Exchange City

It is so encouraging to read about the exchange surgery being so much easier!  That helps ease my mind!  My PS also had told me most women don't have pain during the fill and that needle HURT going in!

Nedeza I'll probably end up doing my non-surgical side to match at the same time as the exchange as well, so that was interesting to learn it was more painful for you than the exhange side.  I know my PS nurse said some women just decide they've had enough surgery and do not do the other side to match, but I kind of think that I've gone through all of this to look somewhat "normal" again, I might as well be as "normal" as I can at this point.

I haven't been wearing a bra at all at this point. I tried again today and made it about 4 hours before it had to go.  I think having the TE in place just made it too uncomfortable.  I just wear little spaghetti strap tees under my blouses.  Of course I wear LARGE ones so no one can tell I'm "off"....at least physically!

Since I've had an augmentation, I know where my crease is supposed to be.  I never had any issues with bottoming out.  Hopefully this isn't the case.  The left has always been a bit higher.  I have pectus excavatum  - indented chest - so my rib cage is a little different that most people's.  I'll see what my PS has to say on Wednesday - St. Patrick's day!!!  Woo Hoo - here's to being Irish!!!

I have had the worse time with insomnia lately.  Last night I woke up at 1 am and could not go back to sleep.  Normally, I wake up at 4 am and can't sleep.  I've had a lot of stress lately.  I was thinking of seeing my GP about it.  Work has been crazy.  I was thinking about the post about being 15 days out.  I did a business trip at 14 days out.  It was just a day trip, but one of the ladies from my company's cancer support group called me.  She told me to not do so much and take it easy.   This might be my problem with bottoming out (if that's the case).  Everyone at work thinks I'm normal and okay (including my boss, I think).  sucks working in a male dominated industry! 

Get this!  I showed my husband two pictures--one from 4 weeks ago and one from today.  He starts talking about how much better they look.  Turns out he thought the picture 4 weeks ago was the one from today sooooo he's either lying to me just to shut me up and make me feel good or they really looked better 4 weeks ago.  I'm pretty sure he's lying because they did not look better four weeks ago!  Now how do I know what opinions have been honest and which were not--great now I get to go back into my own overanalyzing mode!

 Navy, Sure hope you feel better soon.

kittycat, I know the feeling.  You look okay so everybody assumes your back to normal.  It's very frustrating, hang in there!  I actually called in sick a couple times and said I was an emotional reck and needed a mental day.  My supervisor started to get it after that.

Julie 

Deborah,

can you tell me the Natori bras you like the most. for everyday wear?

YAY Judy...glad you are finally there. 

I never had trouble with sleeping until my dad passed away 2 years ago.  Since the night he passed away, I cannot sleep like normal.  Almost very night I wake up at 4 am.  I started feeling back to normal and then my sister went through BC.  Then, with me going through it.  2 years of hell. 

 Anyway, my stress at work doesn't help.  There have been a few people who have been terrible to me.  They don't know exactly what is wrong with me, but they know I've had "health issues."  To them, it's all about the money.  I've realized through this journey, there's a lot more to life than just work and material stuff. 

I feel bad for my hubby.  He has to suffer through my drama, but he's been very supportive.  He thinks we should be more active and that might be true. 

Kittycat: You have really been through a lot in the past two years and then for people to be terrible to you, it's no wonder you have been unable to sleep. What has finally worked for me is the Xanax. My BS gave it to me to take just before bed and usually it takes the edge off and turns my mind off and I sleep pretty well. I hate the drugs, but they sometimes are the best. I take .5mg and actually started taking it in the morning to keep the stress down during the day and the spasms away after BMX and exchange. I also try and read for 20-30 min before bed to ease into sleep.

I know how you feel about people being terrible to you, my boss has begun to treat me really terrible (and she's a woman). Most of this happened when I began this journey last summer. She won't let me off work to take DH to the Dr. after he had a trip to emergency room, wouldn't let me have an an extra day or two off after my exchange and nip surgery. Had it Friday and was back to work on the following Monday. Her thoughts were that I had a week off before surgery and should have had the surgery earlier in the week. Never mind that I work in same hospital where I had the surgery and we scheduled surgery earlier and then the OR changed it. It was out of my control. She just doesn't understand and my thoughts are she is jealous of some other things with me and is somehow afraid of me, like I want her job (LOL). My feelings are she is lucky I did not have to undergo chemo treatment and rads. I think she doesn't understand my decisions for prophy BMX and she thinks I was looking for an easy way out and new "Boobs". It surely wasn't her going through all of the anxiety of the repeat mammos, ultrasounds, MRI and multiple biopsies. The point here is that those who are terrible to us just don't understand and that they live in their own pathetic worlds. I figure what goes around comes around and I have outlasted several bosses of her demeanor. I just don't talk to her unless I have to and try to keep my situation to myself at work.

I hope things get better for you and you have my good thoughts and prayers. Hang in there and it will get better. 

kittycat, I'm so sorry you've had such a rough couple of years.  I agree, work is not that important.  Maybe finding a new hobby with your husband is a good idea.  What are you guys interested in?  I agree with Delilahbear, there are people that just don't get it and for some reason they seem think we want attention.  I recently told my boss that if she ever talked to me about a part of my job again, I would give her two weeks notice on the spot.  There are just some things that are not worth it.  As far as taking time off, I have no patience for that.  If you need it, take it, call in sick can they prove otherwise??  I'd like to see them write that one up!

Lynbob, no drains for me either but I know there are a few women who have had them.  It seems that some PS's do the routinely for exchange.

Julie 

Yay for you, Judy! I'm rooting for you! Maggie

Delilahbear and Kittycat, I'm sorry you have been having such a difficult time with unsupportive people in your life.  It totally sucks. 

Re insomnia and unsupportive people, I know it well. My college has been on a firing frenzy for a few years, and last summer they tried to end my contract early on the same day that pathologists reconfirmed their diagnosis of cancer.   Worst day ever: cancer and no job!!!!  I actually had to laugh - could life get any suckier?  On that day I completely stopped sleeping, and even though things got  better at work, I had to start using Lunesta.  Last week my Lunesta ran out, and surprise surprise I'm sleeping ok.  I still am up for 1-2 hours during the night, but that's normal for me.  Perhaps when we get through the surgeries, treatments and pain sleep becomes possible again?

I had so much fluid with the mastectomy that it took a long time to have my drains removed. After the PS removed them I developed seromas and PS had to drain them (ugh)  He said some people are more inclined towards developing the fluid and I seem to be one of them. He expects to send me home with drains. I hope they are more manageable. I didn't want to go back to work with them after the bmx but it sounds like I may have to after the exchange.

Big hugs for all of you who are not being treated with kindness. Delilahbear, are you able to get FMLA so that you can not be penalized for needing time off for your surgery and recovery?

Lynbob, Judy, bcincolorado, and all others on "Yippee Squishy" countdown:

I had two surgeries: exchange on my cancer side and, three months later, lift and augment on "good" side, combined with fipple creation on cancer side.  I didn't need drains for either surgery.  The exchange-only surgery was very easy for me, and I had no pain at all.  The longer surgery, I had some discomfort on the "good" side, but I wouldn't even call it pain.  Both were night and day easier than the mastectomy.  I hope you have it as easy as I did!!

Diane

Kittykat & Deliahbear~

Sorry to hear of what you've had to go through...especially with such uncaring people!  Certainly with what we have had to go through we have found out who really gives us support...who really do not.  Fortunately in my dental office my front office mgr. had BC & another had lost her husband to cancer.  They knew I needed to do what needed to get done.  I am grateful for that!  Support from my workplace was great but there are others I care to forget about for their lack of support.  Same with friends...you find out quickly who are there for you & who are not.  I know half the time it is probably because these friends do not know what to say...I don't blame them because the line "I know how you must feel" is not in their vocabulary when it comes to this.  This why THIS forum is so wonderful!!!  We can share our thoughts or vent without feeling like a complainer or feeling like we are burdening everyone.                                                         Thank you ladies for being there!

Lynbob-my PS told me when I was there that I would not have to deal with the drains after the exchange.  My husband had them after his transplant was done, but they did them in the hospital and they were gone before he got released.  Doing that stuff at home was defnitely not high on my "joys of life" list!

Diane-I love the "yippee squishy" phrase!  That's great!  What a wonderful thought!

For all of you dealing with icky bosses, I am so sorry for you.  In the big scheme of life there is so much more important stuff going on!

Best of luck to everyone having surgery this week!