A little shell-shocked

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Hello,

I am 44 and was diagnosed with PLCIS in Oct 2007.  I had a lumpectomy, insisted on radiation and am now a little over a year into my 5 years on tamoxifen.  As tamoxifen has risks too (including a risk of uterine cancer), I had a pelvic ultrasound this February which revealed ovarian cysts, some that looked "complex"  After a follow-up ultrasound and all kinds of bloodwork, I can say that the cysts are "simple" and not a concern (and my uterus is okay too!).  However, since then (early March) I have been in a state of panic (I take Effexor 75 mg qd).  I am really finding it hard to be postive... feeling like I am just waiting to get really bad news.  I have my 18-month post surgery MRI next month. How does one move on to thinking healthy when there is always another exam on the calendar?

Thanks in advance for your insight!

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  • leaf
    leaf Member Posts: 8,188
    edited April 2011

    Its hard, and its different for everyone, I'm sure.  I kept on getting a new medical diagnosis every 3-6 months for 4 years after my LCIS diagnosis - some  fairly trivial like psoriasis, others pretty scary like systemic scleroderma, and drilling right next to my spinal cord.  It also included a PTSD-like situation. 

    I'm still quite jumpy.  Everyone is different.  For me, it helped to get a talk therapist. It helped to get some biofeedback training.  I'm on sertraline, but I don't know if that makes a difference,but my PTSD symptoms are better than they were 4 years ago.  Many of my traumas happened many decades ago, so it may be hard to break long standing patterns.

    I think one of the symptoms of PTSD is 'hyperarousal' - we're trying to be prepared for whatever is ahead.  

    We all have different needs, so its hard to say what will work for another person.  For many people with trauma, its important not to push them, and let them find their own way, and choose what is best for them.

  • psouillac
    psouillac Member Posts: 3
    edited April 2009

    Thanks so much for your response.   I think that just finally admitting (through posting) that I am scared has helped a bit.  I tend to minimalize/compartmentalize difficult situations in a way to deal with them.  Clearly I am not a strong as I am pretending to be. I did consider speaking to a therapist and wil most ikely follow that route. 

    Thanks again and best of luck to you!

    Patty

  • leaf
    leaf Member Posts: 8,188
    edited April 2011

    If you do choose to go to a talk therapist - I would give this advice: if you don't feel comfortable with the therapist, or if you can't imagine talking to the therapist about your issues, go to someone else. 

    Finding a therapist is a very individual fit.  I suspect if your therapist has problems in the same area that you have problems, and if your therapist hasn't worked them through, they can be blind to what is going on....So you need to fit the therapist, and the therapist has to fit you. My therapist had a trial period - in my case it was 3 visits.

    I am often frightened, and I often do not know of what. Being frightened is only being human - we all have a basic instinct to protect ourselves.  Even worms curl up to protect themselves.

    Its important to find the way that fits YOU.

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