After Treatment!!!!
Comments
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Why oh why do I still keep waiting for the other shoe to drop!
I am so anxiety ridden and keep waiting for IT to happen when they say you have progressed too stage 4. Being stage 3 I feel its only matter of time. Yes I am on antidepressants 150, time release effexxor. I still can not shake it. I am stage 3 and am ER+/PR+/HER-2+++. 5 nodes positive. I so hate this feeling,and yes I have had counsling. Maybe not tthe right kind not sure, I am from Maine and we aare limited. I know some of it is cause I have not finish with reconstruction and I know that will make me feel better about myself, but I can tell you the truth its always haunting me.
People tell me how well I look but I just want to scream, that I am living in fear everyday and just waiting for the bad new's!!!!
How do I get over this feeling?????????? And move on with life without the fear that is with me evryday???
Any help would be appreciated or others whom feel the same.
Bridget
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Hi Bridget!
I understand completely. You describe that feeling perfectly. And nobody understands, not even those who love you. But how could they?
I'm going to my breast surgeon today for the first time since all of my nightmares began a year ago. I had a lumpectomy last May with dirty margins. Then anotther lumpectomy with dirty margins. Then a right mastectomy followed by chemo and rads. I couldn't teach last year. I am finally beginning to feel like myself. I'm having reconstruction in a month. I'm going back to first grade in the fall. Everything is "normal". So why am I scared to death "waiting for the other shoe to drop"? This appt. today has me shaking.
So I get it. And I'm sorry. Please feel free to pm me any time. And do something nice for yourself today!!!
Janice
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