Starting Chemo February 2009?

Michele-Gosh you are having such a rough time, I hope everything gets resolved and you can feel better.  I had some heart issues too during treatments and my onc. ensured me it was the chemo drugs and not me. I would feel my heart skipping beats while I was resting, really freaked me out! Every now and then I still feel a flutter.

Kerry-I thought vascular invasion meant the cancer cells have broken thru to the surrounding tissues within the breast?  I had both vascular and lymphatic invasion on my path report, which was also one of the reasons for the extra chemo after surgery and the radiation.

Speaking of , I start my rads on Monday.  Today I had my ct scans and bone scans. Did I mention how much I hate scans??!!!!  Just the anxiety of waiting to hear the results, aghs.

Well ladies try and have a nice weekend. Not sure what your weahhter is like but over here in NJ it's supposed to be warm and 70's!

Kerry-If I don't hear from my onc.'s nurse in the beginning of next week, I'll get the results at my next appointment with him on Thursday. I still need to have the Pet scan done also next Tuesday. Yah more radiation to the body...

I have to take a pic of my hair. I'm not sure if it's growing back yet... it's kinda patchy!  It didn't fall out all the way on the Taxotere so I do have some "hair" and some bald spots  It does seem like this time it's coming in slower and different, there's some waves on the top and I've always had pin straight hair.  After the AC done it came in so nicely and even and straight. I'll keep you posted!

I am officially calling myself out of the chemo-HOLE    It is 70 degrees here and I have been wondering around Walmart with my marvelous sister who had surgery Wednesday (ablation and a D&C) making fun of each other for 2 hours straight. We looked like my Gran and her Sister and all we could do was laugh at each other walking slower than the other.   It was just what I needed.  My 3 yr, old was an angel the entire time and only asked for a Soda   I got  some bandana's and 2 hats and of course a big pair of earrings.  Of course now that I am feeling a little better I am almost ready for round 5  

From what I understand vascular invasion is that it is seen leaving the blood supple coming from the tumor.  I know that I didn't have it but it didn't matter of to chemo. I had to go.   

 Oh Susan (bighugs) waiting for scans is the worst and I am a pain in the A$$ until they call me.  Oh and I am another one who wants to see your hair.   I'll show you mine...lol...

Hi ladies...I've been quiet cause I've been soooo down and don't want to spread the low. I don't know why, but I seem to be very sensitive to drugs. I started developing neuropathy slowly after my last treatment (Mar 26.) From burning, numbness, and tingling in my hands and feet, I started experiencing itching all over my body. That developed into hives --then my legs and fingers started swelling --this was all over Easter weekend. It seemed things would get somewhat better during the day, then worse at night. I called in again on Monday night and the folks on call had me just keep doing benedryll and come in on Wednesday, which was to be my fourth and final TC tx. I also had one asthma-like episode and used my husband's inhaler. I started my pre-med steroids on Tuesday and the rash improved some, but was still pretty evident on Wednesday..the swelling of the legs had gone down leaving yellowish-green bruises just under the skin (from scratching?) So I did not get my last tx. My nurse called in an oncologist who referred me to a dermatologist who gave me some steroid cream and referred me to a pulmonary specialist. According to her and the tests they had me do, I have now developed asthma. The other specialists suspect  that my symptoms are allergic reaction to chemo, even though it has now been more than 21 days. Of couse, as soon as I stopped taking the steroids, rash came back last night. Hoping it is finally done...

So now I'm scared what it means if I don't get to finish my treatment and equally scared to try any more or anything else! Just not feeling good --I am not sunshine to be around! And I will be going back to work on Monday --where I am very tired of well-meaning folks telling me how good I look (and I worry that they think I am mallingering...(sp?))  Anyone else have an allergic reaction so late after treatment? ... I did have an immediate reaction to the Taxotere during my 2nd TX, but they stopped, gave me meds and slowed the drip so I got through...

Datadrudge,

I am so sorry to hear about your reactions, but so glad at the same time.  Thought I was the only one this sensitive to the meds.  After my first dose of Taxol, I ended up in ER with heart rate of 188, had a slight cough, chest tightness and shortness of breath.  So yesterday we switched to Abraxane instead of Taxol, so I could skip the premeds as onco believes this is what caused the tachycardia.  So after two minutes of Abraxane my heart jumped to 160's.  Drip stopped, I was given IV ativan, benedryl and than restarted drip at 1/2 speed along with IV fluids. Admitted to hospital for observation.  Last evening had the cough, shortness of breath and chest tightness...so given IV benedryl.  My face feels like it is on fire and itchy...oncologists still doesn't think it's a reaction to the chemo.....

Oh guys, I am so sorry you are having so many scary problems. Here am I feeling all sorry for myself as I am still achey 10 days out, but it is nothing compared to what you guys are experiencing. Hang in there, I hope your doctors can figure out how to help you manage better. It is true what they say - they come as close to killing us as they can.

I was having a chat to my Pharmasist last Tx - she has just got engaged and we were talking about having kids etc. She said that when she did become pregnant she wouldn't be allowed to work on the Chemo floor. She couldn't even risk breathing the air in the Chemo Clinic as the drugs are so poisionous they could harm the baby, and this is what they inject in out veins. No wonder they cause so many problems!

Anyhow, i am thinking of you, let us know what they figure out for you. 

Michele, Datadrudge, and living4today:  I am so sorry you guys are going through so much.  I had the breathing/heart rate problems with the AC, but not so much with the Taxol.  Some heart racing, but not bad.  I already have asthma, and have not been doing worse with it.  Weird that you can develop asthma from chemo, it never ends.

I have found that taking a Xanax will help slow down the heart rate, I've been using it for years since I already had tachycardia, and deal with a racing heart often (although not as bad as the AC racing heart).  I actually only take 1/4-1/2 a Xanax, it helps with my breathing as well.

Michele, I hope your cardiologist can figure it out for you.  I take Cardizem for my atrial fibrillation (sp?), but it is not really helping much during chemo..heart just flutters away.  I've had it for years, so I am used to the sensation, but I hate it, too.  My onc said there is another drug, I can't remember the name of it, that could help with the heart racing/fluttering, but my cardiologist didn't give it to me. 

Bethie:  I have lots of stubble on top/in front still, but the rest is actually very short hair, so we'll see.  It doesn't seem to be growing much, and it is hard to see since it is white.

It has been so warm the last couple of days, I felt good so I went out and did some gardening and yard work.  Now today I am hitting the wall big time. I had my first twinges of body pain from the Taxol last night, kept waking me up.  Now I am just exhausted, even though I got like 10 hours of sleep last night (not common for me!).  So I am doing nothing today, which bums me out because there are garage sales out there that I really wanted to get to today.

Well, I'm off to go sit outside and enjoy the sunshine.  Here is a pic of my koi in my pond, they are getting really big, like 9 -11 inches long now. 

Beautiful Koi!!  Thanks for the photo!  My pondless waterfall was begun last week, but now it's under a ton of wet snow.  We really needed the moisture so we're thrilled for that.  Next week it's supposed to be in the 70s again.

Michelle:  I so feel for you with all the issues you're having!  Since you're only stage 1, are they considering stopping chemo soon?

Before chemo #4 on Thursday I was told I'm anemic.  Hemoglobin is down to 9.5 so hope it doesn't dump much lower.  So many of you are having such serious side effects, it makes my low blood counts seem piddly.  Sometimes this board puts everything in perspective.

Jaimieh,

I had a bilat mast w/expanders on xmas eve 2008 and yes, I have shooting nerve pain...if I am home or in a private place, I apply pressure on the area and that is the only thing that has helped with the pain...30 days you can do it!!!  (I have 10 more weekly treatments...May is such a busy month, so I hope that will help time go fast and I am going to be a grandma in June...can hardly wait for my first grandbaby!)

Just lost my big long post with individual bolded shout outs and everything! Zounds...no energy to type it all back out. Want to say thanks for all the empathy for us folks with the weird reactions. Bottom line --this stuff is targeted poison and we all react differently. Us extra sensitive folks are just going to have a challenge finding the right mix.

Also...wanted to note that I really don't think I have asthma --I think it is a reaction to the chemo. I'm already breathing free and clear and bet I would pass all the PT tests with flying colors today. Cracks me up when we get rashes, swell up, hearts race, can't breathe, and oncs don't think its a reaction to the chemo. OK...that's interesting. But I'm not a doctor...

I am finally starting to feel more positive again. I think that is one of the greatest challenges...watching my normally somewhat positive, sunny attitude get chemically blasted into doom and darkness. And then...the symptoms subside and clouds clear...I just count on the folks around me to let me know if it goes on too long. Love to all of you...you are all terrific and I seriously do not know what I would do with out you!

Jaimie - I get occasional nerve pain down my arm, also it seems worse with the Chemo. And tingling too, I think it could still be nerves regrowing. I think we forget with all the Chemo mess we are going through how recently our surgery was. If all we had had was surgery, we will still be in "recovery" mode.

Living4today - nice avatar photo! You hardly look old enough to be having grandbabies!!

Datadrudge -  glad you are feeling better. I think the last few rounds really wipe everyone out, physically and emotionally.  One morning last week I just couldn't stop crying, there wasn't even any great reason, just everything sometimes gets too much. I think the drugs and all we are going through just becomes overwhelming. It all seems so unfair sometimes. And I am so much NOT a "why me" type of person, but really, seriously, who would have thought this would happen to any of us?

Anyhow, it was a warm sunny day here yesterday. Finally remember what it feels like to not be cold outside! Had a little potter in the garden, everything is bursting into life which is lovely. The kids had a blast running around.  And I figure in another 4 weeks I should be coming out of the hole for the last time. Anyone can handle 4 weeks!

Hi everyone!  Just checking in!  Hope everyone is doing well. Lots of {{hugs}} for everyone!

living4today~ Love your pic! I was wondering what you look like! I saw the post about the little girl.  How very sad... I'm soooo glad that it is *me* with this and not one of my kids. I can't begin to imagine.

hello you lovely ladies! sorry i dropped off the face of the earth. my first taxotere treatment threw me for a loop. not really badly with SE's - except for fierce exhaustion & lightheadedness & nasty achy-ness. it was more depression than anything else. didn't help that the weather was poopy grey rainy for 6 days straight.

treatment #2 was last weds, and so far, it seems like it knocks the wind out of me on friday. but i still made it in to work thursday, friday and yesterday. i'm trying not to think "cumulative effect" ... trying to think positive ... but it's so hard. being fat and bloated and bald doesn't help. le sigh.

i think i may have felt some tingling in my left fingertips today. i'm waiting to see if it gets worse before starting any supplements.

i see my breast surgeon tomorrow (her first day back from maternity leave, heh!), and hopefully we'll figure out if i should do rads or not. i'm really looking forward to seeing her. she's a very calming influence, and i've sort of been a basket case these past few weeks. i just hope i don't have a breakdown in her office.

(((kerry))) i too keep thinking, last year at this time, i had my breasts and i would've NEVER imagined i'd be going thru this hell. i think that's part of my depression ... the horror all caught up to me at once. meanwhile, i realize i have so much to be thankful for. so i feel guilty as hell for my pity-parties.

(((susan))) do let us know how the rads go tomorrow. i'll be thinking of you.

anywho, i think of you all every day, and i send non-stop continual-loop feel-better vibes to each and every one of you. you are all my heroes. (((everyone)))

silly aside: did anyone catch "grey gardens" on HBO last night? little edie sure had it going on with those fabulous scarves, didn't she?!

Michele-I had an issue with my port also rubbing against one side of my heart causing irregular heart beats so they had to remove it, pull the catheter out and replace it higher.  During chemo I had palpitations constantly, and when I started Taxotere I started having skipped heartbeats. My onc. told me it was the chemo drugs and my body reacting to them, and that I was not having a heart issue.  I sure hope so!

Lisa-Hang in there, sorry you have been having such a hard time. That Taxotere is toxic stuff, rest whenever you can, don't  push yourself. I found if I pushed myself it made me only worse. 

Well ladies I had my first radiation treatment this morning.  1 down, 24 more to go. It really is no big deal. I am having 3 areas radiatied... my supraclavicular nodes, my underarm nodes, and the chest/breast area. Each area takes less then one minute to radiate.  More time is spent on the techs positioning you and the zapping machine.

Ok for those wanting to see the hair growth here it is, warning it's not very attractive!  I sure hope it starts to grow faster cause this weekend we had an 80 degree day and my head under the wig was not very happy!   My hair was weird on the taxotere, it fell out in spots, and some spots didn't fall out like my side burns, they're like 2" long!  but the back of my head has a bald spot like the tops , like an old mans receding hairline:-)

Feel good everyone!  Chin up and know there is a light at the end of that darn tunnel!!!!!!!

Hello from the chemo hole!! I did manage to get to Costco this morning but that's about it. I'm sitting at my computer avoiding my work (they don't know I'm not working anyway). I'm sorry to hear about all the crappy SE's some of you are facing. Chemo sucks. Cancer sucks. There's just nothing good about it. I can't keep the thoughts of my girls growing up without me out of my head. I hate it. I mean, I'm feeling "ok" for chemo. But I was feeling "ok" before surgery & chemo too. I mean, I guess they do call it the "silent killer"....if I hadn't found the lump I'd never have known I had cancer. Damn disease!! Ok, really, I'm ok.....I'm just in the hole. lol I just want to be able to eat something & have it taste normal! 

Susan13...LOVE the hair!!! 

Lisa...don't feel guilty! If ANYONE in this world is entitled to a pity party it's people going through this crap! I wouldn't wish this on anyone. 

{{{JUDY}}}, dang girl...you have been through some serious garbage lately! Hope you're ok!!

Kerry...you need to take some pictures, sounds lovely. Glad your weather is getting nice. We're downright hot here today. So not ready for the intense heat of the desert yet! I think we're getting a reprieve next week though before summer really sets in!

Michele...good to see you around.