Starting chemo January 2009?

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  • YearoftheHat
    YearoftheHat Member Posts: 243
    edited July 2009

    plutz - you'll have to learn to sleep on your back.  In my case it helped to put a pillow on either side of my head, like bookends.  I also needed help sitting up for the first couple of days.  Please don't worry, my doctor's told me my surgery was exceptionally rough, and even so, I got through it fine.

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  • kt57
    kt57 Member Posts: 425
    edited July 2009

    Hi Jewels: Tomorrow we turn the calendar to JULY!!  Another month we can call ourselves survivors! 

    Holtbolt: Add me to the list a teary sisters.   We have shared so much since the first of the year - to share the happiness of a child is pure joy -- thank you for asking for our help.  Max's joy is a gift beyond words.  

    Lisa: Another milestone today!!   I am so happy for youLaughing.  You still have alot ahead of you -- but the toughest part is history!

    Here's another WTF moment:  Family party - we're watching a baseball game..grand slam WOOHOO by a nice looking young player who happens to shave his head.   My SIL goes on and on (and on) about how horrible people look when they shave their heads -----  "why do they do that'  "it looks so bad" "no one looks good like that"....etc. etc.   Everyone else in the room is looking at me -------- I laugh and say, "I don't know, I kinda like it."    Oh, ya just gotta laugh!!!!!  

    Well, don't know if I have chemobrain or estrogen depletion brain - or I simply need time to process the last 8 months......seems to all catch up with me some days.   As much as we want get back to "normal', we have to give ourselves time to heal and recover.  This has been a major assault on our bodies and it will take time, patience and perseverence. 

    Stay strong, Jewels!

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  • lisalisa
    lisalisa Member Posts: 824
    edited July 2009

    Kathy, did SIL even "get" what she said?  omg!

    Curious....does anyone else feel like their DH is "overprotective"?  mine is always saying I shouldn't do this or that if it's "too cold" or "too sunny" or whatever.  Its starting to get annoying!  I want to LIVE not be sheltered!  We need to have a talk real soon......

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  • BerkeleyKim
    BerkeleyKim Member Posts: 390
    edited July 2009

    Holtbolt--I'm so happy for you and Max!!! I could feel his excitement in your words, and I'm glad I could be a tiny part of such huge joy!!!  I'm sure you'll have an amazing time next week. (And Cindy, I like those poofies too for just wearing around. With radiation it's really uncomfortable to wear the heavy one.)

    Lisa-WHOO HOO!!! Done with rads! I'm so glad your skin made it through ok and it sounds like your energy level has been good too. And thanks for the Zometa update. I'm seeing the dentist tomorrow, and hope to get the all-clear. And I hope you have a restful week while the kids are away. The trampoline sounds fun!

    Ddlatt-thanks for the camera link. GAve me an idea for my son's belated grad gift! BEvR-Congrats on your weight loss!! What's your trick. I gained about 10 pounds on the Taxol. LadyJane-Enjoy your trip. Sounds like a beautiful, restful place. And glad your daughter and family made it home safely. Will we ever stop worrying about our "big" kids!?? I think I've begun to worry a bit less since my diagnosis. Not that I don't care as much but I really realize that so much is not in my control, and I just have to hope for the best and expect the best.

    Plutz-I just had a single mast., but it was pretty pain-free. I spent one night in the hospital (no recon). I healed really quickly from the initial surgery. I think I may have overdone exercising my arm, and it is still after all this time sore and my shoulder is stiff, although my range of motion is good. I'm having PT for strengthening it. Good luck with your surgery! Do you know if you need to have any lymph nodes removed?

    YearoftheHat-Hope you can work out some kind of accommodation. And Renrel--Glad your returning to work is working out for you. I'm really nervous about starting my new job, and the expectations of people who don't know what I've been through. My last school was so supportive and I felt so embraced. But now that safety net isn't there. Yikes.

    Jess--I need to take that step of contacting my social worker to talk about my fears. I'm looking at scary statistics, and I'm really having a hard time with that. Keep us posted if you feel comfortable with that on how it goes.

    Like Catherine and KT (and you put so many of my thoughts into better words than I can!), I feel so lucky to have had the jewels with me through these months. Not lucky that any of us got this terrible disease, but for the support and companionship. I'm glad that we got through the chemo together, and that those of you who are done are still here for us who are still doing rads, looking at more surgeries, and taking hormone blockers (I'm starting week 3 of Arimidex and so far so good--I agree kmmd that sometimes we hear mostly from those with bothersome SEs on the Hormone thread, and I wish that no one has to have any SEs from drugs that can help us). . I'm hoping we'll be here for each other through disease-free years to come..

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  • ktym
    ktym Member Posts: 2,637
    edited July 2009

    Fatigue and chemo brain, yep, I'm sitting here needing to get up and ready for work and just said to DH "I grabbed the pill bottle, but now I'm looking at it and can't remember if I actually opened it up and took the meds."  Mornings are really not my best time right now.  Obviously I need one of those pill cases like the oldsters use. 

    I like the thought of July coming in and its another month we're survivors.  The transition is hard.  Luckily my Onc spends some time talking about it and validating that it is difficult dealing with SE's and learning to live with the fear.   

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  • jrgolomb
    jrgolomb Member Posts: 1,236
    edited July 2009

    KMMD-  I know exactly what you mean about the forgetting the pill situation, but I did that BEFORE dx!!!  LOL

    KT---Yup, ya gotta laugh!!!!

    Berkeley Kim-I always appreciate how you touch base with each one of us.  Thank you so much.

    pLutz---I fared okay with the mast.  I had the drains in for a bit.  That was probably the most difficult part for me, but I had/have a very good bs and that helps.  

    Year of the hat is right about sleeping on your back, Phyllis.

    Have a great day JJS. I plan on checking in with this post for  a looooooong time.

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  • shockedat39
    shockedat39 Member Posts: 252
    edited July 2009

    Hi Jewels!

    I hope everyone is doing well today! 

    I had to post this.  I was just outside bringing in the recycle bin and I GOT STUNG BY A BEE RIGHT IN MY BOOB!!!  Radiation side, of course!  Little SOB couldn't have aimed better if he tried.  So random I had to laugh!!

    Everyone take care and have a great day.

    Diane 

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  • PLUTZ
    PLUTZ Member Posts: 133
    edited July 2009

    ddlatt- I do plan on reconstruction but was told I would have to wait  at least 6 months. I did ask my breast surgeon about my healthy breast and told me the chances of getting cancer is very low, so I plan on having breast reduction when I have reconstruction.

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  • ktym
    ktym Member Posts: 2,637
    edited July 2009

    Diane, OMG, hope you're ok.  That sounds painful!! Hope the SOB is now toxic or burned the you know what out of his stinger

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  • Renrel
    Renrel Member Posts: 497
    edited July 2009

    Just a quick post. I was skimming an old yoga magazine that I had picked up for a song at a resale place and they had an article on the best yoga poses for different points in a woman's life. I was looking over the peri and menapause poses and found mention of an artical in a menapuase journal that talked about a simple breathing exercise that decreased hot flashes by 40% in some study.  Just breathing in for a count of 5 and out for a count of 5 for, I think 5 minutes.  I did the breathing for a while last night ( I didn't time myself) and I slept through from maybe 11:30 to 6ish. Now I also did some exercise last night and pulled out my guided imagery script on my IPOD for the first time in ages, but still, I will be trying this some more.  It would be nice to control them without putting anything new into my body. Not that I have done any research or asked for anything for them so far.  But they are interferring too much with my sleep for me to just deal with them and get foward to a normal life.  It is not so bad if I can just sleep late each morning but I am trying to get into a normal work schedule and can't be starting at 10am or later forever.  

    The last few days I have had a saddness in me.  I noticed it after art therapy, so maybe it brought up something real in me but I am not sure what it is.  An old pain? Saddness about all the losses of the last half year that I have not perhaps allowed myself to feel?  Fear of the future?  Saddness at transitioning out of a period of time when I could focus on me and so did everyone else?  Has helping a newbie and her husband through the pre-surgury scared phase of the journey bring up some of my own latent feelings of fear?  Or just a Taxmosaphin side effect?  I am trying to let myself feel it when it comes upon me and to observe it and sit with it.  

    Today I am giving the above mentioned newbie a ride into the hospital for the yoga class we are both taking. That class is the only thing on the agenda today, so maybe I will get somethings done in the house this afternoon.  I will try for shout outs later but I wanted to share the breathing thing with you all in case anyone wanted to give it a try. 

    See ya,

    Renrel

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  • Renrel
    Renrel Member Posts: 497
    edited July 2009

    Plutz- I had bi lat with immediate reconstruction and it went great.  I weaned of of the pain meds very quickly and they wanted to release me from the hospital after just one night. I said no, I like the nice up and down bed and my mom told me to enjoy the food while I could because she was not cooking me a half dozen things each meal like I was getting (LOL).  I too had trouble sleeping.  I had to foam wedges that someone lent me that supported my head and under my  knees that help keep me on my back, but I would wake up wanting to reposition and when I couldn't I could not fall back asleep. My PS gave me a muscle relaxant to both prevent spasms that might of been waking me and too help me sleep and they did the job. I could not lift my arms over my head so I got alot of zip and button up tops and camis I could step into.  I put all the clothes I was wearing in my lower drawers.  My bedside table is actual behind my bed so we put a wheeled cart, like for a microwave, in the room so I could reach things when in bed and wheel it out of the way when it was not needed.  We also found a neat gadget at staples that allows you to put one  on/off electonic on a portable light switch.  I put my  lamp on it so I could turn it on and off easily when in bed.  I had my parents stay with us for 4 weeks and then my ILs for 2 weeks and then my husband was home for a week on a forced shut down. So I had other people around to reach things on shelves and stuff. It was annoying having to ask someone for help when ever I wanted a glass to drink milk but I got through it.  I was instructed not to lift anything heavier than a quart of milk for about 4-6 weeks.  I got scolded when the bag I carried to my PS appointment appeared heavier than that.  The worst part for me was that I had a skin reaction to the tape they used to hold the drains in place.  I was all red and ichy.  But that did get me my drains removed at my first PS visit because if a fear of infection.  By the way emptying the drains sounds much worse than it is.  The annoying part is finding someplace to store the drain bulbs while up and about.  There are velcro pockets you can get to attatch to the inside of some clothing to help with that.  

    kt57 - Sometimes we all speak without engaging brain. I am glad you handled the situation with such grace.

    Diane - How is the bee sting today?   

     Kmmd - I have the same pill problem and have concidered one of those daily box things too.  I am becoming my mother.

     Bev- great news about the weight loss. I finally saw a small drop, one or two pounds last week. I think it is water that is finally leaving my system since I seem to be peeing more.  

    --

    I was so looking forward to my first day without work in awhile.  I miss time to get things done at my own very slow pace.  But after yoga class today I threw up on the way home (I had been feeling funky before class) so I just spent the rest of the day in bed.  I am feeling better but not quite right yet.

    I decided to listen to saved messages on my phone today and delete some.  The several messages were from doctors, including one from my PS trying to locate my DH after I got out of surgury.  Very strange.  I deleted most but still not all of them.  Not sure why I am saving them.

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  • lisalisa
    lisalisa Member Posts: 824
    edited July 2009

    Hi all,

    today was my DEXA bone density test.  It was the easiest test so far!  It was kind of like an xray and no need for any contrast drink or IV (thank god!)

    Anyway, great news!  My bone densisty is perfectly normal!  No issues at all after chemo or due to my chemopause!  So, prior to hysto/tamox/zometa, I'm in GOOD shape!  yeah!

    anyone else do this test?   if so, my T score was 92% and my Z score was 98%.  woohoo!

    HAPPY 4th to all of you!
    Lisa

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  • kt57
    kt57 Member Posts: 425
    edited July 2009

    HI Jewels:   Am a little anxious today.  Genetic testing showed a BRCA 2 mutation.   I went the lumpectomy followed by radiation route.  See both med and rad oncs next Thursday to see what they recommend. Have good reason to ask for MRI follow-up, not just mammograms.  Have to think about getting the ovaries out.  And they recommend my brothers and son get tested. 

    The genetic counselor left a message on my home phone... had specificcaly asked that she call my work number -- and my DH got the message first.  Hadn't even told him I was getting the test -- when he heard the message, he thought it meant I needed more chemo and he was a wreck when I got home.    And to round off the day, we had a theft -- all my DH power tools stolen out of our garage.  

    Think I'm gonna dig out that ativan bottle...haven't needed that for months.  

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  • BerkeleyKim
    BerkeleyKim Member Posts: 390
    edited July 2009

    Lisa-I did have a bone density test but never got the numbers, just was told I was a bit below normal. 

    Finally told my doctor that I wanted to go on Zometa and not do the bisphosphonates trial. Also told the trial director, and I sorta flippantly said Hope my insurance covers the Zometa. She said she'd look into it for me, and lo and behold apparently the med group I'm part of and HealthNet won't cover it unless I have bone mets. But I hope my onc can get me Zometa since my bone density test was slightly below normal  mid-chemo and with the Arimidex will probably just get worse. I'm kinda hoping for that in an almost perverse way.

    I'll find out Monday. I need to sign up for the trial by Weds.

    Renrel--thanks for the breathing idea. I'm able to fall back asleep after my early am hot flashes, but I know once school starts again I'll have trouble due to my anxiety about making sure I wake up at 6:30!

    Went to my support group last night (of woman with different types of cancer). The running theme was "hyper-vigilance" of our bodies and how that sucks the joy out of so much. The woman who brought up the theme had Hodgkins Lymphoma in her early 20s, with chest radiation that led to breast cancer. She had a very early cancer over 2 years ago but still feels anxiety & fear. It really helped to talk about it, and hear the other woman's stories, and the common thread of "waiting for the other shoe to drop."

    I'm trying hard to have faith that I'll survive this and continue to make plans for the long term, including finishing my master's coursework and teaching. I do find joy in that, but there's a lot of traveling I'd like to do and other stuff. I look at my tumor path report and freak out. How long do I have? How do I fit it all in? How do I lead what Oprah calls my best life? I forgot to call my social worker today to make an appt about my anxiety. Wow this is long--thanks for listening! I just can't unload this stuff on my dh or kids (of course!),

    KT--Wow, just saw your post as I was going to submit mine--Lots to process. I've been eyeing my Ativan bottle too! My onc was referring me for genetic counseling. Forgot to ask today what's happening with that. My dad died of prostate cancer was the main reason he recommended testing. (even though his mom died of bc). Your poor husband. Mine has shared finally that he is really worried for me. I'm sorry about the theft. That sucks.

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  • lisalisa
    lisalisa Member Posts: 824
    edited July 2009

    Kathy - I'm sorry that you got that news.  I don't get why they didn't have you do the BRCA test BEFORE surgery?!?!  then, you could have made a decision guided by information.  I did the BRCA test, it was negative but I still opted for a mastectomy. 

    I'm sorry that you may have to have surgery again.  See what your doctors recommend.  The ovary thing is another decision.  I'm being super aggressive and going for a hysterectomy in early August.   I want to get this over with and hopefully not deal with it again!

    We're here for you as you sort this all out.  Hugs!

    Lisa

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  • lisalisa
    lisalisa Member Posts: 824
    edited July 2009

    Berkeley Kim - hmmmm.....never thought about insurance NOT covering zometa!  I'm going to ask my oncologist about that asap!  yikes!  i've heard that it's expensive!

    I'm so relieved about my bone density.  I'm starting my 5 mile daily walks again tomorrow.  I've been avoiding the sun during rads but I'm just going to get my butt out of bed tomorrow and walk while the june gloom covers the sun!  I need to get started on dropping weight and keep my bone mass!

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  • Alo123
    Alo123 Member Posts: 308
    edited July 2009

    Kathy....I'm sorry about your BRCA status.  I am BRCA1.  My stupid luck...I found out a year prior to my cancer....I was monitoring with MRI,mammo,CA125 and sonograms for the Ovarian cancer.  Exactly a year to the date of my BRCA1...I found BC via mammo.  Of course I did the Bilat and oopherectomy at the same time.  Have you been to the FORCE.org website?  It is a great place for BRCA gals.  PM me if yo uneed and other BRCA support...I have a few friend in the same boat...

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  • Renrel
    Renrel Member Posts: 497
    edited July 2009

    kt57 - Sorry about the Braca news and the theft.  What a truely lousy day! 

    lisalisa - I had the bone density test just before meeting with my Onc after chemo was done.  Also all normal, though for one part, I think the hips?  in the low normal.  Suprising given that I hated milk as a kid and have not done much exercising.  I need to work on getting more stenthening and weight baring exercises into my life style.  Anyway, I am not doing any extra drugs with the taxotere, at least for the moment.  Just an aside on the remove everything decision.  It may very well be the best decision for you, but my mom had her ovaries removed when she needed to have her uterius out, due to cysts I think, and has some regrets. She hadn't really thought it through completely and did not realize how many things estrogen did in her body that it not does not do.  You are the queen of research so you probably have weighted all this and made an informed decision but just in case I thought I would put that out there.  

    --

    I am feeling better today, so far anyway.  And I ate junk after dinner last night without gettng sick, so it was probably just a short lived bug I had or something I ate, though I can't think what that could have been.  Today we are going to RI to visit with family coming up from NY for the holiday weekend.  Tomorrow we are invited to a pool party next door and a watch the fireworks party on a balcony in the evening.  Sunday DS has a playdate at our home (which will not be ready for company but if I wait for that to happen we will never have anyone over).  A friend just called DH while I was on the phone offering up extra plants that have multiplied in his garden so we will need to work in picking those up and planting them this weekend.  And mircle of mircles!   The sun is out for the first time all week and may be around all weekend (on and off anyway) so we can finally plant or vegi garden!  

    It is 11:30 and I am still in my jammies, so I am going to sign off now. Enjoy the holiday everyone! 

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  • kt57
    kt57 Member Posts: 425
    edited July 2009

    Lisa: My family history of bc and cancer in general is not high.  Because of my age --- which at 51 and being postmeopausal, I did not consider "young" for bc, so I didn't do testing initially. My med onc concurred.. or at least said there was no rush. Then I decided to test after watching the video that ddlatt posted and doing more reading --- and then only so my son would know for his future....  which I figured would be different than it is......now he has 50% chance of carrying the mutation. 

    I called the Genetic counselor and got as much info as I could absorb.   Silly me, I figured my left boob has some added insurance with the rads --- am thinking now the rads exponentially increased my risk to a new bc in that breast.   Read that if you test positive at an early age (20s)-- they don't even recommend annual mammograms right away because of the increased risk that exposure to radiation carries -- that little bit from mammography!!!  

    Thursday I see my doctors --- wondering how soon after rads I can have mastectomies.... 

    The euphoria over "being done" is gone --- now just have to manage the slide into despair.  Am usually pretty good at it.. this will be a test!   

    Thanks renrel for the breathing advice -- used that instead of ativan,  Worked pretty well.

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  • eadsla
    eadsla Member Posts: 217
    edited July 2009

    Kathy--I am so sorry to hear about you're having to go through.  I wish I had some words of wsidom or experience to offer.  Any questions I could think of I'm sure have already crossed your mind.  I'm sending out positive thoughts for you and hope you will let us all know how it all goes.

    Catherine

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  • holtbolt
    holtbolt Member Posts: 625
    edited July 2009

    First off and most importantly, Kathy, I am really so sorry to hear about your BRCA results... I'm one of unfortunate ones who had a lumpectomy, rads, then ended up having a bilat 15 months later... so yeah.. the devastation of thinking it's over and then thinking there's more to come is very tough.. I'm sorry... but you are tough... you can get through whatever you need to...are you saying you may have a mast now or bilat?   I too am looking at ovarian removal here shortly.. so there are a lot of us who still have more on the menu.... we will be here for you...

    Plutz... when is your surgery?  (My experience with a bilat.).. .. I made myself sick overmedicating out of pain paranoia ... I mean literally sick... vomiting, etc.. I didn't need pain meds every 4 hours ...but I took them anyway and it was actually too much... take it as you need it but don't go in thinking you're going to need all that much... it really wasn't as painful as I had it in my head it was going to be I guess...according to my surgeon.. many people make the mistake I did... if I had to do it over.. I would try to get by on less meds...

    Lisa - woohoo on the stellar bone density!!! 

    Diane.. that little bee bastard! OMG!  As if your boob hasn't been through enough!!! 

    Everybody else... I hope you're doing well... I can't keep everyone straight.. Berk-Kim has a gift for that doesn't she?  Wow...

    So.. listen to this...

    The Aerosmith concert was cancelled on Wednesday and did not happen... just when we were pulling out of the driveway.. ugh!!.  All we know at this point is what has been posted on the venue website and fan website.. postponed due to "artist injury" ... they say a reschedule date will be announced.  We all hope that no one is seriously injured but they also postponed their concert in Hershey PA tonight.. (?)

    As you can imagine, it was a huge disappointment...... (we sat there stunned and teary eyed)... but instead of moping, the three of us got in the car and went to an amusement park (Kings Island) ..because when life gives you lemons... I guess you go eat funnel cakes! lol.  It turned out to be an excellent idea because we had fun and laughed alot....Anyway,  we all have our fingers crossed that they can reschedule and Max will still get to meet them and see them play.....

    Have a great 4th of July Jewels.. muah! 

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  • PLUTZ
    PLUTZ Member Posts: 133
    edited July 2009

    HAPPY 4th of JULY everyone!

    Holtbolt-

    I 'm sorry to hear about the concert getting postponed. Hopefully there will be a rescheduled date. I'm glad you had a good time at Kings Island. Never been there and I live in Ohio. Plan on going to Cedar Point next week but my legs have been so sore. I want to do something with my family before my surgery, by the way its Fri. July 17th.

    I hope everyone else is doing well. The weekend is supposed to be really nice. We're having our cookout tomorrow. Have a great weekend.

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  • ddlatt
    ddlatt Member Posts: 448
    edited July 2009

    happy fourth!

    we've been through so much together!  monday is my very last radiation treatment, and to celebrate, i did something today that i've been procrastinating about since 2003. i bought a ticket to return to paris (where i went to college and then was back in 2003 with my oldest son) and booked a hotel room in my favorite part of the city. two weeks in october!!

    i never dreamed last september, when i heard "you have a small cancer" that the following july i'd be happy, energetic, healthy, and planning my trip to paris.

    la vie est belle!

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  • BevR
    BevR Member Posts: 101
    edited July 2009

    ddlatt......so happy for this opportunity! You need and deserve it......

    Holtbolt, sorry about the concert, with all you've been through you do know how to make lemonaide out of lemons!

    Happy 4th everyone!

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  • lisalisa
    lisalisa Member Posts: 824
    edited July 2009

    ddlatt - VERY exciting!   good for you!

    holtbolt - so sorry for the delay!  hope max' dream comes true soon!

    the kids (10 and 6) got back from Camp Kesem last night (a camp for kids who have a parent with cancer).  they had a blast!  they are beyond exhausted so we've cancelled our annual trip to corondado.  instead, we are going to an Angel's baseball game tonight and staying for the fireworks.  should be fun!

    meanwhile, my daughter and I are working ever so slowly on one of those "no sew" blankets....tying pieces of fleece together. what was i thinking LOL!?!?!?  she can barely tie her shoelaces!

    HAPPY 4TH everyone!  I'm SO PROUD to be an AMERICAN!!!!! Cool

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  • ktym
    ktym Member Posts: 2,637
    edited July 2009

    ddlatt: congratulations

    hotbolt: so disappointing, so sorry to hear that, hope you have a good weekend anyway

    lisalisa: Happy 4th of July, hope your troops are getting some rest and support (I have one of those blankets and love it, cuddled it a lot during chemo)

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  • jrgolomb
    jrgolomb Member Posts: 1,236
    edited July 2009

    Kmmd--hi there friend.  I hope you had a great weekend as well.

    Holtbolt--I got your pm and I hope the info I relayed to you helps.

    LIsalisa- Happy 4th to you and yours!!!!!!!

    Hey BEV--same to you.

    PLutz--I bet you are glad your surgery is set. 

    I get my port out tomorrow.  Of course I forgot to call them until about an hour ago and the dept is closed.  Oh well, I am showing up there tomorrow anyway!!!  Pre reg or no pre reg! I will have my rad tx anyway.  Gosh, I wonder how loopy I'll be for rad tx.....When I had the port put in, I was pretty shall we say "outgoing" with the nurses and surgeon. 

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  • ktym
    ktym Member Posts: 2,637
    edited July 2009

    Jess, good to hear from you too.  Caught up on some needed sleep (I am wiped by the end of the work week) and this AM got a lot of laundry done, some green tea bags steeping for some sun tea, and stir fryed up some asparagus that is so good. Plus, put together salads for lunches for the week.  So, sitting back now with a good book.

    It must feel so good to have that port coming out.  When is rads finished for you? 6 months then before you can do the reconstruction?   

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  • Renrel
    Renrel Member Posts: 497
    edited July 2009

    Hotbolt - Sorry about the delay.  It will happen though.  It has to.

    Plutz- I hope your cook out went well. 

    ddlat- Your trip sounds wonderful!  So great to have something real to look forward to rather then just being done with something, you know what I mean?  DH and I are going to take a few days for some sort of alone together time.  Small chance it will be Aruba since he got some e-mail for a deal; that would give us 5 days for 2 for around $1000.  If not that a b&b somewhere in New England.  But I have decided that we are taking some reasonably big trip in 2 yrs.  It will be our 10th aniversary and 2 yrs is, I believe, the first yeah you are doing good! milestone.  I am thinking positive that we will be celebrating no resucurances at that point. 

    lisa,lisa - Glad the kids had a good time.  I bet it was nice being "childless" for a short while. I know I have a great time when my parents take DS for a week now and then. 

    Jrgolomb - Good luck with the port tomorrow.

    --

    We have been busy and I am feeling way too tired and grumpy at the end of the day, but trying to to show it.  Friday we drove to RI and visiting at the ILs with family up from NY.  It was fun but we stayed till around 11pm and then still had a drive home.  Saturday we tried to buy tomatoes plants but the two places we tried were sold out.  We had breakfast out and did food shopping for the potlucks we were attending during the week. On the way home we swung by a garage sale around the block from our home. I ended up with a sewing machine, 4 disney videos, 1 jump start computer game, a soccer ball, a frizee and a basketball for $30.  It helped that I was wearing a turban and the seller assumed chemo.  Turns out she had bc about 4 yrs ago and her husband died of rectal cancer.  Seems once you are diagnosised you suddenly realize how many lives Cancer touches.

    Then I spent over an hour making a huge fruit salad and DH made a pasta salad.  Then we went to a cousin's home for grilling and fireworks watching.  Another late night.  We all got to bed around midnight.  Today DS is having a playdate and we are still at the parents stay over stage, so we have been cleaning the house all morning and DH was mowing the lawn.  My men are on their way out the door to get bagels ect and I am about to shower and do more straightening. It will not look like we actually cleaned for company but it may not look like we were raised in a barn.I also want to whip some crream to go with the fruit that did not make it into the salad yesterday.   We were also invited to a pool party at our next door neighbors home yesterday which was moved to today because the weather report seemed better. So when the friends leave, we will head next door if the parth is still going, taking the remaing halves of the two salads we made yesterday.  I can not tell you how happy I am that I did not schedule myself to work on Monday, and that there are no support opportunities to take advantage of. I can rest, and do some paperwork, food shop, ect.  It will be like being a SAHM for a day, except that I plan to spend more time resting than any SAHM would ever find the time for. 

     This week I am trying longer days at work.  Two 6 hours days, Tuesday and Friday.  Wensday I have Gi Gong, meditation and a massage.  It should be a nice relaxing day. Thursday I have Yoga and a Dentist appointment.  

    I am wondering if the taxoter may have caused my stomach stuff the other day.  I am finding I m getting an off feeling every now and then but it is not enough to throw up and it goes away.  I have also being waves of saddness and I don't know whether it is the post chemo breakdown we were warned of, or the Taxotere, or lack of sleep, or something all this art and writing therapy and meditation, ect is bring up from deep inside.  

    People keep telling me I should write a book because they seem to find my "take" on canser to be different or inspirational, or something. I don't really believe I have a books worth of incite but I thought a collect of essays by diffenent canser suerviors might be interesting.  The title would be "How to Do Cancer."  Just playing with the idea. I have no idea where I would begin.

    OK, as I said, we are expecting company and I am not dressed yet.  Chat later...

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  • jrgolomb
    jrgolomb Member Posts: 1,236
    edited July 2009

    I absolutely agree with your friends Renrel, write a book.  I like the idea of the essays.  Good idea!

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