I Just Don't Know!!

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TLF
TLF Member Posts: 14
edited June 2014 in Not Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastases but Concerned

I am soooo concerned. I went in for my 1st mammogram in August (turned 40 in April) to find out that I had breast cancer in my right breast. I had no signs, symptoms, lumps, bumps, history or anything; I go in and it is there. I had a radical mastectomy with immedate reconstruction and find out that 5/26 lymphnodes are positive. Rightn now I am dx at Stage IIb. But here is the scary part. I really think that when I go to the oncologist I will be raised to Stage IV.

Why? Because last May I was feelingin numbness in my arm, went to the ER for an MRI and they found a spot. Neurologist has watched that spot for an entire year to see if there was any change in the size before he would make the decision to do anything, with no change. I was praising God thinking that it may just be a spot from an old injury or fall that was never detected.

I just got in from having a chest x-ray and blood work done to see if it had spread to the lungs and liver.  I got a chance to look at the x-ray and it didn't look right to me. There was a bunch of fuzzy lines on each side of the lung, I asked the tech what that was and she stated blood vessels. Of course I came home and looked up images of lungs with mets on the internet and mine looked very close to what I saw. I want to cry.

I am single mother of a 12 year old son. Before I was dx I had prayed and prayed to give me 50 years to see my son grow up and spend quality time with my grandkids and great-grands. My parents died at a relatively young age (Mom, 55 and Dad, 76). I pray that I am able to out live both of their ages. I have always wanted to live until I was old and gray. 

Please keep me in your prayers that my body will be cleansed of this terrible disease and I will be able to live to see my child grow up.  

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  • Sukiann
    Sukiann Member Posts: 310
    edited October 2009

    TLF, I will keep you in my prayers.  But, please don't make up your mind without seeing the doctor first.  Remember, we are not doctors (although I think I am sometimes) and what you see may be nothing.  I know how you are feeling though.  Every ache and pain I have I think I have mets too.  It is a very difficult way to live.  Has your oncologist checked out the spot on your arm?  The waiting is so hard, I know. As a parent it is even harder when we look at our kids and know how much they need us.  Please let us know what is going on.  (((hugs))))

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  • califsun
    califsun Member Posts: 20
    edited October 2009

    I pray that you will be ok...I know It's really hard not to worry but we can drive ourselfs and our family nuts over this. I had my one year MRI today after having a double mass last year...and now I'm waiting for the results and I'm trying not to think about it but it's always right there in the back of my mind...I try not to talk about it too much to my dh because he's really been there for me and I hate to worry him but not talking about it makes me grouchy...so what's worse? Good luck with your results and may God be with you through all this

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  • candie1971
    candie1971 Member Posts: 4,820
    edited October 2009

    TLF, my prayers are with you. I too live with fear. Good luck with your results and we are always here for you.

    hugs and prayers

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  • TLF
    TLF Member Posts: 14
    edited October 2009

    Well, I got the results of my chest x-ray, blood test and BRAC test all three came back negative for lung mets, abnormal liver function, and no mutation. Thank you Father. I see the Onc on October 23 and at that time I suppose I will have a bone scan and what other test. He will also determine my treatment plan.  Keep me in your prayers that everything will go well. I have faith in God and I KNOW that he will see me through this.

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  • Sukiann
    Sukiann Member Posts: 310
    edited October 2009

    Hooray!  Now on to your treatment plan.  So happy for you!

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  • TLF
    TLF Member Posts: 14
    edited October 2009

    Thank you all for encouraging words. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers as I start my journey through treatment. What is the typical (I know it is different for each) steps to prepare and how long is treatment?  Tests? Treatment Plan? Port? Then how long for treatment, after the port insertion heals? 

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  • Christine2000
    Christine2000 Member Posts: 176
    edited October 2009

    TLF-- I had my port inserted in the morning and my first chemo that afternoon! Chemo for me was 5 months, but I also did chemo first and then surgery--now I am healing from surgery and starting radiation in about 2 weeks. 

    Christine 

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