hear that Gavin has finished his chemo. We are all rooting for him.

Hugs,

Francine