The lying by doctors needs to end..

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Jules824
Jules824 Member Posts: 85
edited June 2014 in Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts

First I'm told I don't have breast cancer, then handed a cancer bag, (while I'm in tears/confused), and then told by the oncologist well its not really breast cancer, BUT I have aggressive DCIS...Soo then weeks of more tests, then lumpectomy/surgery. Gee didn't know they operate on people who don't have breast cancer. Sounds like breast cancer to me! Lies!

Then I meet with the rads doc and she says if I get sick she didn't do it call my PCP. You can get sick from rads. So more lies!

Then I get my simulation, was told last week this would start things immediately, daily trips for rads and that I would be done by New Years. Oh no, the techs said they're swamped with patients, "they will call me in a week or 2 for my next appt for tats". More LIES.

My dear husbands job is nice enough that they are putting off his switching shifts and getting a promotion for me and he was supposed to start in Jan. and now its affecting his job because  they lied! (I cant drive I have other health issues).

I am fed up with the lies. The docs are making me worse "emotionally" than I already am. Soon I will have a nervous breakdown.

And oh of course I cannot switch hospitals, or I would. I am fed up to here!

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Comments

  • flash
    flash Member Posts: 1,685
    edited November 2009

    are you sure you can't switch??

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  • megryan57
    megryan57 Member Posts: 83
    edited November 2009

    Lies also about recovery. 6-8 weeks I was told after my double mastectomy to treat my DCIS (which fortunately for my doctors was OFFICIALLY breast cancer, cuz it IS). Well 14 months later, I'm still taking vicodin and definitely NOT fully recovered.

    Lie.

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  • Bellz
    Bellz Member Posts: 43
    edited December 2009

    funny how everyone else's life just keeps going on...oh sorry we will have to reschedule that surgery, I have heard that three times now. Ok yes she gives me reasons...but don't get my hopes up then dash them again. I have one expander that got infected and had to be taken out, so I am uniboob right now. AND I AM NOT PAIN FREE!!! AT ALL. Oh sure you will be able to take that big family vacation you have planned for the end of oct 09 is what they said in July. Well guess what we didn't get to go!!!! super disappointed and felt like I blew it for everyone. TO TOP OF THE LIES, I WAS TOLD I WAS CANCER FREE AFTER TWO LUMPECTOMY SURGERIES, THANK GOODNESS MY ONCOLOGIST DIDN'T FEEL THAT WAY AND SENT ME TO SOMEONE ELSE. LIES!!! I am so pissed off at cancer ruining my life, it wasn't perfect but it was mine.

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  • leaf
    leaf Member Posts: 8,188
    edited December 2009

    I know I'm very sensitive to lies/not being accurate.  (I have a history of trauma, and for many people with trauma, lies do not help at all. ) I have had doctors who belittled my situation, or made assumptions that were not, or at the time they could not know if, they were true.

    It is not helpful to belittle anyone's situation.

    A part of the problem (with the lying about cancer diagnosis) is semantics.  Cancer is,according to the National Cancer Institute,

    A term for diseases in which abnormal cells divide without control and can invade nearby tissues. Cancer cells can also spread to other parts of the body through the blood and lymph systems. http://www.cancer.gov/dictionary/?CdrID=45333

     Different people can have a different interpretatons about this definition.  Does it matter if only 0.0000001% of the people with a theoretical condition X  (I am NOT talking about DCIS) have it invade?  Does it matter if it takes 80 years for it to invade?  If it could invade but doesn't? I have LCIS (lobular carcinoma in situ), which most oncologists classify as benign, in spite of the name.  It was named before they knew the natural history of the condition.  

    Cancer is not a 'line in the sand', but an interpretation.  

    But when doctors/medical people tell you different stories, if they really don't know or don't allow you room for YOUR experience, it can be 'crazy-making'.   It makes it much more difficult to deal with an already charged experience. It erodes your trust.

    I can't stand it when people take blood and they say, "This won't hurt a bit", or "It will only be a bee sting."  They don't know how I will experience things.  Trauma can really change your experiences.   As children, we learn from our experience.  If we touch the stove, we learn that can hurt. So we avoid touching the stove.

    Expectations matter.  Everyone needs to at least make room for YOUR experience.  It makes me crazy when people don't allow you to have your experience.

    I'm so sorry you are going through this.   It is NOT helpful when people put you into a box, or tell you things that aren't true.  It makes the world feel even more crazy than it is.

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