In such fear

maryvanessa1 · May 2010

Just diagnosed 4/14/2010 with DCIS, non-invasive. caught very early, havingwide excision on june 3, scared out of my mind. breast surgeon says he doesnt anticipateany surprises with the surgery, but once you get a shock like this, you are afraidto hear anything more. I still jump every time the phone rings. I am also insulin-dependentdiabetic. my stress is over the top. I am trying to think logical and positive, knowingthere are so many survivors these days and with all the great technology, drs. are savinglives every day. I just feel so emotional and vulnerable. i was told i would have to go for radiation. Everything is scaring me right now, even thoughi trust the breast surgeon... im afraid he may find something more. I really need support rightnow and to hear good stories. Thank you all for letting me vent. maryvanessa
Diagnosis: 4/14/2010, DCIS, 2cm, Stage 0, 0/0 nodes[Edit] [Delete]

AlohaGirl · May 2010

Hang in there, maryvanessa1! This is the scariest time. I was diagnosed early last year and the beginning was the hardest. Hopefully having a treatment plan will give you some direction and make you more comfortable. I had lumpectomy followed by radiation and I was really scared, especially about the radiation, but both were easier than I had feared and now you can only tell which breast I had surgery on by a very faint scar and slight tanning left over from the radiation. I know some people have more difficulties with treatment than I did, but hopefully they will go smoothly for you. You will be fine!

AlohaGirl · May 2010

I should have mentioned, when I was first diagnosed I had some anxiety issues and my doctor gave me a few (10 or so) xanax. It could be helpful to get something like that or ativan or another antianxiety medication to help you through the next couple of weeks. At least worth discussing with your doctor.

dsj · May 2010

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I know, first-hand, how scary it is. However, I did feel a lot better once treatment got underway. My story is still pretty new, but good so far. I had lumpectomy surgery and all they found was the DCIS they expected to find. The surgery itself was really easy; I had no pain whatsoever after it. My breast looks exactly the same as it used to, except for the scar. I then had radiation and had no side effects, except some small itchy bumps (which I was told are damaged sweat glands). Tomorrow I have a followup with medical oncologist and will very probably start taking tamoxifen. Of course I still get scared, but I hope and feel the worst is behind me. I will have yearly mammograms and yearly MRIs, alternating every six months, so will be closely monitored. I have said to myself that I am going to do my best not to worry about it, except when I am having mammogram or MRI, because I can't imagine not worrying then. However, I do not want this to define my life. I hope this helps. You will find excellent support on this board. There are very knowledgable people who can answer questions and guide you to good resources, and there are very caring people who will give you emotional support. And many (most) will give you both.

helenap · May 2010

i am just two weeks out from my diagnosis and it is down right scarey until you start researching and understanding the options. And eventhough we are originally diagnosed with DCIS that doesnt mean the final pathology will be that.. BUT I just read an article tonight that there is 100 percent survival rate regardless of the original diagnosis (Icomedo cells or no comedo cells), regardless of treatment option (masc versus lump)... over 10 years.. that is good good news. so with early diagnosis, it means we are here to fight again and again. so even with reoccurences; we are living longer and fuller lives.

it is hard to take that deep breathe and until I heard the news from my doctor that I am in no danger; it is just hard to take - the cancer word.

lila3357 · May 2010

im sorry you are facing such a difficult time. i was diagnosed in 11/09 with DCIS and then again in sept with ADH on the other side. I was completely shocked and emotionally distraught when i actually heard that i needed surgery, radiation,, drugs and continual monitoring. I felt robbed of my good health but at the same time determined not to miss a beat. Of course I missed a few!!....but i went through it all and my fears were alot worse than the actual procedures. I only wish i found this site sooner. I find this to be the only place where I know that these women know and understand what i am facing and feeling. I dont post often but i read and follow up with much concern about all who are on here. Tomorrow I go for an MRI. I have not had a clear report since 11/09 but somehow i have mustered the strength to do what needs to be done. and i have accepted that this has become a "part" of my life. There are still many other parts to fulfill. You are in the most difficult time...and you will get through it. Somehow you just do. Make sure you feel confident that you have enough information to make all your decisions ....dont be afraid to ask and ask and ask so that you are prepared tor the many twists and turns along the way . THinking of you and sending positive thoughts your way

maryvanessa1 · May 2010

what does adh stand for?

will send you healing thoughts and vibrations as well.

thanks so much

speech529 · May 2010

Hi Maryvanessa

I am sorry you are going through all of this. It is a shock to say the least. I was diagnosed with DCIS in late March. My lumpectomy is on June 2 (and I am having a hysterectomy at the same time). I may have to have radiation, but that will depend on the pathology report. Looking back on these past two months, I think I have been in a partial state of denial. It's hard to believe for me. Each person's reaction is different and totally normal! I hope that you will find peace in all of this and answers to all of your questions. I have resigned myself to knowing that my life is a bit on hold right now until I go through these surgeries and find out if I need any more treatment. God bless you!

3jaysmom · May 2010

hi sweetie, believe me, when i tell u this IS THE scariest part, the beginnig, and the fears. i agree, if u r not opposed ask for some meds. to keep u calk. f ur a believer, pray for a good result. i am 11/2 yrs out now. i had same diagnosis as u, but made different desicions. my bs ran extra tests both on cancerous side, and "good" side. they showed more stuff than orig. found.he was willing to go with lump.with rads. but i also have multiple sclerosis, and that complicates all of it. i finally chose to have doble masectomy..probably overkill, but i knew with my poor health 2 begi with, i couldn't face more and more. the research, and what i've learned here, it very well have been overkill,but i'm still ok with my desision. i did chemo, but no rads. and rads with dcis is usually targeted, and not badf. i had no pain at all, so urs should be fine.. we all do different things, mine was very aggressive, and atatched 2 chest wall, so it turned out good decision 4 me.. ill be watching 4 u on site. we r all fighting and many many women here r yrs. away from first big scare. try and stay as calm as u can, know ur right, there's great tech. now..and getting better everyday. light and love,3jaysmom

maryvanessa1 · May 2010

dear 3jaysmom, thank you so much for your response. its harder for us since we

have other conditions

mine, being insulin diabetic. I am feeling more calmer after reading these posts and

so far i can see the love and caring from people i dont even know, you being one of the them.

I will continue to post, esp. after the surgery and on june 11, i will know all the final results.

dont think i can deal with hearing any more bad news, Hope my margins are clear

and I am at grade 0, one can only hope. My surgeon did say i will need 5-6 weeks of rads.

wish i was past this already... i have to keep the faith.

sincerely, maryvanessa

lila3357 · May 2010

maryvanessa

Glad you are feeling a bit calmer. Reaching out and knowing you can come here for support I hope continues to be helpful for you.

ADH is atypical ductal hyperplasia. it is a condition in which the cells which line the milk ducts of the breasts experience abnormal growth. This condition is not cancerous, but it does indicate an increased cancer risk for women and typically requires removal. Often is difficult to differentiate between DCIS and ADH. Different pathologists may classify ADH as DCIS and vice versa.

For me the only difference was that i had radiation after the DCIS diagnosis but not after ADH.

Try to keep calm! Wishing you an uneventful day with no more news!!!!

mercurialqueen · May 2010

Hi, Maryvanessa:

I'm sorry for all the worries you are goint through now. I was diagnosed with DCIS at the begining of April. When I had the mammogram that showed microcalcifications and the doctor told me I needed a biopsy, I coudn't stop crying, felt nauseous, vomited a few times. I was in complete show and had a paralysing fear. The first surgeon I went wanted to do a mastectomy, I know that many women do that, it's a personal choice. I went for a second opinion and liked the doctor so much that I'm sticking with this one. I want to try the least invasive procedure first. On June 1st I am having a wide excision. I am feeling so much better now. This forum gave me so much good information. Now I say, "do I feel lucky I have breast cancer? no, do I feel lucky I have DCIS? yes." I read one of the reports that my doctor wrote and he said that I have the same probabilities of living another 20 years now as I would have if I didn't have this. I am 51 y.o. The radiations reduce that chance of recurrence by half. Read the posts from Bessie, she's an expert here, very smart lady with a lot of knowledge and good information. Another thing that helped me at the begining was taking an occasional Ativan.

I wish you the best sweetie. You will be added to my list for prayers. I will let you know about my surgery so you'll have a little more info.

Maria.

wyldblumusic · May 2010

Hello, Maryvanessa.

The ladies have given you great advice. I completely agree that the time just after diagnosis is one of the most difficult and frightening. First, we have to wait for results. Then, we have to wait for a treatment plan. Ugh...the waiting is so hard.

I began to feel better once I was doing something. I don't know if this will help you, but here's something that helped me. Thinking about the entire big picture can be overwhelming. So, I started to think about my treatment as individual steps, and I consider getting through each step a major accomplishment. Surgery 1? Done! Surgery 2? Done! Soon, I will be able to say radiation - Done! It does get better. I do not mean to suggest that it is easy or without some bad times, but it does get better.

Warmest wishes.

waltersren1 · May 2010

Hello.I had my excisional biopsy on 4/14/10 and my doctor called me on Sunday 4/18 and told me I had DCIS.Wasn't expecting to get that call on a Sunday.Anyway,I know how scary it is.I have been worrying myself about all the what ifs.They didn't get clean margins when they did the biopsy so I had my wide excision lumpectomy 5/18/10.It was a little more painful then I was expecting I guess because I didn't have hardly any pain with the biopsy.I already have implants so I already have a plastic surgeon.He came in after my bs had finished the lumpectomy and placed alloderm to fill in the area.I am now waiting to see if they get clean margins this time.If so I will be starting radiation in a few weeks then the tamoxifin.I really just want to hear the pathology from the lumpectomy and pray it is just DCIS without any invasive cancer found.I think then I will be able to relax some.I'm glad this site exists so we can all talk with others that know what we are going through.Good luck with your surgery.

In such fear

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