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connette
connette Member Posts: 33
edited June 2014 in IDC (Invasive Ductal Carcinoma)

I am not even sure what to type. I had a lump and 3 lymph nodes removed on March 13. The nodes and tissue were clean. However, my appointment with my breast dr. was rescheduled because of bad weather (she is 3 hours away). I saw my ono dr. yesterday. I know that I have grade3/ stage1 cancer. Also, 2 of my receptors are not the good kind. Because I have aggressive IDC, my dr wants to fight it full force. I will need chemo, radation, more chemo and then IV herceptin. In the next week, I am having numerous tests before I begin chemo. I guess what I'm asking is, "Can I do this"? I am so afraid. From what I understand the next year is a journey. Please, if any of you have words of encouragment, advice or ideas, I would like to hear from you. I am a kindergarten/1st grade teacher that will be retiring at the end of this year. (I had planned on retiring before I found out I had cancer. Thank you, Connette

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  • LRM216
    LRM216 Member Posts: 2,115
    edited April 2009

    Hi Connette:  I am Linda, just turned 62 when diagnosed and am in pretty much the same boat as you are.  I take from you post that you are ER-/PR- and 2her+, correct me if I am wrong. I am triple negative and also suffer from the very aggressive negative cancer so my program will basically mirror yours, other than the herceptin - that I won't have being 2her-.  My lumpectomy was done on March 25th and I am on my way to the BS today for my 1st week chkup.  I pray nothing ugly pops out from the path report!  It seems everytime I find something out, it's always negative.  I am afraid too, but we must be confident that we will get through all of this and come out whole.  So many people make it through, even being ER/PR- negative as we are and live long longs.  Most have moved on from the Boards and are living their lives, so are still her to give us newbies the confidence we need to follow in their footsteps.  My biggest fear is being able to work through all of this as I HAVE to.  Retirement?  What the heck is that?  I also raise my 13 year old grand-daughter and being a widow, need to keep on keeping on!  Please know that many more experienced and wonderful woman will be along to take your hand, hold it tightly, while you embark upon this trip that not one of us ever planned on taking.  God bless and  keep posting.  We will all get through this together.

    Hugs,

    Linda 

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited April 2009

    Connette - You can do it ...  just take one step at a time - one day at a time - many of your sisters before you have done it - and you will too.  I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this  - sending you lots of hugs and support. 

    Doreen 

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  • connette
    connette Member Posts: 33
    edited April 2009

    Linda, there are so many things that I do not understand.  For example, theER/PR/,HER.  All I know is that 2 of these are not favorable (the HER is not good, but I don't know if that's a - or +). I just get so confused when my dr's begin talking.  Something shuts down.  Thanks for your message I'm thinking of you and know with determination you will be able to continue your job.

     Doreen,  thanks for you words.  I feel the hugs. . .and back to you they go!

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  • REKoz
    REKoz Member Posts: 590
    edited April 2009

    Hi Connette-

    I'm so sorry you have to be here. It is absolutely a difficult road but know that right now, you are in the worst of it. The beginning is surreal and there is just so much information to learn and try to absorb.And without all the facts, right now you have no plan. Once you do, it will ease your mind somewhat. At least you will know that you are moving FORWARD. We have ALL been there and understand exactly what you are going through. And you are doing yourself such a good thing by finding and participating in these boards. The woman are wonderful and we share the good, bad and ugly.

    I can tell you about HER2 as my cancer also has that aggressive trait. It's a gene that we all have but for some reason, ours has gone haywire and "overexpresses itself." Therefore, it produces more cancer cells at a rapid pace. Good news is that Herceptin is our miracle drug. Before Herceptin (10 years ago), women like us were at the highest risk for reoccurance or metastises(sp). Herceptin has changed that entirely and now many HER pos ladies are living for years cancer free.

    Keep close, ask as many questions as you need to and express all that fear as you are among those that have experienced the shock of this diagnosis. You will learn much and be inspired by those who have gone before you and gotten through it. You will learn that you will too!

    God Bless,

    Ellen

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  • suemed8749
    suemed8749 Member Posts: 1,151
    edited April 2009

    Hi Connette -

    Welcome to this site - I know you don't want to be here, but it's good that you're here to get support and advice - and sometimes just to vent to people who "get it."

    You're where I was about 15 months ago - feeling completely overwhelemd by pathology reports and the challenges ahead. I, too, had bad news about my hormone and Her2 receptors, plus my surgeon couldn't get clean margins after a lumpectomy and re-excision. I had a mastectomy in March, did chemo from April - July, finished my reconstruction with a silicone implant in October, and have been getting Hereptin every 3 weeks.

    Looking back, the surprising thing is that the time DID pass and I DID have a life during all of this. I'm a high school teacher and I worked through two months of chemo (taking off 4 days every 3 weeks), I managed a few trips during the summer, and I'm probably a more thoughtful mom and wife.

    Can you do this? Of course you can! If you possibly can, take someone with you to doctor's appointments - all of this is so overwhelming, and it truly can boggle the mind. Plus when you begin treatment, you'll have more questions about that, so write your questions down beforehand and take notes if possible.

    Try to find the movie Living Proof - it aired in November on the Lifetime network. It's about the doctor who developed the drug Herceptin that you'll most likely get if you are Her2+.

    Wishing you all the best,

    Sue

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  • connette
    connette Member Posts: 33
    edited April 2009

    Thank you all for taking the time to share.  This thread is my new "hope" and "comfort".  My husband is not sure I should be reading everything.  He worries about me and how I try to 'read' things into every medical comment.  When I showed him, your messages he was satisfied that I was in a good place.  I know I have a journey ahead of me.  I will take one step at a time and find my courage here.  Again, thanks for being there.  Bless you, Connette

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  • GramE
    GramE Member Posts: 5,056
    edited April 2009

    Hey "sis". sorry we meet this way.   There are many wonderful ladies here who will laugh an cry with you.  They will share their stories, their triumphs, their worries, and their LOVE, most of all.   We can do it, we do not WANT to do it, but we CAN.  All of the emotions come into play: fear, relief, anxiety, worry, stress, tearfulness, exhaustion, loss of faith, renewal of faith, lonliness, etc.

    Let it out, Be extra good to and for yourself.  YOU are the most important person in your life.  Try making a silly, goofy smile in the mirror each morning.  They say it gets the good endorphins going.  Put the worry aside for just a few seconds and have a happy thought or 2.  

    One step at a time, one breath at a time. one day, one week.  Deal with the immediate, the here and now.   HUGS and Blessings,   Nancy 

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  • nelia48
    nelia48 Member Posts: 539
    edited April 2009

    Hi, Connette!  Sorry you had to join us here under these circumstances, but it is the best place to be.  I wondered at first, too, if I should be reading all this stuff.  But I must say, I finally feel that I'm not alone on this journey because there are so many wonderful people here.  Just remember that everyone's journey is a little different.  We are all at different stages, we all react differently to the chemo and drugs, etc.  We can all do the reading and learning as to what are specific cancer is, and then decide if we have faith in our doctors and follow what they recommend for us.  I've learned so much in the short time I've been here.  It has made me more alert when listening to my dr.s.  And it has given me more intelligent questions to ask.  There were times I felt so stupid in the dr. office when I had NO questions and NO reactions to anything because I just didn't know what to ask.  I just followed everything they told me to do.

    Nancy is right --- take just one step at a time.  Enjoy to the fullest every good day, every good minute.  There will be bad days, days when you feel like road kill, etc.  But you WILL get through it all, I promise.  I did!

    Cora

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  • flash
    flash Member Posts: 1,685
    edited April 2009

    You will get through it.  You have a large family of sisters (and a few brothers) here.  this is a great site and you will find it helps you a lot.  NEVER fell any reluctance to ask questions or state how you feel.  It is very important that we support each other.  Good luck to you.

    flash

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  • marshall2000
    marshall2000 Member Posts: 110
    edited April 2009

    connette: Good Morning new sister! We have all been or are where you are now ( I misspelled a word and had to go back and change it, seeing as how you are a teacher and all LOL) I actually can spell without any difficulty, just can't type worth a hoo-ha. These boards are a literal life saver, as you will find that everyone here is supportive in a way that no one else can be, unless they have been there done that. I was dx in january and started chemo in middle of march, i don't have the same dx as you, but I am getting DD AC, I have continued to work 13 hour shifts(3-4 days a week) in a busy ER, am i tired? YES! Can I do it? YES! My best advice is to take any offers of support, food, rides to the doctor, etc. Another thought is to try and schedule your chemo towards the end of the week so that you can take full advantage of your weekends off to recoup some. Good Luck, Michelle

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  • connette
    connette Member Posts: 33
    edited April 2009

    Good Morning Sisters,  I really appreciate all of your comments. Yesterday, I had a kidney test. Next week I have numerous tests, see my drs, and have my 'port' put in. I think they are doing these tests as 'beginning markers' so they can watch what the chemo does to my body.  Do you agree?  I think I will be starting chemo in about 2 weeks.  I'll know more after I see him (Dr) again.  First time, was just over load for me.  The emotions I feel are like a roller coaster.  This site keeps me on track.  I read the same messages over and over. I hope all of you have a good day. Hugs, Blessings, and Happy thoughts.  Connette

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  • bluedasher
    bluedasher Member Posts: 1,203
    edited April 2009

    Connette, when you go to the oncologist next week, it would be a good idea to take someone with you who can take notes and help you remember afterwards. There is a lot of info and it can be overwhelming. You can also ask the doctor for a copy of your pathology report. There is info on this site to help you understand it.

    Since your onc has said you will be getting Herceptin, you must be HER2+. Being HER2+ use to be bad news because these cancer cells are very aggressive. But now Herceptin works so well against this receptor that it is now good news. And Herceptin doesn't have a lot of side effects. Now that I'm done with chemo and getting just Herceptin, I haven't noticed any side effects.

    Yes, they do tests now to get a baseline of where you are and also to check that your body is okay before they start chemo. 

    I'm a bit surprised that you have been told you will do chemo then rads and then more chemo. With stage I or II, it is more typical to do chemo  then rads and then you are done except for continuing the Herceptin for a year (and hormone therapy if you are hormone positive). 

    Do you know which chemo are they suggesting? Usually for HER2+ it will be either AC-TH (adriamycin and cytoxan followed by taxotere and herceptin) or TCH (taxotere, carboplatin and herceptin). There is a thread on the HER2+ section of these boards that discusses the choice between these two.  I did TCH because the BCIRG study has shown it to be about as effective with less side effects and less risk of heart problems. 

    The couple of weeks before chemo can be kind of overwhelming with all the appointments and tests. But hang in there - this is very treatable, they caught our cancers early and have effective treatments to fight them.

    If you get TCH chemo, there is a very supportive thread titled taxotere, carboplatin and herceptin in the Chemotherapy section of the boards.

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  • vangoghpro
    vangoghpro Member Posts: 47
    edited April 2009

    Hi Connette,

    I am yet another teacher (high school) working currently through chemo (TCH). I am HER2+. I had a mastectomy about six weeks ago and, as everyone has said, the worry is much worse than the actual surgery. I have to say that once I went in the OR they sedated me so quickly I didn't even finish answering the doctor's question. It took less than 2 hours and I only stayed one night in hospital. I was up and moving within hours and just wanted to get home where I could have a decent cup of tea (I'm British). The worst part was the food and I do remember feeling a little vulnerable as I left the hospital.

    Just look to the future and think of what all the surgery and treatment can do for you and that retirement you dream of. Good luck,

    Linda

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  • connette
    connette Member Posts: 33
    edited April 2009

    I never know how to begin my reply to all of you.  You are so special and God's answer to my prayers for strength.  I do need to watch what I read.  If I go to threads that are futher a long than my experience, I start to worry about everything.

    bluedasher: you asked why I would have chem after my radiation.  I'm not sure.  When I talked to the dr. I was on overload.  At that point, I had my lump removed and was told that my lymph nodes and flesh were clean.  However, I had not had any medical tests. . .blood, ct, etc. . .  that is what I am doing this week and will meet with the dr. on Wednesday.  I am scared about the results and read so much into everything they say (or don't say).  You are all in my thoughts and prayers.  Thanks for your support.

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  • suemed8749
    suemed8749 Member Posts: 1,151
    edited April 2009

    Hi Connettee: I just wanted to wish you well as you begin what, I'm sure, will be an exhausting week of appointments for you. I know what you mean about reading into what they say or don't say - I always felt that the techs were looking at me with great pity after a test because they knew how awful things wereSmile. Just remember that all of this is standard operating procedure as they get your baseline information.

    I hope you have some ways to get your mind off of all of this between tests and appointments this week. Let us know what's going on, but don't wander off into any reading that's too far ahead of where you are. One day at a time is plenty for right now.

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  • connette
    connette Member Posts: 33
    edited April 2009

    Wonderful ladies/friends:  It has been a busy week with all my baseline tests, drs. appointments, and 'port' surgery.  I am beginning to understand some of the steps to beating this beast. But, I am amazed at how much knowledge I lack.  I will begin chemo on Wednesday (Adriamycin/Cyclophosphamide).  4 cycles total (2 weeks on/1week off).  Does anyone have suggestions on how I should prepare for this next step?  On one of the threads, I had read about getting a 'bag' ready to take with me to chemo.  Any ideas?  I know that I will need lots of liquid, but does it need to be water?  What about snacks?  Thank you for suggestions.  I hope that someday, I will be able to help others, like you are helping me.  Happy Easter,  Connette

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  • bluedasher
    bluedasher Member Posts: 1,203
    edited April 2009

    Connette, I'm kind of shocked that they are putting you on Adriamycin/Cytoxan (the shorter trade name for Cyclophosphamide) followed I assume by Taxotere and Hereceptin when you are stage I. I think TCH (Taxotere, Carboplatin and Herceptin) is a much better chemo for our situation (I'm also stage I HER2+). It has been shown to be about as effective with fewer side effects and less heart effect. About 2% of those who start with AC have enough decrease in heart function that they can't get Herceptin later.

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  • Estepp
    Estepp Member Posts: 6,416
    edited April 2009

    Connette.. I am not sure about the other cocktail that bluedasher speaks of, but I am sure it is good too.

    I just wanted you to know I did the Adriamycin and Ctytoxan like you are going to do.. I did well on it... I have had no heart damage so far.. and do NOT plan too...:)

    I was told that the Adriamycin is what knocked the sock off my cancer... ( after chemo.. I had surgery... they could not find and evidence I had even HAD cancer)..

    My tumor was bigger than yours too... so maybe this is why I got the Adriamycin.. either way.. I am one girl.. who is very happy she got it!

    God Bless sister !

    BTW... I was told BY my Breast Cancer team to come to this site for my learning tool. Tell your dh this. This is one site.. you will find the answers to your questions and they will be up to date!

    Laura

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