Motivation

Go Allie!!

Brendatrue: hear you, I just had to sit down with my boss and take a little off my plate, and you're right no one else wants to hear it.  Plus, just sent an e-mail off to someone I was working wiht on another project and said listen, have 3 deadlines next week, if this isn't going to happen lets put it on hold now and I'll concentrate on the other 2.  Tired and cranky because I'm tired today, I need a good 9-11 hours of sleep right now compared to hte 5-7 I got by on before.  That is not helping me get caught up with work for sure. Got a quick run in before work yesterday, so came home and did some soothing yoga.  Helped me last night, sure could use a good dose of it this AM!

Kari played the cancer card to rid herself of a cooky woman!!

Girl, I say use what you got!! This friggin' cancer must be good for something!!! LOL.

I have been poorly last 2 days, the ebb and flow of healing I guess. no walking. Tomorrow a mile. Please, just one mile. Please body, let me do just one mile!!!

Those of you will strong, healthy, working bodies, MOVE!! Don't waste it!!!

Spring. 

Deanna: the waking up at night because you're keeping yourself hydrated thing, yes, know it well.  I've tried drinking less in the evening then keeping a bottle of water by my bed, because if I do drink less I wake up thirsty.  At least then can lean over drink and go back to sleep.  I was having problems sleeping anyway, chemopause, Tamox hotflashes etc haven't helped at all.

Kari, Spring described that interaction very well.  Funny you mention that, little ashamed of myself, but playing that card myself next weekend to get out of a work obligation a little early.  Then I realize how much of my Saturday its sucking up and don't feel so bad. : )

Anyone else hitting this point?  I had terrible myopathy with the taxotere.  My legs would shake so bad I had to hang on to the rail for dear life when going up and down stairs.  (Won't even get into to the stupid freakin neuropathy).  It is sllooooowwwwly improving.  The hard part with the myopathy is pushing it makes it worse.  So used to pushing it a little with exercise making you stronger, but this does the opposite.  (Totally sick and tired of people telling me that its a good life lesson because I finally found something that mind over matter doesn't work for and I can't just work harder and push through. )  I never stopped exercising during chemo, but each round got weaker and weaker.  So, finally feeling like I'm back in shape a bit.  But the muscles aren't keeping up.  It's my limiting factor right now.  the lungs want to push harder, the muscles set me back every time I do.  Anyone else dealing with this?  I switch out running/walking, rowing, elliptical, yoga and weightlifting.  Still hit points like yesterday where I have to take a day off because I can tell my legs are back-tracking.   It drives me nuts.  Maybe I need to put some meditation in my exercise routine? 

So...cancer card is ok when dealing with cooky people and greedy people!  LOL!!!!  Thanks for the stories, they made me chuckle!!  Got in another walk last night to blow off some steam and felt better afterward, although my low back right hip was softly sobbing...haha

Spring, you poor thing, you want so bad to be at your pre-surgery level and you will get there, just slowly, you sound like me...push push even when I know it will be bad for my hip, etc....(I am a bad student for my PT) LOL! 

Deanna, whatever the reason for your good sleep, I wish you could bottle it and send some over!!  haha  I too, am waking up less because of the decreased water consumption, but still waking and getting up through the night, this a.m. I did NOT want to get up for work, but I did.  I've just been wanting to eat eat eat lately too....maybe its the nicer weather, but my pants are fitting tighter!  Thinking of you for your upcoming surgery, hugs!

Allie, Yosemite!!  YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Good to hear Springie!!

Yeah Spring, I love yoga too

Kari, hear you on the insomnia, and the tighter pants.  I'm hoping I've just "put on muscle" from the exercising, but..... (no pun intended)

I'm feeling lonely here, no one else dealing with muscle myopathy from chemo? 

Meg, we have had snow for a few days now. Wake up and there is just a skiff of snow, by mid day it is gone, but come morning again, snow. None this morning but it looks cold. Our trees haven't even dropped their leaves yet and the geese are still hanging around. not sure what that all means.

Kmmd- I didn't have chemo so no muscle myopathy. Had the ooph though and this morning had a bit of trouble getting the lower limbs to like me. Haven't had too many muscle issues recently until this morning, so while I can sympathize with you I do not truly know what you are going through. I do hope it gets better.

Spring- I understand you want to get right back where you were before your surgery, just don't forget to listen to your body and stop when it says too. We don't want to see you have any set backs.

Allie have a wonderful trip.

Kari, I was having some difficulty with sleep as well ever since the ooph. Since I need to take calcium anyway, my sister got me on to this Bob's Best Coral Callcium along with a few other supplements (yes I am finally coming around to that way of thinking) anyway, ever since taking that I have found I sleep better. I still have to get up in the night to pee but I can go back to sleep instead of getting up and watching tv or playing on the puter until I get sleepy again . I take it 3 times a day with one being before bed.

Anyway hi to all others. Haven't seen Joy . Mum or Helena for awhile.

Have a great weekend all, it is our Thanksgiving weekend so we will be filling up on turkey soon.

Must try to get some exercise in here somewhere! 

pk0199: sorry to hear that, is it melting in between time or is that snow accumulating already?  brrr

Meg, yeah, the DaVinci thing is robot assisted apparatus, apparently cutting edge. Just was wondering.!!!

I just have a CD that I got from my Yoga teacher and put it on my iPod... I highly recommend Yoga. I find it very physcially restorative, and it is a great way to focus on the mind, body, spirit connection! 

dlb823: thank you, although if you're still noticing it a little a year out I have a long time to go. Just good to know it will get better.  DH and I decided "that shouldn't happen at the dose you've gotten" belonged with "the check is in the mail" we actually joke and use it pretty frequently now. 

Myopathy from taxotere happens to about 5-7% of women who get it, even for the TC times 4 doses that BC patients get.  It effects long proximal muscles like upper leg and arm muscles the most (especially leg).  They don't know if it is a direct effect on the muscle or damage to nerves going to the muscles, nor do they know if it is the taxotere or the steroids in combination with the taxotere that causes the damage.  They do know if they do muscle biopsies that they will find damage.  You can find studies telling you that much, just very few telling how long it takes and how many completely recover.  My Onc and the nurses could tell me that overuse of the muscles makes it worse. I find it so very frustrating.  Especially when days I'm on my feet a lot at work, it cuts into how much I can exercise at home.  Which is a problem, because although work can be exhausting at times, it doesn't keep me fit nor does it help get the weight off.  So, when I can't exercise as much after a long day without making things worse Im in a real pickle.

Oh well, this is supposed to be the motivating, not the whining thread.  Thanks for letting me know you were experiencing it too, helps to know someone else is going through it.  Plus, I appreciate you telling me about your leg aches, I've started to worry about mets my hip bothers me so much, the taxotere is a much more likely culprit and that takes a load off my mind.  

I did not have Taxotere, I had Taxol - but I remember a period where I could not raise myself from a squat - it was like my quad muscles had gone to sleep or weren't "engaging". At some point this seems to have resolved. 

I don't know if it is the same thing you all are talking bout or not. It was very odd!! I remember thinking, WTH? I did get pian from Taxol in my leg muscles (it seemed to travel) at certain points in the chemo cycle. I didn't have any reactions to the Neulasta.

Deanna, I can't imagine our ONC had never heard of these quite common symptoms prior! Maybe he is of the mind that if you don't tell people they won't look for it. But after they complain about it, to dismiss it is, well, to me, that is not fair.!!!!  makes us think we're nutz or odd, when it is practically "normal".  

Had to kind of laugh at that, if it doesn't put you in the ED not enough to mention.  You're probably right, they see so much over the years that the rest seems like noise to them. Spring, yeah, love that denial.  I came to the conclusion that most Onc's and NP's are in denial and don't hear a lot of what we say.  I think its a protective mechanism.  If they really understood all we go through they wouldn't be able to treat anymore, and then where would we all be.  So, get the denial, just can't stand the dismissiveness that goes with it. I think a few in our area were surprised I went with an Onc that was younger.  I picked her because she LISTENS, I'm convinced she thinks Im nuts at times but she still always listens to me. 

Having a hard time decided what to do to work out today.  I really should try to get a little running in (believe me, nobody but me would call it running), after the breakfast I had today I could stand some calorie burning, but truthfully a nice long yoga session sounds like a lot more fun.  Maybe I'll compromise, do a little bit of time on the treadmill then do the yoga which is what I really want to do. Anyone ever do any poweryoga?  I don't like it as much as my other yoga dvd's but it does get you moving. 

Hi, all--I've been prioritizing my needs for the last few days, and getting more rest than usual was at the top of the list. I did manage to work out at least 30 minutes each day; today I squeaked by with about 50 minutes, walking and using a weighted bar to work out upper body while walking. Meg, I have never heard of kettlebells and will have to do a little research on that one. First post-dx mammo--well, it can be tough, for sure. I'll stay hopeful that the outcome reaffirms you are well.

Ah, yes, the muscle myopathy experience. I had the most effect in my quads; I would feel them shaking like crazy. I finished T/C in May, and I have noticed gradual improvement so I am hopeful the improvement will continue. I think my situation is worsened by my Vit D3 deficiency; I have been on additional D3 for a couple of years and my D3 has been slow to rise. I started noticing some muscle weakness around the time I started taking Arimidex a few years ago, and I finally realized the AI was mercilessly attacking my joints while the low D3 was decreasing my muscle stability. I needed this thread then! I would go for a 20-30 minute walk and feel like crying the entire time; I was afraid I would just collapse but I was determined to keep trying. At least the tamoxifen does not have the same effects on me as the AI did (still staying hopeful after almost 2 months), and I don't feel so desperate while trying to work out. Interesting how we can find gratitude nowadays, isn't it?

Deanna--I am thinking of you and hoping for the best on Monday! During chemo, I had terrible pains in both thumbs and also in my wrists. Med Onc: What, thumb and wrist pain? I can't imagine that would be related to chemo! Thank goodness I learned how to trust myself about my body years ago and don't depend on others' validation in order to maintain my sanity.

Spring--I'm glad you recovered quickly from your 2 mile adventure and that you are feeling good about what you're doing now. Allie--A trip to Yosemite? I hope you had a blast and came back wonderfully rejuventated. Helena--I hope your squeaky foob continues to settle down; it sounds like you are adjusting well and finding your way back to running. I imagine the prospect of no more surgery is enticing.

kmmd--I think my med onc has to really work hard with me! I am always prepared with questions, concerns, etc, and thankfully he listens and seems to take my concerns seriously. Sometimes I wonder what he really thinks, but getting what I need is what really matters. I've also quit expecting him to be perfect, and that has helped me a great deal, too.

I don't know what this is called but I had such excruciating shin pains during chemo, that they would wake me up during the night (they are not as bad now).  I went to my onc and said I wanted a bone scan because I was sure the pain was from mets.  It was the only time her nurse practitioner admitted something was from the chemo.  Everything else I raised "not from chemo"---to the point that I would bring in articles to show that the chemo could cause my symptom.  I do not think that patients imagine side effects they don't have and I do not understand the need not to simply reassure us.  My rads onc was the opposite----I'd go in and say I was fine and he'd ask "did you have nausea? did you have fatigue?"  He prepared me for anything that might happen and I had very few rads side effects. Since I did not get imaginary side effects because I was told what might happen, I don't understand why my onc was in a state of constant denial.