Average cost of funeral, etc..

THREE florists----made me think: what a small world, then I thought, "Ask how many are/were teachers" & realized that would probably out number the florists by 5X! LOL I was a florist (off & on) for over 30 years- I used to teach adult continuing ed classes on flower arranging & I did shows for other florists (like when FTD has a district meeting? Or a wholesale house has a show weekend.) I don't miss the holidays & working til you are so dead (sometimes 75 hours in one week) you can't enjoy the day with your family....I understand those days are gone.....but I still do flowers for church & weddings of friends (or friends' kids).....

Scattering ashes.....I have asked this b4-but isn't that illegal????? What happens to our envirnoment if EVERYONE decides to scatter ashes? ANything? Nothing? Just wondering.......

Brenda---I think we are twins separated a birth! You always make me LOL & I have yet to see a post of yours that I don't agree with! HUGS

Be well & stay strong

Hi hollyann, I just now saw your post as saint posted there is three of us.  Lately we have been doing a lot of funeral work. Those are bitter sweet. You listen to there stories, you laugh with them and you cry with them. I was told in school that we are not just Florists, but we are counselors. I find that to be very true.

Those of you who are married to a veteran or active duty military person, please check this:

http://www.military.com/benefits/burial-and-memorial/va-national-cemetery-burial-eligibility

At the bottom is a "more" for additional information.   

As the spouse of a veteran, you entitled to be buried in one of over 100 cemeteries, including Arlington National Cemetery.  The cost of the plot or crypt for ashes is free, the engraving and marker are free. 

My husband's ashes are in Arlington and mine will eventually be put there with his. We originally has his ashes in the church memorial garden, but for many reasons we moved them to Arlington.

Many veterans are not aware of this.     

I want a green burial and a HUGE party....... is that too much to ask?

If you store in the garage, can you use at Hallowe'en?

One of my friends did a workshop last summer on green burials and funeral options.  I didn't go, I was in chemo and emotionally raw, and had already decided on body donation.  But green burial would be my next choice after a regular cremation.  If anyone is interested in her sources, I'll ask if she has a list of links, or something.  There's quite a bit if you google "green burials" but one of the biggest parts is that there is no embalming.  Embalming fluid is a horrible chemical to put back into the environment, consisting mostly of formaldehyde, methanol, and ethanol.

Is this the one you checked out, Jeanne?

http://www.greenburials.org/FAQ.htm

There's a list of green cemetaries in different states.  I've read about a few of them.  They are in the woods, among trees, and the aim is to disturb the earth as little as possible, and then return the natural plants.  Green burials require a biodegradable container, and I've heard of using a cloth shroud, a leather container with laces, or even a cardboard box.  The point is to allow the remains to go back into the earth, not to prevent it by using embalming chemicals or a steel vault.

I admit that I am torn, even though my decision is made to do a body donation.  It means that I will be embalmed, because the body has to be preserved in order for it to be used in teaching and reearch.  And then, it will be cremated.  So, I feel like I have weighed the benefits of both choices and I think that the good of scientific research trumps the environmental neutrality of green burial.  I think I would choose cremation over burial anyway, even if it is green, unless I could be buried in the woods behind my house.  I don't think that's going to happen, though.  Too many regulations against it.  Though, in some rural areas they still have family burial plots that are in use.

Embalming was not used until fairly recently, and it's not really necessary with modern refrigeration.  But it's one more huge charge for the funeral industry, and no one thinks to question it.

Guys, I'm loving all the suggestions. Costco caskets....LOL!  Our tiny rural community actually has its own casket store. I crack up every time I pass the sign, but I know that they are performing a valuable service to people by charging very little overhead.

I've come to the conclusion that I just plain can't afford to die, so I'll have to wait till our financial situation picks up.  Whaddaya think?  ;-)   I really don't care what happens to my body, but I want my kids and family to feel comfortable with however things end up.  I have been offered a plot at my in-laws' church, so at least that's covered. I wonder if dh could sneak in there some night and bury me in a hefty bag? LOLOLOLOL....

I just want everybody to celebrate rather than grieve and, as a control freak, I wish I could be there to direct the "show"...

((((HUGS))))

Diane

Our church has a memorial garden and it's pretty reasonable to have your ashes buried there.

When my MIL passed we had the funeral home FIL had been at pick her up and cremate her. Then we had a memorial later at church. 

The other folks at her retirement community were all over us about having used the funeral home we did. They knew at least two others that cost less.  At the time we weren't ready to have MIL traveling all over town looking to save a few hundred bucks on cremation!

I think it's best to have it all organized because if your loved ones aren't sure what you want they will get sold something by the home. 

One of the best things for us was when we put a post board of photos of her life together. It was very cathartic and a bit like a science fair exhibit board. I wouldn't pick the photos for your board, but you might gather lots of photos up so they all have representative photos to pick. Everyone will have a different favorite one. However I think it's totally fair to only include flattering photos of oneself.

I saw this on a newpaper chat room and saved it thinking I'd made a playlist with all these. I figure until I go I can work out to them

Song / Artist
Free Bird - Lynard Skynard
Ring of Fire - Johnny Cash
Franklin's Tower - GD
A Case of You - Joni Mitchell
Yellow Ledbetter - Pearl Jam
Skating Away - Jethro Tull
Turn, turn, turn - The Byrds
Dust in the Wind - Kansas
I can see clearly now
Good Riddance - Greenday
Hotel California - Eagles
Bohemian Rhaspsody - Queen
Walking on Sunshine
In-a-gadd-da-vida - Iron Butterfly
Send Lawyers, Guns and Money - Warren Zevon
End of the World as we know it - REM

 

Hey Badboob, Hefty's not recyclable!  How about one of those huge paper lawn cleanup bags instead?

LOL Brenda...I *knew* the hefty bag would get me in trouble, but I couldn't think of any green bags! LOLOLOLOLOL

And a big "HIYA" backatcha, Saint! Hope the rads do the trick.

((((HUGS)))
Diane

Just had to put in my two cents here...Just saw a show on History Channel about forensics and a body lab in Tennessee......People donate their bodies to science so they can learn how to tell how long a body has been out in the open.....Well anyway at the end of the program it talked about Natural Burial...Meaning no coffin just burying like in the old days......I think this appeals to me greatly......It is legal only in cemetaries so you may want to check it into..I know I plan to......

Caskets from Costco?!!?!  I am loving it.  Dual duty....before they put me in it?  Fill the casket with ice and you've got a great big beer chest!  Oh, and you could have one end closed and use the surface area for cutting up the limes to go in the Coronas.  And put speakers in the casket so we can listen to Margaritaville.  Y'all's funky mood is catching!

Great thread!

Love y'all,

Bethie