My Friend Has Colon Cancer!

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BMac
BMac Member Posts: 650
edited June 2014 in Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts

I just found out my good friend has colon cancer.  I just can't believe it!  When her husband called on Saturday and said they'd had bad news, I thought it was going to be about her 86 year old mother.  Although I knew she'd gone for tests she'd told me she didn't think anything was wrong.

This was the friend that was so angry when I got a second cancer.  It felt so good to have her be angry on my behalf.  Her husband recently lost his father to lung cancer and they just found out a couple of weeks ago that his sister has breast cancer!  How much does one family have to deal with?

When Peter's father was going through treatments Diane kept telling him about me and how well I'd done with Stage III ovarian cancer and Stage III breast cancer.  When I spoke to her on the phone I told her to remember that!  She seems to have a good attitude, in fact cracked a joke when we first starting talking, in typical Diane fashion.

Luckily I'm not working right now so I've told her I can take her to treatments.  She's still in the stage where she's waiting for CT (tomorrow) but she's been told it will be surgery followed by chemo.  Her comment?  "I don't look good in hats."  I told her we'd go wig shopping.

I'm so mad.  We were supposed to go on a cruise in late January with another couple.  Diane is still hoping to go but a lot will depend on how soon she gets surgery and how quickly she heals as well as the timing of her chemo.  The other couple are their friends although we've met the socially quite a few times but we both feel guilty going without them!

I hate cancer.

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  • molly52
    molly52 Member Posts: 389
    edited December 2009

    Oh Barbara,  I am so sorry for your friend's dx.  You are a good friend to your good friend.  It is not only heart breaking news for your friend, but also during the holiday season when so many drs are away till January.

    I have a friend who had colon cancer 6 years ago and doing just fine.  So if a success story will help, now you got one.

    I'm thinking good outcomes for your friend.

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  • pabbie
    pabbie Member Posts: 370
    edited December 2009

    I had colo-rectal cancer in 1999; age 41. I had chemo. (5-fu and leukavorin (sp), radiation, and surgery. BC dx in 2008. When I was getting radiation for BC a lady (who was getting treatment for colon cancer) was wearing a portable port to get her chemo to go slower into her body. I think it was the 5-fu, leukavorin + another new one I think) When I was 41 I had my chemo IV pushed & I think it took a toll on my body. Maybe your friend could talk to the onc about the portable port. Also if she has any lymph node involvement, have her get referred to a lymphadema specialist after all her treatments.

    These are things I found out after my colo-rectal dx and treatments 10 yrs later; I was stage 3. I'de like your friend to get all the helpful info. she can get to help her w/ the easiest transition into life after cancer shmancer.

    P.S. I wish I would have had a friend like you. Take care. PM me anytime.

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  • BMac
    BMac Member Posts: 650
    edited December 2009

    Thank you so much ladies.  I'm so worried about her and she's been such a good friend to me.  Having had cancer twice has given me the tools to be a good support to her and that's just what I'm going to do.  You both have given me success stories to pass on to her.

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  • chainsawz
    chainsawz Member Posts: 3,473
    edited December 2009

    My aunt was diagnosed a few months ago with stage 3c colon cancer - she has one more month of treatment (6 months total) and she didn't lose her hair.  They receive a different sort of chemo than BC patients, so maybe she won't have to wear a hat?  I'm not sure, but wanted to let you know there is that possibility - she could ask her onc to find out for sure.  I also looked up colon cancer info for my aunt , and they actually have great treatments now and good response to the meds.  I think she could work with her onc about the timing of her trip and chemo.....they might be open to starting her chemo a week or two later so she can enjoy the cruise.  It's all about QOL, too :> 

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  • shiny
    shiny Member Posts: 892
    edited December 2009

    BMAC my friend was 37 last year when she had her treatment for colon cancer. 2 of my mother's friends have had colon cancer years ago and fine now. Every case is different, but sounds like your friends go get them attitude will go a long way in helping her cope. With you on board too, she is well encircled.

    Re the trip: My personal opinion is GO! 1- Guilt is optional and not terribly useful

    2- If she has a positive attitude during treatment, she will be "up" for all the fun stories you can share with her on your return and you can call and send anecdotes on postcards. She would be possibly forced to feel guilty and a burden herself if you didn't go which would be hard for her to deal with.

    3-If she is feeling rather low, then you recharging your batteries and getting some sun will help YOU to regroup and re energise YOURSELF in order to be a good support for her on your return.

    Be close, be supportive, but go, have fun and share your adventure with stories and pictures after, and scrap book, ideas and destinations for another jaunt when she is recovered from treatment!

    Just my humble opinion.

    Shiny

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  • BMac
    BMac Member Posts: 650
    edited December 2009

    Thanks everyone.  Well, she had her cat scan yesterday and she has to have the whole right side of her colon removed, the part that absorbs water.  Apparently she will have diarhhea for 6 months so it looks like travelling is out of the question

    Luckily she and her husband went away to Cozumel in November so at least they had a get away.  She's still keeping her options open though.  I know if she can go, she will.  She feels much more positive now.  They seem to think it's contained so that's good news.

    She doesn't know for sure if she's having chemo yet; surgery will determine that.  She could have had it on the 21st but has opted for the 30th (my birthday!).  Her son won't be home til after the 21st and she wants to tell him first but is waiting for him to finish exams.  This way she can enjoy Christmas.  She'll be in hospital over New Year's (5 to 7 days in hospital) but I think New Year's is overrated anyway.

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  • Kitchenwitch
    Kitchenwitch Member Posts: 374
    edited December 2009

    I wish your friend all the best with her colectomy - I was facing something similar and several doctors assured me that constant or frequent diarrhea was not necessarily an issue. I hope your friend has an easy time with her surgery. They also all said to me, Oh, you don't even NEED your colon. Meaning that I wouldn't have a "bag" and would eat like everyone else. I think the surgical techniques are better than they used to be. I hope it all goes well.

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  • BMac
    BMac Member Posts: 650
    edited December 2009

    Thanks everyone.  Today's surgery day so I'm anxiously awaiting news.  Her son has my and other friends' emails so he's to email us all when they get the results.  Her husband is having a difficult time due to losing his father in November to lung cancer and his sister has just been diagnosed with DCIS.  What a lot to deal with!

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  • Faith316
    Faith316 Member Posts: 2,431
    edited January 2010

    Barbara,

    Just wondering how your friend is doing? I also have a friend (an older lady probably in her 80s) who was recently diagnosed with colon cancer and awaiting surgery.

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