Sunday Morning

Options
whichwitch
whichwitch Member Posts: 17
edited June 2014 in Palliative Therapy/Hospice Care

My other sister is staying with Linda and Linda will be blessed with my body today.   Doing laundry and drinking coffee and crying, which is all i seem to be doing anymore.   It is so hard to see a sister going through this.  I wish so much it was me instead of her, but hey, that's not how it is.  If you guys have any ideas for me and my sister on what we can do for Linda, please let us know.  Linda is in a lot of pain still and Hospice is still trying to work it out.   The weekends are the hardest because you know you can not get any results.  Well, here's to another cup of Jo.  Wish you all well and thanks for listening to me vent.  I will in return listen to you as well........Peace and love to all

Paula

· Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Comments

  • ead
    ead Member Posts: 686
    edited April 2010

    Dear Paula, my heart aches for all of you. I cannot imagine how you are feeling. I can tell you Linda knows you are there with her for support. You may vent any time you want here and yell and scream, we understand. I wish I could take Lind's pain all away and you and your sister's pain that you are feeling emotionally. I have 2 sisters, they are younger than me. I know when it will be my time they will be very devastated. We very rarely talk about cancer,I think they may be in denial perhaps, but then what would they say. Paula just being there for your sister is such a huge help. I wish I could help you more, I am sending Linda you and your other sister cyber hugs.

    Try and stay strong.

    Liz

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • konakat
    konakat Member Posts: 6,085
    edited April 2010

    Hi Paula -- I think you and your sister are already doing everything you can.  You're wonderful!  I can understand that it's so very frustrating watching your sister decline and not being able to do anything about it.  The only thing I can think of is the occasional distraction from BC.  Maybe roll in the TV and DVD player and have a movie night, PJs, and a bunch of laughs.  Something that's "normal".  All I can think of is follow Linda's lead, how she's feeling for the day. 

    Linda is very open and matter of fact, as you know.  Perhaps ask her what you can do.  Maybe she's content with things as they are now.  Since she referred you to this site she is worried about you -- maybe reassure her that you're OK.  Sorry this isn't much help but I think you're doing a great job taking care of your sister.  Hugs,

    Elizabeth

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • gsg
    gsg Member Posts: 3,386
    edited April 2010

    Hi, Paula.  

    I took care of my stepfather until the end.  He had kidney cancer.  He, too, was in a lot of pain and we had trouble getting ahead of it, so I have an idea of what you are going through.   Does Linda enjoy music?  Playing soft music...her favorite songs....may offer her a brief mental escape from what she's going through.  It can be soothing.  Hospice actually brought in a harpist one day to play in his room for him.  It was beautiful.  We learned it was best to have the room as quiet as possible as his pain levels increased.  No loud voices or noises, but at times he did enjoy the music and television or having us read to him.  Sometimes he liked us to rub lotion on his hands, feet and legs.  

     I am so sorry you all are going through this heartbreaking time.  I am also sending you a PM.

     Wishing you all strength in the days ahead and hope that they will find a way to control Linda's pain.

    Patrice 

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • thenewme
    thenewme Member Posts: 1,611
    edited April 2010

    Hi Paula,

    Thanks so much for sharing Linda with us.  From reading her posts in the past, I know she's been soooo concerned for you and your other sister.  I'm so glad you're both able to spend time with her, and hopefully she'll feel at peace and reassured that you'll be ok.  Hugs to you all, and please let her know we're all thinking about her!

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • ElaineD
    ElaineD Member Posts: 2,265
    edited April 2010

    Have no idea what to suggest-but I imagine that just having you near will be a huge comfort. It might be worth asking if there are times she wants to be alone? Sometimes when pain becomes overpowering we may want to retreat a little from our loved ones-mainly, if truth be told, so they don't have to witness our pain. Just  a small thought-but an important one-and I hope it helps,x

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • PauldingMom
    PauldingMom Member Posts: 927
    edited April 2010

    I can only imagine what the three of you are going through. How about old pictures from when you all were little. Days when life was easy and your biggest problem was who got the prize in the bottom of the cereal box, or got the best Barbie to play with. 

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • cookiegal
    cookiegal Member Posts: 3,296
    edited April 2010

    If a whole move is too long...is there a favorite tv show you could get on DVD. Or maybe a book on tape?

    I have an electronic picture frame that scrolls pictures, maybe something like that would be comforting.

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • pookie61
    pookie61 Member Posts: 257
    edited April 2010

    I really enjoy people reading out loud to me, especially when I am ill.  If she is a reader and has some all time favorite books, it might be soothing to hear you or your other sister read them out loud.  Or maybe just holding her hand and softly talking about the times you have shared together. 

    You sound like a wonderful sister and I am so glad that you are there helping Linda.   Many hugs to all of you. 

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • TriciaK
    TriciaK Member Posts: 362
    edited May 2010

    If your sister is in pain still you need to call in a pain mananement specialist. There's really no need to be in pain for any cancer patient.  Please advocate for her and insist with her onc her pain be managed better:)

    My best to you both

    Tricia xx

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • chainsawz
    chainsawz Member Posts: 3,473
    edited May 2010

    Paula - I'm just stopping by to give you all a cyber hug :>  I hope the pain management has been much better for Linda.  We are all thinking of her!  xx00xx lisa

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • whichwitch
    whichwitch Member Posts: 17
    edited May 2010

    Linda's pain management is much better.   Thank you so much for the cyber hug.   Love those hugs.   thank you so very much  Paula

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • getwell
    getwell Member Posts: 535
    edited June 2010

    Dear Paula,

     Here is another cyber hug. Sometimes a hug is all we have to offer.

    Love,

    Pat

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Categories