the funny things kids say....

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AlaskaDeb
AlaskaDeb Member Posts: 2,601
edited June 2014 in Humor and Games
the funny things kids say....
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  • AlaskaDeb
    AlaskaDeb Member Posts: 2,601
    edited April 2008

    A 1st grade school teacher had twenty-six students in her class.  She presented each child in her classroom the 1st half of a well-known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb.  It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders.  Their insight may surprise you.  While reading, keep in mind that these are first-graders, 6-year-olds, because the last one is a classic!

    1.  Don't change horses              until they stop running. 

    2.  Strike while the                      bug is close. 

    3.  It's always darkest before     Daylight Saving Time. 

    4.  Never underestimate the power of         termites. 

    5.  You can lead a horse to water but           How? 

    6.  Don't bite the hand that          looks dirty. 

    7.  No news is                impossible 

    8  A miss is as good as a             Mr. 

    9.  You can't teach an old dog new           Math 

    10.  If you lie down with dogs,         you'll  stink in the morning. 

    11.  Love all, trust                     Me. 

    12.  The pen is mightier than the                pigs. 

    13.  An idle mind is                    the best way to relax. 

    14.  Where there's smoke there's               pollution. 

    15.  Happy the bride who                gets all the presents. 

    16.  A penny saved is                  not much. 

    17.  Two's company, three's          the Musketeers. 

    18.  Don't put off till tomorrow what       you put on to go to bed. 

    19.  Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and                                                   You have to blow your nose. 

    20.  There are none so blind as     Stevie Wonder. 

    21.  Children should be seen and not      spanked or grounded. 

    22.  If at first you don't succeed    get new batteries. 

    23.  You get out of something only what you 

    See in the picture on the box 

    24.  When the blind lead the blind      get out of the way. 

    25.  A bird in the hand            is going to poop on you. 

    26.  Better late than                       Pregnant 

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  • newter
    newter Member Posts: 4,330
    edited April 2008

    Thanks, I have a 6 year old first grader so I really enjoyed this.

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  • takingcare
    takingcare Member Posts: 1,941
    edited April 2008

    If ever you need to lift your spirits, spend time with a child.  They are God's great wonders and such blessings!

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  • footprintsangel
    footprintsangel Member Posts: 43,890
    edited February 2009

    This is a Good way to remember our friend

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  • toyful
    toyful Member Posts: 1,461
    edited February 2009

    Here is a true story about my 6 year old daughter.

    My grandma had died and she had an open casket for family viewing only. I was really concerned about what my daughter would say when she saw Great Grandma in the casket. She came in the room, glanced at the casket and announced quite jollily, "I know where GG is," while we kind of held our breath for the rest of the sentence. She finished her statement saying, "She is up in heaven." We thought it was pretty smart that she figured out that GG was not in her body but had passed on to a better place.

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  • footprintsangel
    footprintsangel Member Posts: 43,890
    edited February 2009

    I think kids are a very special part of our healing

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  • Marple
    Marple Member Posts: 19,143
    edited February 2009

    Thanks Foot!!!

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  • bkc
    bkc Member Posts: 320
    edited February 2009

    That is so funny. I've read it twice and it still makes me laugh.

    My 4 year old pronounces YELLOW as Wellow. I have been correcting her for weeks. Today she said with a roll of the eyes and a huge sigh "Mommy, if I say YELLOW would you PLEASE let me wear my WELLOW  jacket!

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  • lvtwoqlt
    lvtwoqlt Member Posts: 6,162
    edited February 2009

    My mom tells the story of my siblings and I spent the weekend at my grandmother's house when my mom was in the hospital having the youngest brother (I think we were about 6,4,and 3) and when she was fixing breakfast she burnt the toast and my older sister (the 4 yr old) told grandma she didn't like chocolate toast.

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  • bkc
    bkc Member Posts: 320
    edited February 2009

    Funny Funny

     Every morning my husband brings me coffee in bed. It is well known and a standing joke that I must have my coffee or I can't function.

    Last fall he took an overnight trip out of town.

    At 5am my then 3 and 4 year old daughters woke me up with Coffee Cake. Their recipe

    Bag of sugar

    Bag of flour

    Half can of coffee

    Water

    Mix all ingredients together on kitchen floor. Place on paper plate and deliver to mom in bed.

    No need to bake.

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  • footprintsangel
    footprintsangel Member Posts: 43,890
    edited February 2009

    I bet that tasted good, Did you have any?

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  • bkc
    bkc Member Posts: 320
    edited February 2009

    Actually after I sat down on the floor and cried and my 4 year old asked if they were happy tears (I think I was laughing and crying at the same time)  I did take a taste.Very Bad!  We spent the entire day cleaning up  (HUGE MESS)  and then made cup cakes.

     Even after steam cleaning the carpet I still have little girl foot prints that lead from the kitchen to my bedroom. Stain just will not come out. Carpet guy said  the only thing we can do is change the carpet.

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  • footprintsangel
    footprintsangel Member Posts: 43,890
    edited February 2009

    Kids are one of the greatest ways to help us remember all the good times

    A childs, " I love you."  

    A Kids hug

    To a ouch that is made better by a kiss.

     My nephew told me on time that he knew everything, I ask him what is everything?

    I dont know he said, But I know! He was making sand cookies at that time and they do taste better bkc.

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  • footprintsangel
    footprintsangel Member Posts: 43,890
    edited February 2009

    When I was a kid ask my mom where he came from, I was told a stork brought me

    and left me at the door.  And I told all my friend that storks bring kids.

    What did your mom tell you?

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  • bkc
    bkc Member Posts: 320
    edited February 2009

    Don't remember ever asking my mom but remember her saying every time Daddy hung his pants on the bed post another baby showed up. They had 8 kids. Took me along time to figure that one out!!!!!

    I told my 5 year old that Jesus brought her to me and one day when she was mad at me she said "Well I think Jesus dropped me off at the wrong place!

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  • pip57
    pip57 Member Posts: 12,401
    edited February 2009

    When I told my daughter where babies come from, she scrunched up her nose and was clearly thinking very hard.  Then she says, "I don't ever remember seeing you and Dad do that!"

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  • bkc
    bkc Member Posts: 320
    edited February 2009

    On the way to school this morning my 5 year old daughter asked "Mama how old will I be when I fall in love?" "Oh hopefully sometime around when you're 20 or 25 when you're all grown up." I said.

    "Well when I grow up I sure hope I grow up and fall in love with my friend Dally. (This is a little boy in her class)

    I just smiled and said "Maybe so".

    After she went inside I sat in the car with tears in my eyes. My baby has her first crush!

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  • footprintsangel
    footprintsangel Member Posts: 43,890
    edited February 2009

    25 is pretty old to fall in love mom

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  • bkc
    bkc Member Posts: 320
    edited February 2009

    I know I know. Just trying to convince myself she's still my baby at least for a little while longer. Is 20 more years to much to ask? lol

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  • kim40
    kim40 Member Posts: 904
    edited February 2009

    My son was in Grade 5 when they started to have "the talk" at school.  I told him that once he seen the film, I am open to any questions that he may have.  So, when he came home, I ask him how it went.  He expressed his concerns over me having eggs and thought that if I don't conceive, do I go into the bathroom and lay them like a chicken!!!

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  • footprintsangel
    footprintsangel Member Posts: 43,890
    edited February 2009

    When I was young I was told about the tooth fairy. I always wonder where the tooth fairy

    lived and how she knew when someone lost a tooth. She just knew. I ask what she did

    with the rotten ones, She told me they were remodeled. I believed her

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  • footprintsangel
    footprintsangel Member Posts: 43,890
    edited March 2009

    There was a child in the store today, He ask his mom if he would grow up to be like other guys

    She ask him why? Cause some guys are like Santa claus, Can I be too and give gifts?

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  • newter
    newter Member Posts: 4,330
    edited March 2009

    Last week we had friends visit.  When they are mad at their 4 year old they call him by his first and middle name (Thomas).   One day the little boy was mad at his mom and called her Mommy Thomas.

    So funny.

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  • footprintsangel
    footprintsangel Member Posts: 43,890
    edited March 2009

    There was a little boy in church thats mom told the 3 kids to be quiet. He looked at his two sisters and loudy told the that they where in church to be quiet. Mom turned red.

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  • footprintsangel
    footprintsangel Member Posts: 43,890
    edited April 2009

     Some little kid ask his mom what she would be when she grows up?

    She told her she would be just like her, cause she was so nice.

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  • footprintsangel
    footprintsangel Member Posts: 43,890
    edited April 2009

    When I think  of all the ways Alaska Deb made us smile, I think we should keep the smile going for her.

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  • footprintsangel
    footprintsangel Member Posts: 43,890
    edited April 2009

    A kid ask me how many years til I can have kids. Im in my fifties

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  • bkc
    bkc Member Posts: 320
    edited April 2009

    My 4 year old came home from daycare today and told me her friends mom had a baby in her tummy. Later on she was walking around with her baby doll under her shirt. I asked her what she was doing and she said she had a baby in her tummy. I asked what she was gonna do when it was born and she said send it to grandmas!

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  • footprintsangel
    footprintsangel Member Posts: 43,890
    edited June 2009

    When I was young my Aunt told my a stork dropped my brother down the chimney.

    I ask why he wasnt a ash color then.

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  • kbugmom
    kbugmom Member Posts: 15,189
    edited June 2009

    My grands hamster when they first got it liked to bite. Thankfully has stopped biting . A few days ago I asked Jordan was Peanut still being good not biting. She said he is being good. She was real quiet on the phone not listening to what I asked next so I said Jordan you arent biting Peanut are you. She says Grandma and starts yelling to her siblings and parents Grandma wanted to know was I biting Peanut. Well I got her attention.

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