**NEW** Starting Chemo March 2009

Rachel,

I, too, am sorry about your loss.  I have a miscarriage after my second son and it was devistating.  I know now that it was for the best...something wasn't right and would never get better.

This pregnancy had you very nervous from the start....next time you will be able to enjoy it without and apprehension or anxiety.  My heart goes out to you during this difficult time.

Hugs,

Chris

Hi all - So many pages to read, it has been a long time since I have been on this site.  Working at a school I am now off for the summer.  Yippee!  Work was exhausting me - all day on the computer, so didn't want to see a computer when not at work. 

So much I have read, happiness, sadness, life changes for many.

Beth P - I too have many aches and pains, hip, feet, aches in the chest/breast area from radiation.  BS says it could possible be arthritis related.  Had a bone scan in March, that came back negative for cancer.  Did find out that when I fell on the steps last August I did fracture 2 ribs.  So that explains the pain in my right back rib cage.  I also have slight pain in my from rib cage under my breast area.  Definitely bring all these things up to onc and PC doc at appts in mid July with each of them.  I also have what I'm thinking is Tennis elbow.  This started in the winter when I was doing some indoor training for dragonboating.  The Tonic water definitely works for the leg cramps, it is the quinine and my NP had recommended a 1/2 glass every night before bed.  The Chemo/Tamoxifen induced menopause has given me many hot flashes that are probably the reason I wake up so much during the night.  I am doing a trial for BC survivors that have Hot Flashes and Univ of PA where my BC docs are.  The Dr. heading the trial is a FP and also does accupunture.  The trial is to see if accupunture helps with hot flashes.  Four scenarios: Real accupunture, fake accupuncture, gabapentin (a drug also called neurontin), or placebo gabapentin.  I was randomly chosen for the gabapentin or placebo drug trial.  Just started taking the Drug/placebo on Wednesday, starting on 1/day gradually increasing by next week to 3/day.  I did want the accupuncture, but maybe I am on the real drug and it may work for my flashes.

Have a great 4th and/or weekend.  So great to "catch up" on all the news.

Rachel: I am sorry that things didn't work out the way you hoped. There are no other words that I can say to ease your sorrow. Take your time to absorb the news and allow yourself to grieve. Even though you may have somewhat suspected this may happen I'm sure it is really difficult. I wish you well and send hugs.

Francine: Glad you enjoyed your camp. Sounds fun. Enjoy the play tonight. I saw Menopause Out Loud last week...very funny and boy...I could sure realte!

Patti: nice to hear from you. How is the Dragon boating? Thanks for the Tonic Water tip. I'll give it a try.

Beth R: Enjoy the beach.

Big Hugs to all

Beth P  

Have a wonderful time. Looking forward to hearing all about it when you get back.

Hugs

Beth

Enjoy your weekend Francine and may last summer be a blurry blip in your memory.

Happy 4th of July to all my American friends. It's Canada Day here tomorrow so we will be celebrating too!

Hugs

Beth P

 Hello all,

Thank you for your lovely words. A week on and I feel calmer, though still very sad. I am really glad I had not told many people of the pregnancy. Physically the effects of the miscarriage are now all but gone. I have not had much of a chance to do any active grieving because of this wretched criminal trial taking up all of my life (18 hour days most days since it happened) - the jury is now out considering its verdict and i hope they will decide before the weekend (it is Friday morning here in very chilly Melbourne).

Patti and Beth P - tonic water tastes even better with Tanqueray gin and a slice of lime! 

Happy Canada Day and or Happy 4th of July Day to all of you, and best wishes to those travelling in foreign  parts (Japan is so wonderful, Dawn!)

Dawn: Sounds like a marvellous trip. Have a great time and post some pics when you get back!

Hugs

Beth P

Hi Beth..just heard that the Queen is coming to NYC. She will visit ground zero and then go to the UN.

hugs,

Francine

Hello All!  I thought I was keeping up with everything by seeing you on fb, but apparently we share much more here.  Rachel, I just read your whole story and I'm sad it didn't work out that time.  Janine, I hope you and your dh are just having a rough patch, but if you're both miserable, then a separation might be wise.  Beth, how is everything with Nikita in Europe?  Is she having a blast?  Bwbly, I'm so sorry about your husband and dog   And Tanasha, I'm sorry your mom has to go through this.  Beth R., it sounds like you're recovering from surgery very nicely!  And Francine, you just look and sound fantastic!  Rikki, I'm so thrilled that your sister is still with us!  Overall, I'm glad we're all doing great

Things are so much better here than last year, I wish I could've just had a peek last year so I'd not have been so depressed.  My daughter Allison, despite the fact that she's completely beat up her taller brother twice in the past two weeks, is doing well.  I (and I say I because dh was not thrilled with the idea) got her a kitten on Friday, and now I've fallen in love with it.  He's so cute. 

My son Jason had his bar mitzvah last month.  I did a lot of work on it by myself, and it was practically a full-time job for at least a month.  Jason is very funny, and the rabbi appreciates him, so between the two of them we ended up with a service that was casual and funny, while still being beautiful and serious.  Best bar/bat mitzvah service I've ever attended.  Everyone tells me the party was fun, but to me it seemed to pass in seconds and I don't have much recollection of it now. 

My little one, Jonah, is doing great.  I thought I should mention that because I wrote about Allison and Jason!

I have to get the Vitamin D test and an MRI, and I've been putting it off for nearly three months.  I take the tamoxifen everyday, and I constantly feel tired.  Memory not great.  I have a huge interview tomorrow (3rd grade in my home district), and I've put in a lot of prep time.  But I'm worried, because before all of this if I got an interview I could get a job.  Since starting tamoxifen I've had three interviews without getting a job.  I'm afraid they're noticing something about my energy level being off, even though I'm trying to fake it.  I'm also not thinking as quickly as before.  Hopefully all the preparation will make up for that.

I keep thinking about the trip to NYC.  It was so much fun!  This weekend we're headed down to North Carolina to drop Allison off at the UNC band camp.  I wanted it to be a family thing, but now I'm hesitant about that.  My dh's Crohn's Disease, which was in remission for 25 years, has returned.  He's not feeling well most of the time, and I'm worried about dragging him so far.  I might just take two or three kids and let him stay home with the kitten and the dogs.

And that's all.  I always forget that I only need one carriage return between paragraphs here.

Michelle

Hi all!

Just stopping by for a visit, nothing out of the ordinary is happening at the moment (which is a good thing!)

Michelle - great to see you! I see ya on FB now and again, and always smile. I love seeing you all posting on my FB feed. Good luck with your job search.

My thoughts go out to all on the NE coast, the heat must be really miserable for you all. You have actually  been hotter than we have here in Texas (unheard of!), but we are used to it and have A/C everywhere. I cannot imagine how you are all dealing with it.

 Dawn - Japan sounds like a blast, can't wait to see pics.

General hello and good wishes to Rachel and the Beths, hope you are well, and hope everyone else is enjoying their summers as well. Hugs!

Hey Ladies!! greetings from Tokyo!  We arehaving a blast!!! Rained today we were on a tour of Mt Fuji and Hakone Springs, went down by bus and took the bullet train back!! The weather was terrible the trip was wonderful!!!!thanks for all of the good wishes, we head home Sunday to my newly painted house, inside and out!! I'll have alot to do, my husband is heading to China so it will be on me!! sounds like everyone is doing well and enjoying the summer.   Take care!!

Tanasha!!

Congratulations and the best of luck!  You'll be in my prayers!

 Beth

Hi,

Tanasha..so happy for you.A great surprise for you and a real peasant one.

BethR..Sounds like you are doing great. Are you back to work yet.

Dawn..So happy you are having such a grand time in japan.

BethP..Just wrote you a long message here and then it dissappeared. No new monitor yet and still working on this frustrating netbook.July Fourth party was enjoyed by my 25 friends but was stressful for me. The day after I had six friends and tomorrow another small BBQ. But as a friend said last year I was so sick that I couldn't do anything with latflap surgery and MRSA virus be thankful for all the hard work I can do this yeqar. So so true.

Beth sounds like your daughter is having a blast on her tour. Vancouver sounds like a nice place to spend five days. Pretty city. It appears they accepted my letter to the editor as they called to confirm but they put it in the paper whenever they feel like it.

Hugs to all my dear princesses.Have a great weekend all

Francine

Congrats Christy! You look fantastic. How is your nephew? Keeping him in my prayers. Have a great weekend and celebtate PFC....yeah!

Hi Ladies,

Christy..thanks for keeping us informed.

Bethp..So this Friday is youir exchange. I believe they will give you an implant and lift your other breast.too/ That all should go well. How nice you are nearing the end of your journey.

Ny third BBQ yesterday went over well. Depite the prediction of heavy showers it never rained.

Tomorrow I go with the ladies for restaurant week in Manhattan.Should be fun.

Hugs,

Francine