Daily Show/Barbara Ehrenreich

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kira66715
kira66715 Member Posts: 4,681
edited June 2014 in Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts

I just watched the interview with Jon Stewart where Barbara Ehrenreich talked about how relentless positive thinking while she was experiencing treatment for breast cancer was not helpful for her. 

 She said she was told to embrace it, it would make her more highly evolved, and instead she just came out nastier.

She wrote a book about it: Bright-Sided

http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/wed-october-14-2009/barbara-ehrenreich

Very timely, for me, during this month of pink.

Jon Stewart kept saying, "Don't they mean well?" And she kept saying "I just wanted to experience my reality."

Kira 

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  • lovemyfamilysomuch
    lovemyfamilysomuch Member Posts: 1,585
    edited October 2009

    Thanks for posting this Kira.  She made a number of good points.  I had friends who encouraged me to "stay positive" but I appreciated much more those friends and family who were willing to accept ALL my feelings, even the negative ones.  It's about balance.  In sisterhood, xo

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  • Sido
    Sido Member Posts: 234
    edited October 2009

    I too have friends who mean well, but use the "think positively" mantra to censor me whenever I refer to myself as "sick" or express any fear or anger over my diagnosis or treatment.  I keep being told stories about how wonderfully positive someone they knew was, and how it saved their lives.  I felt as if my negative feelings and words would kill me and it was my fault if it did,  I "had to be positive" or else. 

    I've pre-ordered Ehrenreich's book (hopefully arriving Monday) and can't wait to read it.

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  • MeredithK02
    MeredithK02 Member Posts: 86
    edited October 2009

    I also saw that episode and really enjoyed it.  She wrote an article for Harper's about her experience that I think it great: http://bcaction.org/index.php?page=welcome-to-cancerland-2.

    October's only halfway over and I'm already pink-ribboned-out.

     I'm on the wait list at the library for Ehrenreich's new book! 

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  • pabbie
    pabbie Member Posts: 370
    edited October 2009

    Hi-I was listening to the Jon Stewart show as my husband was watching it. I was relating to what she (Barbara E.) was saying and it caught my attention.

    Gosh, after my 1st cancer for colo-rectal in 1999, "being positive" was all I ever heard. The more positive you are the chances are the cancer won't come back. I read NUMEROUS positive thinking books. I was being referred to as "Mary Poppins." I do like the movie but I guess I was getting a little too "not real".

    I agree w/ Lovingmyfamilysomuch in that we need balance. Because after my BC dx in 2008 I didn't want anything to do w/ positive thinking. I even got majorly depressed and I am still trying to keep my head above water.

    Thanks for listening-I think BALANCE is MY answer. Take care of yourselves.

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  • NancyD
    NancyD Member Posts: 3,562
    edited October 2009

    Just my opinion, but relentless positive feelings in the face of a deadly disease would be grounds for a mental evaluation. There's no shame in being sad, scared, or even going to a dark place when faced with cancer, at least for some time.

    Finding the "balance" is partly knowing who you can vent to. I've had to be more guarded around certain friends about my condition. I know they don't want to hear how bad it really was. But I use that to my advantage by seeing them when I feel I need a distraction. And when I need to be honest and talk about my fears, I have a few, close relatives who really understand.

    I have to say it's a balancing act more than a balanced existence.

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  • AnnNYC
    AnnNYC Member Posts: 4,484
    edited October 2009

    I love Barbara Ehrenreich -- that "Welcome to Cancerland" article that Meredith mentioned is something I've re-read many times: http://www.barbaraehrenreich.com/cancerland.htm

    Interesting point in her new book: that the whole "power of positive thinking" and "banishing negative thoughts" trend is what led to our present financial crisis!  People in charge at banks or mortgage lenders or hedge funds also bought into the idea that if they "believed" the bubble would keep expanding, it would never burst!

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  • kira66715
    kira66715 Member Posts: 4,681
    edited October 2009

    Ann, what an article!~ thank you for posting the link. 

    It's brilliant, IMO. And I could relate to so much of what she wrote--about the cult and the teddy bears, and survivorship.

    I loved Nickled and Dimed, and will order this book.

    Kira 

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  • RunswithScissors
    RunswithScissors Member Posts: 323
    edited October 2009

    I loved Jon's term for it - "irrational exuberance".  

    I agree that the most damaging part of this concept is that when something undesirable happens, it's your fault because you "attracted" it.  It's just more blame-the-victim.

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