Accountability in a police state.

Athena the Five new Angels thread is from a man who lost his wife who was battling breast cancer and taking care of 5 or 6 handicapped kids...She was on her way to a doctor appointment with 4 of those children when she and the children were killed instantly in a horrific crash......Norm as he is known by came here to try to find a path out of the darkness from that loss.....We (myself included) have helped him go on with his life and he even ahs adopted one or two more children.......he is not in any way creepy or any such thing..if you read his starting post you would find the whole sad tale...........

Madalyn, I DID Pm the Mods and ask where it went but I got no response......This was 2 weeks ago now.......

Its all good Gracie!  No worries.  Sometimes my panties are in a bunch too, depending on what time of day it is depends on what mood I am in.  And NOTHING and NO ONE can peredict what that will be~lol

That is soooooo GREAT!  THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!  YEAH BABY!

Ok sorry I will calm down now lol

If you feel the post was removed out of malice than please report it to the mods by email.  They WILL reinstate it if it is ok. 

errr, yes.  There  are some very odd things going on in the health threads.  But that is not the only place.

Yeah, I think they do. Don't take it personally, but the title of the thread is enough to know that it probably invited trouble. If you read the boards long enough and thoroughly enough, you know that someone is always going to stick their nose in regardless of your good intentions. It's definately not a "live and let live" kind of place, as much as I am sure the mods wish it would be.

Edited for spelling

Beesie, I agree, it's very upsetting to me that so many comments and so much information was lost.

What do people think about "locking" a thread?  Many bulletin boards do this when a thread has become too contentious -- people can't post on the topic anymore, but what has already been posted doesn't get deleted and can still be read (except for comments that were deemed unacceptable and were deleted).  Mind you, I'm talking about how some other boards are run.  Just curious what others here would think about "locking" threads.  I just think it's very sad that good, thoughtful comments get deleted.

Guess I'm depressed tonight, but -- you know -- life is impermanent enough, it is really hurting me that so many people's words got erased.

wanted to chime in here as an "oldbie" who reads and sometimes posts--who has met many of you; and loved all of you; and cried with and for too many.........this site was not avail when I was dx, surgery, chemo, rads--backed into it when I was researching Tamoxifen, after two years of taking what I thought was the drug from hell....I think when I logged in I was like 2,000+ joiner...4 or 5 threads....but, I immediately found anwers to my questions........there are now over 50,000+ registered users and 100+ threads to post on.    WOW--impressive growth.

I was in the live chat room first debut--and, what fun that was.......you think the discussion boards get a bit "rowdy" at times...you should have been in chat back then.  BUT, back then, we had Queen Judith who monitored the chat room and she'd pop in when things got kind of ugly and soothe the ruffled feathers........we had some good, interesting private chats and I miss her.....

I stick around here not only to cyberly follow what's going on with ladies I've met on-line or met at get-togethers, but also because even in just a few years, there have been advances/txs that didn't exist for me........and should I need it in the future--I want to be armed with all the info I can possibly have.

...sorry to run you all down my little memory trip, but just want to say how much I appreciate bc.org for providing a forum where I have met wonderful people; learned much; have had good times; laughed out loud......sincerely hoping that the moderators read my post and will consider that in their next update, will choose some other format than "delete a post" by the community.

sorry for rambling........hugggsssss to all....

Well.  An entire thread gone for a few bullies?  Hours of heartfelt discussion and researched information just ... gone?!?!  I'm truly gobsmacked.  But then again ...

I know probably the first person from these boards who got banned forever by the "community".  In her first year of treatment, in between surgeries and still trying to wrap her head around her dx, she was followed around by an ugly group who discovered that hitting that report this post button enough times would result in a post getting deleted.  Oh my gosh and holy mackeral ... the POWER.  The cowards never Knew such a thing!  Since removing posts by the "community" was relatively new, some others just assumed this person Must have done Something to have her posts removed by the "community".  Oh no my friends.  If she made a post, this circle gang got together and reported it enough to remove it.   She posted in a thread to a dying sister and this ugly group removed it!!!  She was being followed and harrassed.  Her "crime" was that she asked another "sister" to be accountable for a post that was full of lies about yet another sister.  This other sister was Named in the post.  OMG .. who did this newbie think she was, asking an oldbie to be truthful?!?   They showed her what happens when you don't drink the kool-aid.    Though her posts were reinstated time and time and time again, she had also been temporarily banned several times because of these posts that were unlawfully removed.  She ignored the gang as the moderators suggested and even started posting in a completely different forum.  But they followed her, harrassed her, and kept removing posts. Ironically they harrassed her publicly for ignoring them.  They got her.  She ended up permanently banned because of having had so many temporary bans prior.  The gang had nothing more happen to them then a slap on the wrist, if that, even though they broke the rules over and over ... harrassment, defamation, naming others in posts without their permission and reporting posts that didn't break any rules.   I'm sure there are more they broke but I don't have the rules right in front of me.  Emails written to the moderators asking how such a thing could happen to someone who was so obviously being harrassed (THEY had reinstated her posts for crying out loud) went unanswered.

She still reads the boards EVERY day.  BCO saved her sanity and gave her the knowledge she needed to help her in her decision making.  The support by MOST of the women was incredible and she found herself able to help others as well, which also helped her.  I've read a lot about posters trying to get a Stage 4 sister reinstated who was permanently banned because of needing support now that she's Stage 4. Mind you this Stage 4 sister was justly banned for repeated breaking of the rules.  Imagine being a newbie who is still trying to wrap her head around her dx and whether she'll live to see her babies grow up, and then trying to reconcile how a breast cancer SUPPORT board would allow an ugly gang to strip her utterly unfairly of said support.  That added another completely unneccessary layer of crap on top of an already huge pile that comes with getting breast cancer.

It saddens me to see that one can still have posts removed by the "community" and have their possibly Only support network potentially removed from them by cowards and bullies.  Although I've never posted there I have been reading the Healthcare threads with Great interest.  I would expect most of us are very interested and passionate about this topic that hits so close to home.  For the moderators to remove the entire threads is mind boggling.  Why not warn the troublemaking posters to behave and if they refuse then ban them from that thread or the entire board if they are a repeat offender.  But ONLY if they are breaking the Rules.  Censorship is an ugly word.

I expect this post will be deleted but I imagine at least some will get to read it before that happens so it was worth my time in writing it.  Something needs to be done but removing the good posts that someone took their precious time to write is Not the answer.

"It is not only what we do, but also what we do not do, for which we are accountable."

Moliere

As an aside but posting here because this very kind of ugliness and unfair moderation has kept her from coming here very much anymore, "lv2cmp" can use your best wishes, positive vibes and prayers.  I'm very saddened to report that she is in the hospital and has been told she is out of options and may have very little time left.  Thank you.  ((((((Amy))))))

Right.  If only we could all agree to disagree.  There should be no censorship on a cancer support board of all places.  But for those truly in violation of the rules and our "community" has shown time and time again their inability to make those decisions justly. 

You are right about Ames and I love her so much.  She is not one to get into the fray but when she sees complete injustice being done she will question it.  She did that for me on another board and even though she was Stage 4 she got banned there.  Simply because she questioned something privately to the moderator.   Later she was told she could come back any time but why would she want to?  Still, I would think it hurt her somewhat.  We're coping with cancer.  Who needs the crap?  

You know Ann, I've just written a 1/2 page post on the thread locking idea that I ended up deciding not to post once I previewed it. I just know someone was going to get pissy about it so, all I can say is in theory it's a great idea, but on this particular board...no, my very strong opinion is that it would not work. I'll keep the reasons for that opinion to myself.

Also, Blah, I am so sorry to hear about Amy. She was one of the first women to respond to me when I got my mets diagnosis in 2006. It's very sad to hear this.

Athena - thanks for your clarification on the type of Board status; I was merely curious as to the structure.  2 Moderators is not many on a Board with this much traffic. 

Blah - very sorry indeed to hear about your friend's difficulties.

 Junie - nice to meet you.  I am only a little way past being a newbie myself, and the info I have found here has been marvellous.

I think there are some really good, if divergent points on this thread this evening.

I think we are all agreed that a support site such as this is invaluable, that we should all be able to hold and express our individual views, but none of us want the bullies or just vitriol.

 So where next?

Blah, I am so sadden about lvtocmp amy, she was one of the first friends I made here and I also love her very much.  It is just too much.  I just hate this disease.  I just don't have any words for how sad it is.  She is just special.