Embracing the Bald
Comments
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bump
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Not sure why I feel the need to share the before and after. The fact that I look just like my brother, now that my hair's growing back, has nothing to do with it. I'm almost missing my bald head.
Anyway... this is my hair saving party. This is our bald friend.
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This is three months post chemo. T/C X 6
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Renee: Your hair length and pattern of growing back is just like mine. Also about the same length at 3 months out. Agree with you, in some ways bald was easier. Plus, at least it was low maintennance. I loved how short showers and getting ready in the morning were with no hair and no shaving. Do you still have the face fuzz thing going on? I do
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HI Renee, Were not to far from one another. I also have two very Dear friends that live in that area.
I just recently went bald. I have been having alot a fun with it. Like the ole saying "Bald is beautiful". I find it very freeing. I also like that we do have a choice of what we can do with our bald heads. Many characters can be played. I work at Safeway, we were joking around, One of my fellow employees said I should get a long blond wig and would call me "LOLA". In return I said I would do a pole dance for them. It was quite hilarious, only because I have contractures and would probably fall on my A$$.
It just nice that we can have the confidence to do and say what we want. Renee I'm with you. GO FOR IT. Have fun. Heather
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Kmmd....I do have the fuzz but I've been keeping it short. I understand that it goes away in time. I miss my bald head.
Heather....Go LOLA.....Go LOLA. I wonder if I've crossed paths with your friends. What do they do? DH and I have a very public occupation so we know allot of people.
Walk proud ladies.
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Heather...I read through a few of your old posts. Are you really a Duck fan or just have the hat. I'm also curious to know a few things about your past treatment before your recurrence. Do you mind if I ask?
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Well Truth be known it is my husbands hat. I do like the ducks. It's just really hard for me to sit and watch sports. I want to be in there playing too. So I keep busy doing other things. My friends are Vern and Cherry Hoffman. Lonnie and Anne This is terrible i am having a major brain fart. I can't remember Lonnie and Annes last name. I think this chemo has fried my brain!!!!!!!! OH how embarrassing I had to call and ask her. Thank god she totally understood, She just went through chemo. The bad thing I didn't think to look in my cell phone where it was programmed. Her last name Cokely.
Renee, you may ask me any questions you want. That is one thing I wish I would have done in 2002 when I had my first DX. I would have come here and ask everyone for advice. especially stage 4 gals. I would have been more of advocate in my test. TM'S, SCANS ETC.
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I've been on chemo since April of 08. So I've been bald for most of that time. I had a couple of wigs from my first treatments 11 years ago. Bought a couple of really fun, sexy wigs that I tried on in Florida when I visited my brothers early last fall. I LOVE being bald. I never have looked good in a baseball cap. And wigs can get pretty uncomfortable, especially during hotflashes. So I mostly go bald, sometimes with body glitter on my head. When I have the urge for hair, I pick the one that fits the mood and the outfit. And when I need to keep warm, a wig helps. Love having the freedom to choose what I want to look like. I, too, have had so many positive experiences with the bald head. Smiles and kindness abound. Compliments, too. I think many people count their blessings after they see me. They don't know that I count my blessings, too!!
Bald IS beautiful! And so are we!! Apple, I LOVE the scarf look. I may try that this summer!
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Heather.....Your friends don't sound familiar....darn, I thought we might have one of those six degrees of separation things going on. I bet they know someone, that knows someone, that I know, that knows you.
My question to you is.....did you take Tamoxifen and if you did, were you tested to see if you metabolize it? What stage were you?
I ask about the Ducks because my youngest daughter dates one of the players.
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Yes I took tamoxifen for five years. I will have to ask my ONC about the metabolizing. this is what I mean about I should have been a better advocate about my treatment. I'll have to check the rest. I have chemo brain and just got back from the hospital with my family. My eldest daughter is trying to have a baby. It's just not happening right now. But, I am so flipping tired.
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I too am going "topless" and I work in coffee shop, its been okay for the most part. Most people know to keep comments to themselves. I am only 4weeks from last treatment, Is the white fuzz going to get color? or does it fall out and get replaced by hair with color?
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DV8Q, I'm almost a year out from my last round of Taxotere/Cytoxan. In my case, the thin, white/colorless fuzz I had at 8 weeks post-chemo became the tips of the regular hairs when they grew out. The fuzz did not fall out--it just turned into "frosting" on the ends of the normal-colored hair. I did get it all trimmed off with my first haircut, about 9 months after that last dose of chemo. A month later, I had most of the super-curly curls trimmed off, too, because the new growth was beginning to straighten out (finally!).
otter
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Hi otter, you probably don't remember me but you were one of the first to help me when I began this journey. I want you to know how much that meant to me because I was so scared. I am going in for my second round of chemo on Tuesday. My hair started coming out in clumps about 14 days out so I shaved my head. I didn't think I could manage a wig so I do the scarfs and hat thing. I've become pretty creative with the scarfs but have become hesitant to go out because of some of the negative reactions I get. More often than not the looks of disgust are from other women. My ds has even noticed other women looking at me as if I was trying to make some kind of fashion statement with my scarves. But I continue to go not so boldly where other men have gone before. I know it's going to be a long road because I've just begun. I am just going to have to grow some thicker skin. Thanks for letting me vent.
Nancy
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Nancy, I agree. The looks are always from other women. Even more so when my hair started growing in. Now that it is super short, and I'm not bald, they feel nothing wrong with staring or giving disgusted looks.
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I don't know what it is with these women. Do they feel superior because they don't have bc? Or is it that they think we should hide ourselves away so as not to offend their sensibilities? Maybe, God forbid, IT'S CONTAGIOUS!!! If that was the case, I know who I would spread it too first. SORRY!
Nancy
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After reading these post, Why does it seem to be mostly adults, being so insensitive. I must say for me it hasn't happened to much. But it does. I had a mother, daughter and boyfriend come into Safeway looking for flowers, she was kinda arrogant anyways. She treated me like I didn't know a darn thing. I went into the cooler to get something for her and as I was walking out I saw that she was mocking me how I walked. I was so stunned and lost for words. Her daughter was so embarresed, which she should have been. (I charged her for every little thing that there was to be charged for, things that she thought she would get for free).
For the most part I confront them, "do you have any questions, I'll be more than happy to help answer any that you may have" It also helps that I work in such a public place "Safeway" I also have other issues I have contractures in my fingers really bad. So it really surprise people that I can even design. I had a teeneage young man. Very sweet ask me what was wrong with my fingers and how did I manage to make flower arrangements. I explained to him, he was totally amazed. "I always tell that person thank you for being honest and never be afraid to ask questions. He has been a great customer ever since. What I love most "Is how children can be so honest in asking there questions"
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Heather, how true. I've found children look and ask, or look and forget. My little nephew seeing me for the first time looked (we had prepared the kids ahead of time that this would happen) and I said, "what's the matter, does this outfit make me look bald?" He laughed, and my sister said, "what do you think? Don't you think most outfits would make her look bald?" He laughed and never noticed it afterwards because we were all comfortable with it. Saw me last week, hugged me and said 'heh, you have a little bit of hair" and kept on going. A passing comment was all the importance it deserved. Wish the adults I've run into could be that way.
I had no problem laughing at myself through this. When I first went bald I kept singing that old song about "fuzzy wuzzy was a bear" My husband and I laughed about how fast mornings were with no hair to wash and blow dry and no need to put mascara on absent eyelashes. None of it bothered me until the stares or disgusted looks the growing back in phase has brought. I'll be d----- if they'll shame me into covering my head though. Very much their issue and not my problem.
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What's with the rude people?
I am not completely bald, yet. My first treatment was just over a month ago, and I've had 3 of 8 treatments. I've gone from very long, thick curly hair to thinned-out peach fuzz on top. *sigh*. I usually wear a hat or scarf, but sometimes go out topless. Several people have shared their cancer stories with me, when they've seen me in lines, etc. But the other day, my 9-year-old and I were walking into the post office, and some woman made a rude comment under her breath about my hair (or lack thereof). I stared her down, repeated her comment loudly and clearly, and said that I hoped that if she ever got cancer, she wouldn't have to deal with rude people like herself. If my son had not been there, I would have substituted "stupid B!" for "rude people". Some people are just morons.
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Renee, thanks for the updated photo. I am hoping for uniformed stubble by August 13 when the new school term begins. This is probably a big hope because I still have two more chemo treatments to go! Did I read your post right that you are trimming as you go?
My hair is starting to grow a little and sometimes it is uncomfortable. It seems that the area on the top of my head--where the hair grows straight up--is fairly sensitive to the touch. The scalp isn't sensitive; it is the base of the hair (is that the follicle?) that seems tender. It reminds me of how my hair felt just before I decided to buzz it.
Please don't tell me this is going to be a reverse journey and next my hair will grow back in clumps. YIKES!
Cheers!
Cloud
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Cloud 2 weeks after my last chemo, my head started hurting again, it was so bad I decided to pull on my tiny hair and sure enough, it came off! You're not done chemo so it could still fall before it starts growing. My guess is that you should have something on your head by the new school year. Makes sure you keep you head covered this summer or at least puts LOTS of sunscreen on our head, you wouldn't want a sunburn!
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Hi Ladies. At first I was totally freaked when I lost my hair in huge handfulls. My sister buzzed off the remaining fuzz and I then found a Look Good, Feel Better program. The link below shows you how I over came my fear of showing off my bald head. This is me, 3rd one down on the left. Of course, you will agree, I look a thousand percent better WITH the wig.
http://www.lookgoodfeelbetter.org/women/before_after/looks.htm
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Cloud, it's been 3 and a half months since my last chemo treatment and still on Herceptin. By 3 months post chemo I had a pretty even covering of short fuzzy hair all over my head. At that point I could still see a bit of scalp particularly at the temples where my hair is mostly silver which doesn't cover as well. Since then it has really filled in - I think I could see improvement day by day over the last couple of weeks.
Mine didn't start growing until several weeks after chemo was done and it grew really slowly at first. I did enjoy going bare headed while it grew back. It was spring time and the sun on my head felt so good (I was careful to limit exposure to no more than a few minutes at a time at first. The breeze ruffling through my short sparse hair felt so good too. Now even though it is short I find it keeps my head from getting chilled when I'm some place cold so I'm not wearing hats or scarves any more (except I would wear a sun hat to protect my face, ears and neck if I was in the sun for an extended time).
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I have no idea what I have done wrong I hardly ever wear my wig but as the lady said before in this the looks are too much for-me to handle I am sorry it does affect me I use to have a head full of hair thick pretty now I weigh more and eat no more then I ever did maybe less but it stays on me. I have maybe a 1.5 inch of hair in some places finished chemo 9 months ago I got the shaft on the hair coming back and yes I am glad I am here and so far so good on cancer free but the hair is a worry to me and yes they do give you a sympathy look or a yuck like they would catch it and I am single and tried to keep it private but it got around for sure....its like you are labeled ...
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I go topless all the time and I have never had anyone look at me with disgust. As a matter of fact, get smiles more than anything else. I wonder is it's more about our interpretation of the looks.
Cloud...It wasn't me that trims my hair. I do cut the tops off the single long gray hair when they get unruly.
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Looks like I'm coming back both curly and white, 7 weeks out of the last TX. However, two weeks out, I admit it. I shaved it. Only white ones were growing and I looked like a cross between a tomato plant and a pin cushion. If it isn't going to grow back right, I'm not growing it at all.
You wanna talk about Embracing the Bald? Hubby says as far as he's concerned, I can stay bald. I gotta admit. I'm tempted.
What was it I loved so much about my hair?
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Hey Web.
Would you believe I'm still working my what to say to someone with cancer. I suppose I'm still compiling my research data. This is my dilemma.....what bothers one might not bother another. I think I have it now so time to write.
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Webbie, my DH was the same. He likes this extremely short (5mm) worth of hair that I have now too. I love the ease of it. Just not sure I have the guts for it
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Taken from my blog...........
.........The benefit of choosing bald over wigs and hats is I'm a beacon for all those that have had their lives changed by cancer. Had I not chosen to go around bald I would have missed out on meeting some amazing people and hear about their moving stories. We have an instant bond unlike anything I've ever experienced. It's a sorority/fraternity of people that endured a harsh hazing but graduated with honors and a new perspective on a life we're grateful to have......
This is also my feeble attempt at a BUMP.
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Hi Ladies, I wanted to mention that I've found a most wonderfully comfortable cap. It's a 100% cotton welding cap (of all things...) and they come in pretty wild colors and designs.
It might not work in the 100% bald stage of chemo, but I"m using one in my "still too thin on top" phase post-chemo. http://truckhat.com/Merchant2/merchant.mvc?Screen=CTGY&Category_Code=WH
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