June 2010 Rads

Checking in - went for my first treatment today.  In and out in no more than 15 minutes.  I feel fortunate to be living just about 5 minutes from the treatment center, so this does not take too long.  Hope the skins holds during the 33 treatments.  Every 5th treatment they'll take an x-ray to make sure we are still targeting the right area. 

I asked the nurses about putting on gels.  They told me the usual but also said to put some on the back, same general area as the front.  I'm starting with the Fruit of the Earth Aloe Vera gel and then may use Radiaguard tonight.

I have completed a week and a day of rad tx, so far.  I have 27 more treaments to go.  No SE's yet (hopefully not at all).  I am using Aquaphor that I picked up from Walgreens, and being a school teacher, I have been able to schedule treatments during the summer, so I don't have to miss work (like I did with 4 months of chemo).  Good luck and God bless to all here.

OK, 4 tx down 12 to go. I am SOOOO happy the radonc let me do the Canadian protocol. Facing that machine 33 times would really be hard for me.

redsoxfan: (go Rays!) re: lung-I started having a dry cough after 2tx. Thinking that can't be good. Doc on vaca til Fri.

mixin: re: machines - I close my eyes and call on God to protect my good cells and then I chant "Die cancer die!!". Seems to work for me so far. Eyes must be closed though.

Karen: So glad you are done! Best wishes!

Spendygirl & Faithfulc: You can do it girls! One foot in front of the other!

Sherster26: You GO!!

Had the simulation today.  Everyone was pleasant, efficient, resposive.  Met with rad onc who answered all my questions and accepted my assertion that this invisible procedure called for a real leap of faith. He was reassuring and not judgmental.  Even asked what he could do to help me with the trust issue.  Truly, there's nothing.  I know it's just something I need to get through.  I've done what I could do:  seek out what I believe is a top notch team.  Then he showed me some of the "slides" from the CAT scan.  My heart is completely out of the line of fire, but will get some radiation scatter along with everything else.  He also said that about 11.5% of my left lung will be radiated.  Of course I wish this could be avoided. More than anything else, though, I want to be rid of any remnant of the tumor that may still be there, left from the biopsy or the excision.  Only cried a little today.  Was surprised when the rad onc said that for many women the first day can be emotional.  This made me like him more. 

I'd like to mention that the tech told me to try to avoid taking a deep breath because doing that exposes more of my lung to radiation.  For me, now that I'm thinking of it, this could be a problem.  BarbaraA, just as you did, I closed my eyes.  Mixin, when I closed my eyes, I prayed. That's how I got through my mri too.  Kind of a chant.

 Emu oil tonight. Real machine tomorrow.  11:24 AM.

The rest of the day was lovely, actually.  Had a delightful dinner on this early summer evening with my family at Quincy market. One of the sweetest birthdays I can remember having.  More so because, since this all began, I've become so much more aware that life is precious and that my family is a gift.  I feel so blessed.

Good luck to all of you.  I love reading your thoughts and experiences.  We can do this!!

God bless us all.

PS  BarbaraA- Tampa can feel the hot Bosox ready to move up and tackle the Yankees.  Watch out!

kickonit2 and redsoxfan - Don't be scared...well be scared but know YOU CAN DO THIS. Sox, at least your doc listens to you. Mine thinks I am a big PITA and rolls his eyes when I ask questions. Great. Kick, after the sim TALK TO YOUR radonc and ASK him exactly what will get hit and how much. Mine reluctantly told me no heart and a teeny bit of lung. Teeny to him but it's MY lung.

Today was #5 of 16 tx. Have been having dry cough since Sat and lung tightness and shortness of breath yesterday PM. Seemed better today but yesterday didn't start until 3 hours after tx. Doc on vaca but standin doc said to see if it gets worse and if so, we'll do a chest xray. Great, more radiation. I told them to check the treatment field to make SURE everything is going where it's supposed to. Whew.

Last night (despite having had 9 hours sleep the night before), I got so tired at 9PM, I just crashed.

Chin up all. We can and will git R Dun!!

PS Sox - I am totally fine with the Sox taking the damned Yankees out. Go for it.

Yesterday after the second treatment it was time to meet with the doctor.  My regular doctor was on vacation, so I saw someone else.  He was very nice and patient.  I asked to see my treatment plan and he brought in my files.  There was one printout that had 6 CT scan pictures with the radiation "topography" and he explained what was going to happen.  I asked for a copy of it and he said he'll have a color copy prinited out for me so I can pick up today. 

Take the matter into your own hands and ask for your plan.  These plans, just like the MRI, CT, mammogram and any other test we've gone through, belong to us.  The hospitals are just keeping them for us and should not hesitate to give us a copy when we ask for one.

I met 'the machine' today.  I start on Monday too - I'm either having 26 or 32 treatments, not sure yet.  I'm all marked up and ready to go. They suggested aloe vera capsules from the health food store - so I'll be in search of those this weekend. 

BarbaraA, glad you are almost halfway done.  I wish I had only 16 in total.  Just finished my first week and I'm slightly pink.  I hope for the next 5 weeks my skin will hold up.  Have a good weekend, everyone.

kickon2it, mixin, BarbaraA, and all Junes:

Well, 3 down and 27 to go.

You know that visual joke where you wet your index finger in your mouth and touch it to your butt and it sizzles?  That's all I could think of for the last three days when I got home and took off my totally sexy hook-and-eye close-in-the-front white cotton sporty bra.  My left breast really gets hot.  And a little pink and a little swollen.  Lots of aloe and emu oil (w/a little vitamin E)-->back to normal by morning. Hopefully, this program keeps working.

Kind of concerned about the morning cough.  We've got the A/C going (Thank God for A/C) so it's not pollen.  But definitely junky and hard to get up.  I believe it's lung irritation from the radiation.  Hopefully, this will be the extent of the lung effect.  Doing a lot of deep breathing.

My daily routine:  Load the car with a bag in case I decide to stay in town; also small cooler with cold water (Someone, somewhere wrote to drink water like your life depends on it, so I try to); 8AM Mass (with A/C); home for a last pit stop; one and a half hour -two hour drive (depending on traffic); valet park (nice guys); radiation around 11:30AM; some days lunch with friend or family; reverse direction. Never minded driving.  Car is comfortable.  Have the radio, cd's, cell phone, A/C.  Thinking about books on tape. Yes, I'm obsessed with A/C.  I used to love the summer heat and wasn't bothered much by the humidity.  But the sauna sessions (too steamy,sustained [are they coming in multiples?] to be called hot "flashes")  have changed that and the da*n things seem to be prevented and definitely shortened with A/C.

When I start tamoxifen, I may need the A/C even in the wintertime. Or maybe I could sleep next to an open window....

Some of the radiation techs are more pleasant than others.  They're all obsessive about positioning and I'm grateful for that.  There's a computer in the room and on the screen there's an outline of the portions of the breast that will be treated that day.  The linear accelerator is only on when the red light turns on and the warning sound buzzes.  I wonder if I don't inhale while the buzzer is on, can I help minimize lung damage?  Any thoughts?  Will ask on Monday.  Or Tuesday when I see the rad oncologist.

Looking forward to hearing from all.  The good, the bad, the ups and downs, the routines.  How your skin and your stamina and your psyche are holding up. 

Honestly, it's wonderful to not be going through this alone, isn't it? 

God bless us all.

PS  BarbaraA--If the Rays can take out the Yankees, I'm a fan.

Barbara, where do you buy emu oil?

I had a hard time keeping my spirits up this week. It's just really difficult to see what some of the other cancer patients are going though. An 82 year old lady goes before me; she has to have 44 treatments to her lung. A new one comes after me and she's been through chemo already. She's in a wheelchair but always smiles and says "hi"; her dh looks like his whole world is falling in on him.

My skin is doing good after 13 treatments; whenever anything begins to heat up, I put cool washclothes on the places until the heat goes away. My right one gets 3 zaps and the left one gets 2; the triangular place on my upper chest seems to get the hottest. Probably because there isn't any fat there?

My energy was about zip yesterday; that was the first time I've really noticed it being low. Maybe my attitude contributed. I had a talk with the radiologist about how cancer can enter the blood stream, even with no node involvement... and found that whole discussion kind of depressing. The only thing certain about this disease is that it's horrid. 

mixin  Please try to take today and just rest. This %^$&ing disease sucks but I believe half the battle is attitude. Just rest and put on your battle gear tomorrow and get on with the war.

bambers88 - how great not to have mets but your radonc needs to grow some compassion. Your chemo response was great. No reason to think you won't have a great response with rads. Attitude! You are almost there, only 1 week and a half. Keep going. Throw everything at the the sucker! Attitude!

You are both in my prayers.

I finished week 3 of rads - 14 treatments done, 11 to go! Everyday I count off another 4% done. My skin so far is pretty good - it's a little red and little flakes of skin are coming off. My radiation oncologist said as long as I don't blister, my skin is doing well. The worst thing right now is the fatigue. I am trying to sleep more, but still tired in the morning when I wake up. I have to teach 8-12 every morning, then I go to rads and try to go home to put aloe gel and have a little nap before I pick up my daughter. Sometimes my husband takes me, especially when I am running late - he can get the car and pick me up in front of my building (we work in adjacent buildings on campus). One day this week, I was REALLY tired. I lay down to take a nap at 3pm, and didn't wake up until 6am the next day! Luckily it was a day that my husband was driving, so he picked up our daughter afterschool. But there are also times during the day that I feel fine, so the fatigue comes in waves. That makes it difficult to anticipate what I can do. It is a bit frustrating at times. But it is nice to be able to "talk" to others on this forum.

I am beginning week 3 today. As of Friday my skin was turning pink, breast ached a little and has a "thick" feeling. I still have 5 more weeks to go and am worried how my skin will manage. I am constantly putting on aloe, lotions etc to keep the skin issues at bay, but it doesn't seem to be working as well as I had hoped. The fatigue is becoming as issue for me also. I was ok for the first week and a half, but have noticed my sleeping habits changing. I used to sleep about 7 hours a night, now its more like 9 hours a night. After I get home from my rads appt I just want to sleep. I used to make wonderful meals for my hubby, now I just don't have the energy to do it. PB&J anyone...ha!

Good luck to all of us in the week ahead!

Ana

day 9 of 26 for me. skin is ok, using aquaphor but i am very achy and tired. i also am noting that when i am sleeping my hands fall asleep and also i seem to swell easily in my fingers. i did some research on rads  and aching and there is some out there.

ray