November 2009-Starting Chemo

Melinda41- Glad your fairy came. I dread getting jammed up and eat lots of prunes, raisins, sultanas  mangoes lately and I've been going ok.

BrendaSharon - My AC is Adriamycin 120mg and cyclophosphamide (Cytoxan) 1200mg with sofran and dexmethsone for nausea.

The Adriamycin comes in two big red syringes ( look like they are meant for horses) The Chemo nurse pushes the stuff in with her thumb, the other stuff is an intravenous drip.

Huggs to all the other girls!!

Day 4 and doing ok.  They say only take the nausea tablets if you need them. I do need them but they are doing the job so far.

Livelife,  Thanksgiving is the 28th this year.  It's always the 4th Thursday of November.

No, we aren't celebrating separating from England.    The pilgrims who came over here had a long, harsh first winter and half of them died.  Native Americans helped them to survive and when they had a bountiful harvest the next year, they invited the Natives to eat with them.

Our holiday is based on that harvest dinner, and we eat traditional foods that was available during the 1600s.  We eat turkey, cranberry, sweet potatoes, mashed potatoes and a variety of other things that have become traditional and are unique to each familly.

It's a time when family and friends gather to eat together.  And, traditionally you invite somebody who is far from home or has no family if you can.  You will find lots of families who take in members of the military who are not near home, or people from other countries who are ex-pats.

It is the only non-commercial holiday left.  No sales, not promotion.  Just food, family and a football game. 

Melinda, I too am glad your fairy came.  I remember the difficulty I had after surgery and I want to prevent that with chemo!  Who knew we would talk about such things?  

Is it wrong that I'm looking forward to taking a steroid?    I am pretty energy-less these days - it''d be nice to have some.  My boss has asked me to come in to work to do something for her that she thinks nobody else can - the only day I can do it is the day before chemo.  Hopefully, the steroid won't get me too wired.

I bought another wig.  I like the styles by "Forever Young" and they are cheap and get good reviews.  I took a chance and ordered this one:

I know, I know, I think I'm 25.  I have never had long hair and cannot resist the chance!   

I think I skipped a page so I'll go back and check.  Have a nice evening girls.

Can someone please send the poo fairie my way?! Having not gone since Monday morning is making me a tad cranky. I'm upping my fiber and taking 2 colase, but alas, no action. Melinda, I too get a little motion sickness. Almost fell into the washing machine!

Ann, I love the wig!

I'm not quite sure what to do...mentally, I've prepared myself to have my hairdresser cut my hair really short this week.  It's currently down to my shoulder blades.  However, one of my girls is very distressed about it.  She is 16.  It HAS to be done, and soon, but I don't want to scar her.  So, do I go to the shop with my sister and just come home with the cut and switch on to scarves, etc. OR do I pray that my hair will last another week and wait until they go back to school on Monday to have it cut?! 

The reality is that I do have cancer and I am going to lose my hair soon as I'm just days away from my second chemo treatment.  Everyone will have to accept how it is...I was counting on my first few wig days being Thanksgiving because family is here and I thought I'd feel more confident being around people who would support me emotionally the first few times I wore a wig...

What do you think?

Sherri ~ my daughter is 15 ... she too was very upset PRE-the hair fallout.  One day she was just real cranky and nasty.  She wound up crying and telling me she didn't want my hair to fall out.  HECK neither did I.  I can tell you.  It started falling out and we buzzed it off as a family on Tuesday.  They were a bit weirded out at first.  Although we did have a few laughs.  By today, we went to Costco and I wore just a pink bandada.  (figuring the pink would let everyone know what the story was) lol  And both my kids were fine.  I didn't even feel like I was getting funny looks or anything.  So while it does stink and is a definate adjustment for the kids.  I told them it is just a bad side effect to making mommy all better by Spring.  AND when the flowers are blooming hopefully so will our hair. 

Big hugs girls !!!  Cafelovr...  Hoping the poop fairy comes your way !!!  Try some Miralax for the non-pooping it works wonders, or Senokot. 

Hi Sherri,

I don't have daughters, only sons.  My youngest is 12 and hair was his concern too.  You know, at these teen years they think their parents reflect on them, and it's hard for them to have an oddity for a mom.  I also think that losing hair makes it real - it could symbolize the fear of losing you, if they have any.  (My boys don't, but girls are more sensitive.)

Anyway, with boys, her is what i did - I am buying the wigs in advance.  I have one now and the one I posted above that I ordered.  I've told them how fun it's going to be to finally have long hair (shoulder length is as long as mine grows) and I've worn the one I have in front of them - once out to dinner.  So, I eased them into the idea of seeing me differently. 

For your daughter I would include her in the visit to the salon.  Make it fun if you can - go have a girls lunch, look through short hairstyles in the books, pick one and have the stylist copy it.  It won't really matter for long if she does a good job, right?  And, it might make your daughter feel better about it if she has a say and you make it a positive experience.  Also, if you are planning on wearing a wig or hat, why not take her shopping too?  Let her be part of it - I wouldn't do it while she's at school- you don't want her to come home to a surprise.

Her reaction is probably just fear and I always think easing fear doesn't mean hiding them away, but including them.

I don't know if I'm going to cut my hair short or just let it fall out.  I probably won't know until I get there.  I absolutely can't even imagine myself bald - it's such a weird thought.

Thanks for the compliments on the wig ladies.  Just keep in mind - it'll be my face under that fabulous hair.  LOL. 

You guys are scaring me with your taxotere comments!  It seems like most people are feeling bad after day three of chemo - well, day three for my second treatment will be Christmas Day!

Brenda, sounds like you got a migraine. 

Hi ladies

I'm new to this site and am pretty nervous about the whole posting thing (its totally new to me, unless you count facebook). I've been living with cancer since April, but at every turn there seems to have been more bad news to add. I've known that I would have to have chemo since the end of September.

What started off as DCIS in my left breast, became extensive DCIS is both breasts, which then became IDC. I've had a lumpectomy, a bilateral mastectomy, and an axillary node dissection.

I've just had my first chemo treatment on November 18th and am already finding that everyday brings something new to the table of side effects. I'll be on AC every 3 weeks for 4 cylcles, then TT every 3 weeks for 4 more cycles. Then I will continue with the Herceptin for another 9 cycles. I've been feeling quite queasy and tired since the treatment, but its been manageable. The drugs have been working pretty well, so long as I take them regularly. Today, taste has started to become affected. Everything tastes awful. The first mouthful of food is fine, but then it just turns off - almost metallic. I heard this might happen, but I didn't expect it so soon. There is a constant bad taste too, not just when I'm eating. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to deal with this? 

I'm getting a port on December 1st and I'm not convinced its the right thing to do. I've read on some of your posts that many of the more slender gals have trouble with them... do you all think that the good outweighs the bad in this case?  Please let me know your thoughts.

Mostly, I'm just scared of the unknown. Scared of feeling lousy and losing my hair and not being able to do all my usual everyday stuff like take care of my kids. I, like many of you, have wonderful family and friends to support me, but its not quite the same as having friends who really know what you're going through. So that's one of the main reasons why I joined this site.

I have 2 kids, a daughter age 8 and a son age 6. They have been great throughout, but of course I worry about them. I have thought about looking into support groups for kids with parents with cancer... but I don't want them to start worrying about all of this if they're not actually worried yet. I wonder how you know?

my cancer is IDC, Stage 2, grade 3, 3/8 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2+ 

Thanks to all for sharing your stories and your wisdom. I hope to get to know you all over this crazy journey.

Good morning all.  I feel more like myself this morning.  Like a real person, not as much like a sick person.  I had a great Sunday with my husband.  We did a bit of hiking and he was so supportive.  Any time the trail became uneven he held my hand to steady me.  It was so nice.  He said he was proud of my for not giving up and powering through the not so good moments.  I total used way to much of my energy yesterday but it was so worth it.  After we got home last night I had a quick shower, bowl of cereal and was in bed by 7pm.  The hubby did all the dishes and laundry for us before coming to bed last night.  How sweet. 

Some days I feel like all I ever do is eat and post on the computer and then I look back and it is as if I am never  here.  How everyone is doing good.  Sorry to be so rushed but I should get to work.  Hope everyone is going to have a great Thanksgiving.  Love and Kisses to all.

((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Love Kimmy

Mabelle/Ann~ sorry to Welcome you to our group, meaning I sure wish you did not have to be here.  BUT, I will tell you the wealth of information, compassion and caring for one another here really makes some crappy days much better.  We are here for you !!  I understand your feelings of it just keeps getting worse.  I felt the same way.  And being the mother of young children is so scary too.  Mine are older then yours.  Just remember kids are resilient.  I talked to their teachers so they would know if they seemed off.  I offer days off from school if they seem out of sorts and amazingly neither of them has had to miss a day yet.  They sure hate chemo as much as me.  They don't like seeing mommy sick, but when it passes and I rally again they are relieved.  The metallic taste I haven't experienced yet and do not look forward to it.  You need to really rinse your mouth.  Some girls use water/salt/baking soda mix, others use the Biotene mouthwash.  Using plastic silverware has been recommended to cut the metal taste when eating. 

Coolbreeze ~ my kids a week ago insisted I wear a wig..  now I walk around the house bald.  I say I am their alien mommy, we laugh.  Yesterday I went out with just a dorag and they were fine with it.  WHEW.  GIRL 98 lbs.  I wish...  I haven't weighed that since about 28 years old.  Now I am FLUFFY.  I thought chemo would drop 20 for me, NOT looking like it at all.  In fact may add 20 I don't need.  Oh well will give me something to do when this is over ~ Get to the gym !!!

Hope everyone had a good weekend.  Not sure if we have anyone going for chemo today.  If we do. HUGS for a smooth SE free TX!

I am so, so happy for those of you that are doing well. I really do mean it.

And I am so angry with myself.  My onc nurse keeps telling me not to compare myself with everyone else but I just can't help it.  I am in tears right now.  My first Tx was 11/17. AC every 2 weeks for 4 TX.  Then 12 weekly TX of Taxol.

I don't know if I can do this.  I've had no appetite since 11/18 - at this point just trying to stay hydrated.  The Cytolan headache will not go away.  They have given me hydrocodone which just makes me sleep.  When I'm awake and in an upright position the head hurts so badly - I can hardly see.  Onc nurse told me next Tx she will definitely drip Cytoxan over 90 mins.

Nausea kicked in Friday night - the Emend worked until then.  I'm sure the empty stomach is not helping with the nausea but everything DH tries to make for me just makes me want to puke. I keep some saltines on hand and they do help a bit.

I have no energy.  I am anemic and have been on iron tabs since a month before chemo began.  My numbers have not gone up.  Onc Doc said we may have to do iron infusions and that may help with my energy level.

Yesterday morning I woke up with the hair on the left side of my head broken off and very frizzy.  I sleep on my left side so I guess that's why the left side was affected first. Note: even though I was an English major 50 million years ago I never could remember the difference between 'affected' and 'effected'.

I have dropped 5 lbs since last Tuesday and that's not a good thing for me.  I've got to find something I can eat and keep down.

I try to do a few things around the house so that everything is not on my husband.  I guess the main problem is my 84 year old mother lives with us.  She is heading into dementia and has not been a very nice person for the last year or so.  I don't know if she truly doesn't understand or chooses to act this way.  She does nothing but sit in her recliner 23 out of 24 hours a day.  She expects DH and I to wait on her hand and foot.  When she demanded that I do something for her yesterday and I told her I would get Larry she screamed at me that I was just lazy. And her ultimate put down yesterday was 'you look like you're 75 years old' - said in a nasty tone not a concerned tone. (I'm 57 and the picture you see of me was taken about 6 months ago)  Really made me feel good. Her doctors have told her, my uncle has told her, my husband has told her and I have told her what I am going thru.  It doesn't seem to matter.  I have one brother who is a total asshole.  Lives about 10 miles away and she sees him about 2 or 3 times a year - his birthday and Christmas - just when it's time for her to write him a check.  He can't even be bothered to remember her birthday - doesn't send a card - doesn't call.  He calls her once every 6 or 7 weeks and stays on the phone 3 or 4 minutes.  He has never once offered to take her off our hands for even a weekend - you see he's much, much too busy.  And of course my mother thinks he walks on water.  Little does she know the last time I called him to let him know she was in the hospital his response was " Well is she dying? Because we're out on our boat with our friends and I can't get there until tomorrow".   Oh yes - he does know I'm going thru chemo - my DH has a business relationship with my brother's mother-in-law and the woman's a big time gossip.

Sorry - I'm just so down right now and this f-ing headache makes me want to crawl under a rock and die. I'm sure that rant was unnecessary.

I'm so tired of well meaning friends telling me that so and so had chemo and they didn't have any problems.  Almost makes me feel that they don't believe me - which makes me stay away from them.  My Onc nurse told me to ask them where they got their medical degree from but I'm not an in your face type of person.

I'm so sorry to be such a downer - I'm angry at my body - I went into this with the best possible attitude - and my body is betraying me.

Thanks, Melinda.

We started out with the sudafed and it didn't touch it so that's why they gave me the script for the hydrocodone.  I'm afraid if they give me something stronger I'll just be in bed 24/7.  But I am going to call.

Thanks for the hugs. It means a lot.

Sue

Hi ladies!

I was diagnosed with breast cancer on October 19th_ I was absolutely devastated! I was living in London, England and was planning to start a new life with my family in Singapore in December.

We brought the move forward- with kids in tow, and decided that I should have my treatment here.

The last couple of weeks have been a blur. I am having pre-adjuvant chemo to shrink my 2x3 cm tumour, so that I can avoid a mastectomy! Have had my first round of chemo...and so far the only symptoms I have had are occasional feelings of tiredness and slight feelings of nausea. (Reading through some of the posts, I should count myself lucky!). Hubby is worried that the drugs might not be working! Is there anyone else out there whose symptoms have not been as bad as expected? My oncologist however,has warned me that my hair will definitely be falling out around the beginning of December- but I am prepared with wig in hand!

It's nice to know that I'm not alone in this fight.