Just diagnosed and scared

ladym...sorry about your dx but as the others have said, you will get through this and there are lots of women here to support you. There are many of us Canadians and many who live in the GTA. We are all at various stages in our journey. I was also told no immediate recon. The p/s here are very reluctant to do anything until treatment is over when there is a possibility of rads. They are more conservative than the p/s in the US but they say that they want to give us the best possible outcome and waiting is what they recommend. It is also very difficult to arrange coordination between the p/s and the b/s so first thing is to get rid of the disease and get you healthy. However, there are lots of good p/s around and it's not too soon to book consults. Best wishes.

I was the same weight last week as I was on the day of my first chemo 11/30/09.  I've tried to continue to eat healthy (other than adding ice cream as an almost daily treat!).  I've worked out at least a little every day other than treatment days since about a month into chemo.  I think that helped balance out the Haagen-Dazs butter pecan. 

ladym,

I have nothing new to add that these wonderful women haven't already said.  I just wanted to add my welcome.  You'll get through this.  I was diagnosed at age 42 with an 8 year old son.  

Come here often to vent.  We get it and will hold your hand.

ladym13  - Having breast cancer can be very scary, but HERE IS THE GOOD NEWS, you will, as so many have posted ALREADY get good support here.  Just reading can help, and others responding to your post will also help, I also did lot of research in Google.  I found "Cure" magazine to be helpful, especially when I was at the end of treatment but also about Breast Cancer in general. Plus it is FREE, here is their link  http://www.curetoday.com

When you are done with treatment Cure Mag. had a supplemental addition to their magazine called "Survivorship" which was for me quite helpful.  I know end of treatment may feel awful far, but I would have preferred being told and educated on "survivorship" before I was at that point, so I am passing that on.

Chemo for me was not that bad. My main thing was fatigue, so I had some wonderful naps. LOL Nausea was handled with medication.  I had no idea what to expect with Chemo and what I envisioned was SO MUCH WORSE, oddly that left me feeling like OH, OK I can do this. Just take it one step at a time, you can do it!   Communicate what is going on with YOU to your DOCTORS and CHEMO NURSE's during you treatment. They are your TEAM and are there for you too!  You are not alone, you have a big TEAM to help you!

We all go thru what we go thru, some similar some different.  How you feel is how you feel, end of story!  Some of my feelings surprised me....BUT what got me thru was my attitude and my love of humor!  Don't get me wrong their were plenty of tears but after I started Chemo I chose to focused on getting the Nurses to laugh, finding HUMOR in things........  When so much SEEMS wrong, I focus on WHAT is right, what is good, funny, uplifting, helpful.....I left negative in the closet (not that it didn't get out once in a while)!

Always feel free to PM me, I am older but like many here I am alway willing to help!  WISHING YOU THE BEST!  Big Hug to you!

Susie

Hi there,

I just saw your post.  I am SO sorry you are traveling this journey.  But the ladies here are invaluable for their knowledge, comfort and support.  Feel free to ask and and all questions, and don't ever be afraid to bitch, cry, whatever.  Trust me, we've all been there, and I for one and still going through it all.  Just finished chemo Tuesday, have a 3 week "break" then start radiation.  Take it one step at a time, and get informed.  Don't worry, you will not travel this road alone.

Keep us posted on how you are doing!
Sharon

Hi Mo,

Wow, I'm sorry I haven't checked back in with you.  I didn't realize your surgery was this past Tuesday, and YES it does get better.  Don't get me wrong, this whole BC sh%# is a physical and emotional roller coaster.  Some days you are at the top of the hill and feeling great, other days you are at the very bottom.  I've said before---can someone stop this ride now? I want to get off!  Hopefully you are feeling a little better by now, if you are in physical pain GET BETTER PAIN MEDS!!!!  You do NOT need to suffer!  And by all means, if emotionally you are overwhelmed please see a doc.  If only temporary they might be able to prescribe something to give you relief. 

Did the doc give you any more feedback regarding what they saw in surgery? Was there lymph node involvement?  Please remember your final pathology may come back in stages so you may not get all your information at one time.

Keep us posted how you are doing, and feel free to PM me anytime.

Take care,

Sharon

Ditto to what the others have said it does get better.  There will be good days and bad days, both physcially and emotionally.  I know it's hard and right now it all seems like the road you're traveling is so long, but before you know it you will have traveled it at lighting speed and you will be at the end.  Know that you can come here anytime you need to vent, rant, complain, ask questions or need a cyber hug.

Mo, so sorry to read you are not doing good emotionally. I can totally relate but there will be good days. What kept me going was to read any posts on here I could find from people 5+ years out. You will find so many that are willing to answer any of your questions if you ask or private email them. I even have quite a few I met here on my facebook. Sometimes you might feel like your world has stopped totally as you knew it but it seems others just get to keep going and it does not seem fair. I spent way too much time being angry and saying why me. All that anger was not good for me at all but it is hard not to let yourself think that way. You will gain some remarkable friends through your journey.The good thing that came out of my journey is that I accept each day as a new day and I so am getting used to not planning my life month's ahead of time. I try to enjoy each day. There are a few that really helped me through my down times, so keep posting here and talking to others here, you will get through it.

I was also Stage 3A with 6/9 lymph nodes removed.  I will finish chemo on May 3!!!! Then wait the 3 weeks and start radiation.  You worried about not getting to start reconstruction for one year - from my perspective - that will probably be better.  Apparently, I had a stealth tumor up under the nipple of the left breast - showed 1.5 cm on the ultrasound but post mastectomy pathology showed it was a 6 cm.  Anyway, I had chosen a mastectomy, a prophylactic mastectomy of the right breast and immediate reconstruction.  I had expanders put in under the chest muscle because everyone was expecting this to just be simpler than it turned out to be.  So - I've had to go through chemo, will go through radiation with these hard little rocks in my chest.   Believe me, if I had it do over again (and knowing what I know now) -  I would have just done the double mastectomy, healed and then started reconstruction - about a year out later.  The time to heal would have been soooooo wonderful.

 I've been able to run, cycle and exercise all through chemo and have missed no work for after effects.  I can't emphasize enough, that for me, exercising and staying active has saved me.   The stress of this, as we all know, is enormous and this has helped me cope.    Sleepless nights - no clue how to fix those though.

Other hint - get the Biotene mouth care products now - help immensely to eliminate dry mouth.    Also - Eurcerin hand cream for hands and the jar kind for about two months post mastectomy to help the scars go away.  I'm would love to hear tips from others on the scar tips too. 

 Oh - and buy your wig before you lose your hair - you're more in the mood to shop for it. 

Hmm - what else -  oh!  Stretch as soon as you can to start getting back arm flexion.  That takes time - about 3 months to get back to normal - but stretching is important.  And since you are also getting the lymph node removal, get fitted for a compression arm sleeve sooner rather than later.  Helps a lot. 

I need to get input from others on what to expect on radiation - so far this board is a godsend for all of this and I am so glad to find it!