Any Other Mom's Out There?

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angsmom
angsmom Member Posts: 22
edited June 2014 in Caring for Someone with Breast cancer

I wanted to see if there are any other mothers going through this with their daughters. My daughter was diagnosed a year ago with HER2+++, she is a stage 3C with 13 of 21 nodes positive.  This has been a shock for the whole family as there is no history of BC.  It's been a really hard year, the diagnosis, surgery, chemo, radiation, and we still have a long way to go.  I would love to talk to other mothers, share experiences and how you cope and stay supportive.

Cathy

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  • pip57
    pip57 Member Posts: 12,401
    edited July 2009

    Cathy,

    Right now I am the one dealing with cancer.  But I have been where you are.  Twelve years ago my 16 year old daughter died after a two year battle with cancer.  I was very aware of what my own mother was going through while I was in tx.  By the way, she too had breast cancer at the same time as my daughter.  

    It is the suckiest, scariest, darkest, and most painful thing to watch your child suffer with a life threatening illness. You can feel so utterly helpless yet you should remember that your daughter will probably rely on you more than ever. When I was finished each chemo, I still wanted my Mommy.  And I know how frightened she is that she will have to bear the same heartache that I have.  

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  • hollyann
    hollyann Member Posts: 2,992
    edited July 2009

    Hugs Cathy......I can only offer gentle hugs and well wishes for your daughter......Cancer sucks no matter what but it really sucks when it is your daughter and not you................i wish you all the best and pray for a cure for this dreaded disease!.......

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  • angsmom
    angsmom Member Posts: 22
    edited July 2009

    Pretty - Thank you so much for sharing this.  I am so sorry to hear what you are having to go through! 

     We have no history of BC so this is all new for us.  As you know, it is very hard when its your child - I would gladly take her place. 

    I will say a prayer for you and your family!

    Cathy

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  • angsmom
    angsmom Member Posts: 22
    edited July 2009

    Hollyann thanks for the hug!  I find that I need them more than ever - I too prayer for a cure for this awful disease.

     Cathy

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  • bren67
    bren67 Member Posts: 18
    edited August 2009

    hello cathy..

    seems we need each other right now..

    my daughter has just been diagnosed with bc, and this friday, they will do a mastecomy,

    and remove the lymphglands too..

    my husband and myself have not been takeing this to good..

    like you, were devastated!

    shes young, 39, with 3 children, a school teacher, and she has a wonderful husband who will stand beside her all the way..

    in that iam thankful!

    i know this will be a hard journey for us all...

    she will start chemo after she heals from the mastecomy, about a month i think?

    what i need to know as a mother in all this,

    what to do to help her!

    i cant make it go away...so i need your help too..

    what do i do next????

    by the way..

    you have my hugs and prayers for your daughter too!!

    bren

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  • angsmom
    angsmom Member Posts: 22
    edited August 2009

    Bren - I am so very sorry to hear about your daughter.  As you will see posted on this board many times this is the club no one wants to join.

    This has been the hardest year of my life.  As a mother you want to protect and comfort your child but with BC I have felt completely helpless.

    My daughter was 33 with an 11 year old daughter and 2 year old son when diagnosed.

    One thing I can tell you is that you are going through the hardest part right now.  The shock of the diagnosis, the surgery, so many doctors and unfortunately there are no guidelines for how to deal with any of this.

    My daughter did very well with the surgery but had a very rough time with chemo. 

    I tried to be there as much as possible, provide meals, take care of the children, anything we could think of to help the family.

    For me the most important thing was to listen to her and be there anytime she needed someone to listen.

    I am thinking of you and praying for you and your family. 

    Please be sure and let me know how your daughter is doing after her surgery.

    Hug! Cathy

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  • bren67
    bren67 Member Posts: 18
    edited August 2009

    thank you so much!

    its been hard for me and her father...

    iam so at loss right now...i just want to make it go away like most moms would want!

    she has a new baby, only 14 months old, one 11 and one 14..

    we will get through this, i know it will be rough..

    but we will..

    thanks!

    ill reply again after friday about her sergery..

    bren

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