You know you're a cancer patient when....

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  • NavyMom
    NavyMom Member Posts: 1,099
    edited August 2010

    Rolling On Floor Laughing My A$$ Off   That is ROFLMAO!

    Love this thread and read it everyday.

    Thanks to all who post here.

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  • kittycat
    kittycat Member Posts: 2,144
    edited August 2010

    Designermom - I've now moved onto "Intervention" and Crime TV shows!  I couldn't watch the food channel when I had bad chemo days.  I have to tape the haunted stuff.

    Earlier today I was trying to think of the liquor my dad used to drink. I could picture the logo and "Old Number 7" but couldn't think of the words "Jack Daniels" 

    When you're bored and google haunted places in your town (and drive by them & freak out your husband).  LOL!

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  • Ca1Ripken
    Ca1Ripken Member Posts: 1,254
    edited August 2010

    You know you are a cancer patient, when you fall UP the stairs AGAIN, because you can't feel your toes...  when will I learn?? 

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  • justpayton1
    justpayton1 Member Posts: 786
    edited August 2010

    when it takes all your energy to stand in the shower..

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  • squidwitch42
    squidwitch42 Member Posts: 2,228
    edited August 2010

    When your bed becomes your home, complete with:

    pill box, snacks, juices balanced on bed frame armrest, remote, phone, emergency phone numbers, computer, your dog, more snacks (maybe that's why my dog is there?)

    just missing a bathroom...

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  • jteach
    jteach Member Posts: 199
    edited August 2010
    As you are getting dressed you become distracted by your daughter asking you a question through the door and you put on a second pair of panties. Surprised
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  • amlg1
    amlg1 Member Posts: 596
    edited August 2010

    When you used to be such a patient and sweet person,and you have now turned into such a BIATCH:)

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  • Leah_S
    Leah_S Member Posts: 8,458
    edited August 2010

    and you NEED that second pair of panties.

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  • jteach
    jteach Member Posts: 199
    edited August 2010
    When you can't wait to show your oncologist your newly aquired DIEP cleavage.  Interestingly, I know my husband would love it, my oncologist will love it and I'll bet he goes home at night and says, "Hey, honey, a woman showed me her new boobs today." And his wife will smile and say,  "Oh, I'm so happy for her.  Who did them?  Are they nice?"Money mouth This could only happen in "our" world!
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  • jteach
    jteach Member Posts: 199
    edited August 2010

    Leah, HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

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  • KittyDog
    KittyDog Member Posts: 1,079
    edited August 2010

    When you go to put your nightgown on and didn't  realized you were already wearing your nightgown and only realized it when you saw your reflection in the mirror as the nightgown was coming off your head.

    Will chemo brain every go away?

    When you show up at the wrong Dr.'s building. 

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  • jenn3
    jenn3 Member Posts: 3,316
    edited August 2010

    OMG - I went out of town for a few days, decided to take a computer break and missed sooooo much....still LMAO!!!!

    you have so many empty pill containers you seriously consider calling the pharmacy to discuss recyling..............

    your new curly thick hair becomes and amusement to friends and family........at the end of the day  when they know I don't have to go out of the house, they ask me to fluff it up, please fluff it up and you can fluff it up so high that your hair its the lights on a ceiling fan. 

    eight months after chemo and you still can't touch hot water............hmmm does that mean you can't do the dishes?

    I think as a group we should talk to a publisher about putting this together.  This is hysterical and while people may not "get it", we sure do.  Laughing is much better than crying. 

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  • kittycat
    kittycat Member Posts: 2,144
    edited August 2010

    When your new favorite actvity is sleeping - ALL DAY!!!

    Ok, my TV watching has moved onto Whale Wars.  Interesting show.

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  • AussieSheila
    AussieSheila Member Posts: 647
    edited August 2010

    ...............and you prefer to sleep anywhere but your own bed like on the lounge, head down at the dining room table, computer chair, even the toilet, 'cause it's a bit scary when thoughts like, 'this ceiling might be the last thing my eyes ever see,' invade your head.  I figure that's because you can't see the ceiling from most of those positions

     Sheila.

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  • Firni
    Firni Member Posts: 1,519
    edited August 2010

    I never thought about why it's easier to sleep everywhere except in bed.  You might be right Sheila.

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  • Susie123
    Susie123 Member Posts: 804
    edited August 2010
    When thanks to Arimidex and the excessive sweating that comes with it....you stand up at Church for the closing prayer, you feel something inappropriate on your back side, and can't tell if it's just your underwear that's stuck to your but cheek and crack, or if it's your dress stuck in there! Embarassed
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  • NativeMainer
    NativeMainer Member Posts: 10,462
    edited August 2010

    Suzie--not very funny when it happens, and how do you discreetly check and fix the problem?????  Ah , the embarassments of bc treatment. . .

    Sheila--I think you may have hit on an as yet unrecognized aspect of the bc experience.  I wonder if there is could be a treatment fot this kind of thing?   Maybe painting a mural on the celiing?  Or putting up posters?  Rearranging the bedroom?  Better sleeping drugs?  Sleeping in the guest room?  Ah, who knows.  Whatever works, I suppose.  

    Does anyone else have to have a radio or TV on in order to sleep?  I used to love the quietness of my rural home for sleeping at night, now I can't sleep without the radio on.  Not sure how that works, but there it is.  An odd side effect of arimidex, maybe?  or menopause?  

    You know you're a cancer patient when you break out in a cold sweat every time you drive past the highway exit you used to take to go to radiation treatment every day for 8 weeks.  

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  • Susie123
    Susie123 Member Posts: 804
    edited August 2010

    I do sleep with the TV on now, and I use the term "sleep" very loosely, start out in the bed, but end up elsewhere. I do think it's the arimidex and the menopause X2 that it causes.

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  • KittyDog
    KittyDog Member Posts: 1,079
    edited August 2010

    I have to have a fan on.  I started that a few years back because of menopause but had stopped using the fan during the winter months.  During chemo I started back and would just turn it so it didn't hit me...froze during chemo.  Now I like the fan on again...thank you Tamoxifen.

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  • KittyDog
    KittyDog Member Posts: 1,079
    edited August 2010

    You know you are a cancer patient when your 7 year old gladly tells the waitress as Pizza Hut that my mommy had cancer and they cut her boob off.  Yes she did this yesterday.  She also did it with her Daddy a few weeks back to the cashier at a local restraunt.  I thought our talk had worked.

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  • Jaimieh
    Jaimieh Member Posts: 2,373
    edited August 2010

    When your 4 year old son comes up to you and in while giggling says "I touched your boobie in the bathroom" and you just chuckle at him....

    When your 7 year old daughter comes down with your prostetics in her shirt and you just laugh and tell her to put them back in the box......

    Or when you loose your wig......or loose your prostetics.....I have done both and thought it was hilarious....lol....

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  • Adey
    Adey Member Posts: 3,610
    edited August 2010

    All-

    Lurking, love it, can only relate to some as I've had bmx but no further treatment yet.  Thanks for the laughs.

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  • AussieSheila
    AussieSheila Member Posts: 647
    edited August 2010

    NativeM, I only go into my bedroom now when it is totally dark and never switch the overhead light on unless I am staying upright and exiting fairly quickly.  I only use a battery operated L.E.D light for reading by because it only reaches to, and focusses on, the page I am reading at the time.

    I know it's a bit silly of me, wasting all this time avoiding the room, because I will probably not die there anyway. I  just can't shake the thought of it.

    Sheila.

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  • jenn3
    jenn3 Member Posts: 3,316
    edited August 2010

    when you and your best friend are already thinking of how to use the foobs as part of a Mardi Gras costume (after they're no longer needed of course)......................

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  • lorrhaw
    lorrhaw Member Posts: 751
    edited August 2010

    You know you're a cancer patient when you always choose dark pants for road trips because you never quite know what will happen while on the road, not sure if it is the tamoxifen but bladder issues are worse than ever.

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  • justpayton1
    justpayton1 Member Posts: 786
    edited August 2010

    I sleep w/ the t.v on and  2 fans :)  a ceiling fan and 1 sits on top of my nightstand blowing directly on me. ( chemopause)

    you know your a cancer patient when...while weeding your foob falls out of your shirt

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  • cs34
    cs34 Member Posts: 253
    edited August 2010
    ...the tech giving you a thyroid ultra sound says to you, "Let me know if I'm hurting you," and you "belly" laugh and say to her, "Oh honey...if you only knew..."
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  • changes
    changes Member Posts: 622
    edited August 2010

    When 6 months ago you did not even have Ibuprofen in your medicine chest, and now it's better stocked that a Walgreen's pharmacy.

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  • dutchgirl6
    dutchgirl6 Member Posts: 673
    edited August 2010
    ...when you had to eat a burned sandwich for lunch because you knew you had enough time to check this board before it was finished toasting in the oven and you got sidetracked...and it doesn't matter because you have no tastebuds anyway
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  • Ca1Ripken
    Ca1Ripken Member Posts: 1,254
    edited August 2010

    You know you are a cancer patient when you go to a pretty big pharmacy, hand them all your scripts... and they don't have one of the drugs ordered for you and say it will take them a day or two to get it!  (Emend... I had to go to a bigger pharmacy!)

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