Please, help me understand
Comments
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Would someone be kind enough to tell me about Hospice and when is the proper time for us to request that these angels enter our lives? Do we go and stay in a Hospice of do they come to us? Forgive me my ignorance but I fear being alone at the end.
Sandy
(This is my 1rst post)
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sandy, my heart goes out to you. the nurses at your oncology clinic would be your best resourse for the answer to your question specific to the area in which you live, as there can be some variation depending on the part of the country. hopice is staffed with angels in my opinion. but there are regulations, and you can either talk to your doc, or the nurses, whichever is more comfortable for you. they will help you through the process. the more information you get and the sooner, the easier the process should be for you. good luck & bless you.
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The proper time is when someone is willing to stop aggressive treatment. While there are some exceptions, normally on Hospice you only receive care for your comfort such as pain medication. I know people who went on Hospice, got stronger and went off so they could have surgery or chemo, so it's not an irreversible decision. The doctor normally has to sign that the life expectancy is six months or less.
Some areas have hospice centers and some insurance companies will cover stays there. In other cases, hospice comes to the home to monitor the patient and adminster medication. You can get information at http://www.hospicenet.org .
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I'm so sorry to hear you are considering hospice care. My father is in hospice care at this time for prostate cancer. For a loved one to be admitted to hospice they need to be willing to stop aggressive care for their diease. The person will live with the care giver. That person can be the spouse, or another family member. In my case I am the care giver. Hospice will send in a group of people to assess the needs of the patient as well as what the care giver feels they need for support. In my case my dad has a CNA come 3 times a week for bathing, a nurse 1 time a week, and any others as needed.
Next week I go in for breast cancer surgery, so they will provide daily care for 3 days and more if needed. I could not keep dad with me without these angels. If you have any questions please ask. I have so much info, and can always get questions answered by one of their helpers.
Karen
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You absolutely can and should speak with hospice before ending aggressive treatment. Some will get involved earlier and you will not have to end treatment to take advantage of their care (which in my experience with my mother is FAR more caring than typical medical care). Precisely because you are uncertain about hospice, you can talk to them yourself now, and learn what they can do and when. I think its best to speak with hospice earlier rather than later. With my mother, we waited, I believe, too long and missed out on some things hospice could have done for her.
Also, Kira was referring to home hospice and that is one option but where I live (and in most places) there are in-house hospice centers where you can live, especially if you don't have a caregiver. These facilities are, again, much more comforting than a hospital and if you are there you will receive everything you need.
Oncology nurses are one great resource. At the hospital where my mom was treated for brain cnacer, there was a professional on staff whose responsibilities involved counseling families about hospice. When I made that decision for my mother it was after I spoke with this person about which hospice would best suit her needs.
I am sorry that you are dealing with these issues but there are resources out there that can be a great help.
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Dear Sandy,
The ladies above have provided great information and have covered the basics. I wanted to share my experience with hospice.
My mom also had stage IV breast cancer, but had no evidence of disease. After diagnosis in 2002, she had metal placed in her spine to stabilize it and keep her from becoming paralyzed. For some reason, the metal started to push its way out of her skin. That wound and a leg ulcer from circulation problems both became infected with MRSA (resistant staph) and my mom was in so much pain. We had taken her to the hospital and they barely did anything for her pain. The next morning, my husband took her to the oncologist to try to figure out why she was hurting so much. There was a nurse who had just switched from hospice to oncology who talked to my mom and husband about it. She decided to have hospice for the convenience of having a nurse come to our home (she lived with us). The nurses were amazing. My mom could be with us, but got the convenience of a hospital bed (to help get up and down), and her pain increased exponentially and the nurses were there within an hour at every call. They got her pain under control and took wonderful care of her.
I hope that's not too much information, but I wanted you to know how it helped my mom, and my husband and myself. They truly are angels.
Peace and hugs to you and may God bless you on this journey....
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