MIDDLE-AGED WOMEN 40-60ish

Grace--re:  "This is not a diet. It is a lifestyle change and that is the only way diets really work."

Too true!  I have been overweight all my life, and have tried diet after diet.  I can't do it.  It's not a matter of will power, its a matter of I do not feel well or healthy or function well when my stomach is growling and I'm lightheaded from hunger 24/7.  I can't sleep, I can't enjoy ANYTHING.  I've lost weight on these diets, but it came right back when I finally couldn't take the starving feeling anymore.  Over the last couple years I've started a different approach--changing my nutritional habits.  I'm starting small, with baby steps--changing to whole wheat bread from white, aiming to eat 2 veggie servings a day and 2 fruit servings a day, now I'm adding exercise with the Wii Fit.  I'm not losing weight very fast, but I'm not gainging either.  I feel better, and I can live with this approach.  The weight may be coming off very slowly (about a pound a month) but I'm sure I'll KEEP it off this way.  

I'm going to have to look for whole grain tortillas, I love pizza, eat it way too often (but with veggie toppings!) and am not willing to give it up.  But change the way I make it? Sure! 

Whether or not my MIL lost weight is kind of a moot point. She consistently is super-skinny - likes to buy her clothing at "Limited, Too," where the target market is preteens. Is this due to the six months she spent on her version of Atkins? Is it the smoking and copious amounts of diet soda? Is it the compulsive walking of flights of stairs in my home to burn calories? Who knows. I will say that it was stressful to have her around my daughters - I had to find some politically correct way to say that "We love and respect Grandma but do not look to her as a good example for eating and healthy behavior." The Diet Rite, cigarrettes and big dinner thing was the worst. She'd get grumpier throughout the day, starving herself, and then at dinner, she'd have perhaps three chicken breasts, two cups of rice, multiple rolls, some veggies, and more diet soda.

I can still conjure up a mental picture of her standing at my counter, eating a really big leftover steak COLD with her bare hands. Yes, Adkins can involve a lot of meat consumption, but must you eat like a hyena at the kill?

(This is my husband's father's second wife - she's only about 12 years older than I am ((so she's late 50's)), and he's in his early 80's. She actually doesn't refer to herself as my MIL - she titles herself my children's grandmother.)

Kleenex-ain't that the truth! 

Trying to cut carbs way way down but not having much luck losing weight.  

Hi to all of you and I to was just recently diagnosed with BC I still remember the call after the biopsy like it happened moments ago. Part of me still wants to deny and the rest is so danged angry I dont know where to turn. I have had a partial and am waiting for my first oncology appt next week and I still not sure what to ask. All I can say is i am grateful that they got all negatives for my lymph nodes and that there was clear perameters around my 3+cm sized tumer. But am still scared to death all i keep think is it could come back as there is a large history of breast cancer in my family. I guess i should stop whining there are others a lot worse off than my diagnosis. I keep wanting to say  i did this to myself cause i had hormone therapy after my hysterectomy but i also know that it isnt all my fault. oh well any advise for next week would be appreciated.

Welcome, Deb.  This is the "In place" for us middle-agers who got "that call".  I was going to have a lumpectomy to get rid of the nasty cyst, when I got the call at about 9:00 the night before to cancel, so I could come in and get my options.

deb1, I also did HRT for 15 years.  My tumor was estrogen positive, so that is probably why I had BC.  I was on a very low dose and you know you hear about something causing cancer, but you trust and you feel better because of the HRT, so you take it.  I don't worry about how I got BC, because I can't go back and who knows it may not have been the HRT.  It could have been the DDT that we sprayed on each other as children or a million other things.  In the end, we will never truly know.    You just have to move forward and take care of the present.  Good luck to you on this journey.

Juannelle

OmahaGirl, don't you wish we women could shed the pounds as easily as men can?

I am actually grieving over a TREE at the moment, weirdly. When North Texas had that foot of heavy, wet snow a couple of weeks ago, a HUGE tree in my back yard lost about 1/3 of its crown and many large lower brances due to the weight of the snow. My backyard faces sort of west-southwest, and this tree shaded my master bedroom and gave my tiny Texas backyard a nice shady green feel. A tree trimmer is in the process of removing it now, and I think I'm going to go into shock. My thermostat was fried as I was growing up in AZ, and now the idea of all that uninhibited sunlight streaming onto my house is freaking me out. In addition to this, I'm down to just one box of Thin Mints - not enough to get over this.

On the funny side, the tree trimmer has put a sign in my front yard to advertise his services, but it's directly under a tree that now looks like a psycho attacked it with a chainsaw. It's a live oak that was very full, and the snow took out a branch in the middle of the top. It actually looks better than it did with the big broken branch hanging from the top, as they have removed that and attempted to thin the remaining branches in an attractive way (not), but it does NOT look like an advertisement for quality tree trimming.

I'm going to probably have to get some medication for my "Inverse Seasonal Affective Disorder" this summer - I already droop when it's endlessly sunny and hot, but without this tree, I might just lie on the floor of my pantry and refuse to come out...

Coleen

I am a little angel, except when my halo slips and begins to strangle me.

Let me add, your mom and your husband do have the beast in their lives, but not in the way that we have.  I know that when I was going through this, I couldn't see how anyone else was being affected.  I had no husband, my parents were supportive, but I had no idea how they were living in fear of losing their baby, and my children were good kids, and helpful, but maybe more so because they were afraid of losing their mom.  Even thought they were not going through the treatment, they were going through a torment.  I think it has just recently really been made clear that they were affected by the beast when DS said that he has been talking with the daughter of another of our BS sisters.  She said that it was helping to talk to someone who has been there.  Anyway, the truth is, we can talk about things here that we cannot talk with our parents, spouses, or children about, and we can receive the understanding which helps us endure the endless dr. appointments and decision making associated with BC.   But as much as we need hugs right now, our loved ones need them as well.  ((((((((((((((HUGS to all my BC Sistahs)))))))))))))  Pay it forward.

Hi! deb1,

I had hysterectomy, kept ovaries, never had hormone theropy, and now have BC.   Always have a  witness go with You to doctor visits, and get copy of pathology report with all test results.   Keep Your wits about You, because breast-cancer treatment is a confusing maze.

I walk the Survivors Lap in the Relay. I think it reinforces the cause for the people walking who don't have cancer.

I can't see crocuses as we still have at least of foot of snow on the lawn. Driveway and roads are bare though! Eee Haa!