Friend Just Had Double Mastectomy

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lessica
lessica Member Posts: 3
edited June 2014 in Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts

My friend just had a double mastectomy and we're trying to be there for her and her family as much as we can.. I can't even imagine what she's going through and I'm sure it will hit her hard at some point in time.

 Any ideas on how I can help.. is the only thing I can do is listen to her? What's the best thing to do to give her support?

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  • Gumpertee
    Gumpertee Member Posts: 1
    edited October 2009

       Hi, you are a good, caring friend for her,

     I had a double mast. 15 days ago.  Most helpful things done for me:

      * women who had already been there,done that offered their support to answer quesstions, listen to me cry or vent, and just be available any time .

      * cards & notes of encouragement in the mail every day (more than Christmas!)

      * honest offers to pray for and with me.

      * Prepared food brought to my house: if called & offered a day in advance, gave me something to anticipate.  Person who helps you has enough to do caring for your meds, hygeine, etc.

      * Patient probably will not be able to shampoo or shower for perhaps 2 weeks.  A good product from drugstorre is called   Psssst !    It is a shampoo-in-a-can, not the real thing, but a good substitute that can remove oil & sweat, and fluff it up a bit Later, a trip to hirdresser would be FAB

       * a FUNNY video or DVD to watch.  I was too fuzzy-brained for the first week to read, so to sit &  laugh mindlessly was a good diverssion from thinking  about what next?'

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  • HelenaJ
    HelenaJ Member Posts: 1,133
    edited October 2009

    Hi Lessica, how lovely to be writing here and asking things you can do to help your friend.  ((hugs))

    I had a bilateral mastectomy in December last year.  Suggestions:  help with the housecleaning, cooking, driving, babysitting children (if she has any) anything that can lessen her load.  I was very independant and stubborn when help was offered so if you live nearby pop in and insist.  She will be very sore and have limited movement for a few weeks.  She may also need to go to doctors appointments so you can offer to drive her.  Also check in on her husband and children (if she has any) to see if they need any help. 

    Also if she is a reader lend her some books or magazine or even DVDs as it helps occupy the mind.

    And of course listen, how wonderful if you can do that.   You say "the only thing" but it is probably more beneficial than all the housecleaning ever could be.

    you are a fantastic friend and I wish her all the best in her healing and recovery

    big hugs

    Helena

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  • melissa-5-19
    melissa-5-19 Member Posts: 391
    edited October 2009

    She is lucky to have you and I hope I have a friend as kind and thoughtful as you are when it is my turn- not sure buut probably around the corner.

    All the suggestions above sound good to me and Ladies- I am so independent that I had not thought of MOST of them- thanks again for opening my eyes!

    LOVE YOU ALL -IN THE REAL SENSE OF THE WORD.

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