Recovering from breast cancer and...

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I am a registered nurse of 23 years.  I had my mastectomy 3 years ago but only really started dealing with the trauma recently. I wear a prosthesis and elected not to have reconstruction since my surgeon would not do the surgery until 1 year after my mastectomy.  I am in recovery for alcoholism and prescription drug addiction as well.  I have not seen any forum to discuss these issues but I cannot be the only recovering breast cancer survivor who also battles addiction. In AA meetings I have found it difficult to discuss my breast cancer -even with the female members. I do very well with the wonderful coping skills I have learned in recovery.  I would like to hear from other women who share this problem of addiction and breast cancer recovery. Are there problems for which you have no arena to vent? How do you deal with each issue or do you deal with it separately?

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  • MelissaMF
    MelissaMF Member Posts: 26
    edited May 2009

    It's intersting you mentioned your issue.  I just came across someone else with a similar addiction issue to pain killers.  She is called Lursa5 and her note can be found under the forum index section labeled something like 'sugery before during and after'.  Her note was labeled 'To tell or not. Need advice.'  I think you two should talk.  You may be able to help each other out.  Good luck and stay strong.  Your are making to first right steps!

  • marylisa54
    marylisa54 Member Posts: 13
    edited May 2009
    Thank you so much for that information. LisaSmile
  • MelissaMF
    MelissaMF Member Posts: 26
    edited May 2009

    No problem, Lisa.  I have been trying to find someone who has had nerve damage or something like that and found successful treatment.  I don't have the issue of becoming addicted to painkillers because I haven't found a pain killer to kill the pain yet.  I have tried several and nothing kills it.  I have been so frustrated for months now and had months of PT and no success with that either..I actually am worse now!  Go figure!

  • marylisa54
    marylisa54 Member Posts: 13
    edited May 2009

    What kind of nerve damage are you experiencing? I have some damage under my arm even though I did the PT exercises following surgery.  But I don't have significant pain from it.  What is causing your pain?

  • MelissaMF
    MelissaMF Member Posts: 26
    edited June 2009

    Sorry I haven't been on in about a week.  The pain is getting worse and I am getting more disgusted.  The pain is from my inital surgery last September.  They think the nerves are inflamed or something from it.  The pain is in my chest and goes all the way down my arm through my hand. One of the dr's think it might just go away in time.  My PT and one of the pain specialists thinks it might be RSD, which doesn't really go away.  I am going to my primary dr tomorrow to see if he can give me another PT to help me or someone/something.  I am just so frustrated and getting more depressed.  Living with this pain, working full time and having kids that want my full attention as soon as I get home is killing me.  How are you doing?

  • marylisa54
    marylisa54 Member Posts: 13
    edited June 2009

    I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time. What did your doctor say? It is very frustrating to be in pain and have so much responsibility. I hope your doctor gives you some good alternatives. Let me know.  I am doing fairly well. There is no one to talk with about my breast cancer, though. I can talk to family but they really don't know. Now that I have my prosthesis and can wear most clothes they seem to have forgotten that I even had a mastectomy! Which is good. But there are times when I feel stressed and just don't say anything. For instance, I sleep in my prosthesis because I can't stand the awareness of just one breast when I sleep. It probably sounds silly but that is how I feel.  Anyway, I sure do hope you find some help with the pain.

  • MelissaMF
    MelissaMF Member Posts: 26
    edited June 2009

    I can see why you would sleep with it on..you want to feel normal.  You want to feel like your old self again as much as possible.  I totally get it.  I had the lattismus dorsi resonctruction surgery and I hate how I look without clothes.  The surgeon tells me how great of a result it is but it actaully indent and the nipplea area looks huge now that it is tattooed...it looks ridiculous!  I keep referrring to it as a stop sign!  I never finished the final touches due tot he pain I am in...but I can certainly empathize with you about wearing prosthesis to feel as close to you use to as possible.  I went to my primary dr this week.  He said there is defninitely something wrong with me.  He thinks it is RSD and frozen shoulder.  He said I have limited mobility and barely any strength left in my hand.  He gave me to prescriptionns ..one to help me sleep and the other to help my muscle relax...neither worked...I still can't sleep fromt he pain.  I have an MRI scheduled for Monday.  I am still so frusrtrate.  But at least he recognizes something is wrong and is trying to find out what.  I also understand what you mean about your family not understanding...I hear my husbadn on the phone when people call asking about me...he says, 'Oh she's fine, her arm hurts, but she's ok'  on a scale of 1-10, I am at a constant 7!  I wouldn't say I'm ok.  This is driving me insane!  It is so draining and I can't exercise like I used to and I can feel myself getting more depressed.  I am not the person I used to be.  But he thinks everything is ok.  If you ever want to PM me, let me know. I'm here!  God knows I'm not out exercising like I used to be!

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