Advice and Encouragement

sarahes
sarahes Member Posts: 2
edited June 2014 in Just Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastasis

My mom was recently diagnosed with mets 2 years after being diagnosed with breast cancer.  She broke her hip and that's how they discovered it was in her femur, sternum and ribs.  These past few weeks have been hell. She is finishing her second week of radiation and it seems to be making her so tired. More than the chemo ever did.  Is this normal?  The doctors don't seem very optimistic. They said hope for 5 years but don't expect more than 3.  Is this normal as well?  Do they tell this to all women or is this specifically my mom?  I know there are many women who live metastatic for 10+ years after diagnosis.  If anyone can tell me what their experience has been, it would really help me.  Thank you so much!

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  • sarahes
    sarahes Member Posts: 2
    edited October 2009

    I forgot to mention that my mom is triple negative.  I imagine that changes what is "normal" as it decreases treatment options.

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited October 2009

    sarahes:  Actually triple negative responds very well to chemo.  I am sorry to hear about your mom, it's very scary when you are first diagnosed with mets.  For weeks I thought I didn't have much time left.  Then I realized...who is to say how long we have?  No one really knows.  My ONC told me the other day he had one breast cancer patient that he treated for 35 years.  Who is to say that might be your mom or me.

    Treatment is exhausting and then add the stress and fears that go along with it makes it hard.  I have learned to enjoy each day and plan on being around for along time.  Wishing the same for your mom.  I'm er/pr negative and her2 postive.

    Me 

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  • Mellaluka
    Mellaluka Member Posts: 28
    edited October 2009
    Hi Sarahes, my mum is HER2+ recently diagnosed with mets to lung. Her onc also told her 3 years as a figure. I think this is the published figures for median survival. I don't believe it and have found many many women on this site and others who are beating the odds. We too go day by day and try to make the most out of each day. We don't know whats around the corner for any of us good or bad. Best wishes to you & your mum Laughing
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  • LuAnnH
    LuAnnH Member Posts: 8,847
    edited October 2009

    I wish they would take the oncs that say things like that out into a field and shoot them!!!  There are no accurate stats on how long you can live with bc mets.  It really is so individual just like the cancer is. I have seen women pass away weeks after dx and I recently met a woman who is 30 years past her mets dx so it is hard to say how long she will live with the disease.  The only thing your onc can really say is that your mom will more than likely die of breast cancer, other than that he really has no clue when that will happen.

    Your mom is going to need tests to see if the cancer is anywhere else in her body and a biopsy to check it's status.  It can change its hormone and/or her2 startus from bc to mets.  So those tests will all need to be done.  Once they know that info they can start her tx.  Hopefully she will respond to tx!

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