Why does it take so long to find out??

New member here.  I finished treatment to my right breast (surgery, chemo, 33 rads) in April 2009.  It took me awhile to work up the nerve to self exam and when I did I felt a lump in that breast. My husband felt it, too.   I was so scared.  But I waited to say anything until my surgery to remove the port.  The surgeon felt it and when I asked if it were scar tissue he responded by asking if I had a mammogram scheduled.  I did for Aug. 25.  After that, I called the Breast Care Nurse at my cancer clinic and spoke at length to her.  She offered to move up the date but also went through records from my May oncologist visit where she felt something which seemed like scar tissue to her.  She's the one I trust most so I said I'd wait till my Aug. mammo date.  This past Thurs. I went back to the surgeon to have the port incision checked.  He immediately went to the right breast and started feeling around.  I again asked if he thought it was scar tissue and he said he didn't know.  His incliniation would be to excise it, send it to pathology, and take it from there--after I had the mammogram.  I asked why I wouldn't have a biopsy done first and he responded that he wouldn't want to chance that they miss the lump,  This startled me since the first time no one could feel it.  He told me not to make myself crazy and come back to see him in Sept.  Like a dutiful little patient, I left.  But as I was walking to my car I knew I'd be a basket case if I waited that long so I turned around and went to the Breast Care Clinic and asked to speak to the nurse.  When I told her my story, she slammed her hand on the desk and said I would have my mammogram that day if I didn't mind waiting.  And so I did.  Two times.  And an ultrasound.  It's not looking good.  There are three lumps, not one.  My nurse pulled strings and got me in for an MRI on Monday morning.

I am one freaked out 65 year old.  I don't understand how cancer could be back so soon after all that treatment.  I'm questioning my decision to have the lumpectomy.  I feel I let my vanity of holding on to that sagging breast put me into this situation.  Also, I didn't have a second opinion because I felt strongly confident in my caregivers.  But if this is the worst-case and it's malignant, I've told them I want to switch surgeons and I would want both breasts taken and no reconstruction.  My husband said his main consideration is that I live and he doesn't care whether I have breasts or not.  He just wants me.  He took such great care of me last time that I also feel guilty having to put him through all this again.  I don't know where I will find the courage to repeat  this again.  I'm afraid of the pain, afraid of feeling so sick, afraid of what I'll look like.  It's making me sick! 

 Help me, please.