Starting Chemo April 2009

Ladies sorry to butt in, but I just finished 4/AC and 12 weekly Taxol and I lived through it...it's not easy but like someone else said doable! And special note to those on Taxol, my head started getting peach fuzz on about the 7th infusion..........Also I noticed there is alot of crying going on, don't wait around for depression to get worse, get your oncologist to give you either ativan for nerves or xanax or even an antidepressant.........they will not think you're a drug addict..Most of the women on BC.org are on something for their nerves.

And drink, drink and drink more water...You will find that the sooner  you flush it out of your system, the better off you are!

Good Luck and Hugs

Deb

On the note of crying and drugs.  Its human nature to cry.  Fear of unknown is hard...yes drugs will help.  However for those of us who are waiting its hard.  Once its all done we can dry the tears and let go of those fears.  Myself, I fight the fears and know I have two choices, do the treatment or not.  I of course chose the treatment but that doesn't help the fears.  I think many of us have tears not just because of the upcoming treatments...but more the fact that finding out you have breast cancer is a hard one to swollow.  Also, do keep in mind that we all may have different kinds of drugs for our chemo.  In that some of us have the more drastic kinds when others may have the less evasive kinds.  As I had mentioned in an earlier post, knowledge of what can happen is better for me than the unknown.  The net is a good recourse for information on the drugs that the doc has ordered for the chemo.  However I feel its also a good idea to express to your doctor how you feel and so on.   I am a person who wants to know it all...if the effects don't happen then thats a bonus in my book...if it does then I am more prepared for it.  So no matter tears or fears we still laugh, hug and so on.  So here we can cry and let it all out if we need.  So I march on for the wait and if need be do have the drugs on hand to calm the nerves.  For me I choose to take less drugs and face it...not always strong but sure trying.  And when I need additional strength I remember that I am not alone in this...maybe different chemo drugs and different side effects when it starts.  So march on and keep our heads high...and always add some hugs, kisses and tons of laughter when we can mixed into our tears and fears.

oh and Deb-from-Ohio too - thank you for your advice!

Anyone currently on CYTOXAN and TAXOTERE?  What are you side effects?  When did you start loosing hair...or did you shave your hair and when?  How long did it take to start feeling less sickly?

Hugs, kisses, and tons of sunshine to you.

Nadine

To all about crying and coping and laughing:

(Nadine)

I just want to note that I cried because of your words Nadine not because of what we are all going through..You have a way with words... It is the support from the husbands, the family members etc. that make this situation with BC more bearable. It was how that post was expressed.  (very nicely)  Meds are great for some but it is just adding something more to the body to react too and for our body to defend.... I have a hard time taking Excedrin... again it depends on the person and what they need or can handle... On the other hand I have come to find that my BC has taken away the attention that another family member has recieved in the past and that "person" and I are no longer getting along very well... has anyone had that experience?

Sakura: I wish you well on Tuesday and hold that head high.... positive thoughts and prayers are with you!  I cut my very long hair yesterday to a very short cute bob... My daughter is in cosmetology school and she did it for me.... after seeing your hair I thought it was time... I start chemo TACx6/18 weeks in 2 weeks.... Didnt think there was a point in waiting for the hair...

TBB: Thank you so very much.  I just say how I feel.  Sometimes it just helps to vent whats on my mind.  Before surgery the fear was huge, but I kept telling myself that others had went through it and by darn I was going to make it.  Again, after surgery and having a Mast  (left side only) I had a hard time of that, knowing I was now lop sided in my mind.  I felt like a freak.  I got past that and figure I can live with that.  I told hubby the other night, I just look like I had been in the war. 

TO EVERYONE:  How about adding to our topic of things what we are doing to keep our minds busy.  And for those who have joined lately let us know where you live.  Like for me I live in Idaho.  On what I have been doing...I hate TV so thats out other than my one soap that I record and watch, "Young and the Restless".  I started the word search books, I have been working on a crochet blanket, I started making bracelets...I had four black beeds for the dead cancer that chemo will kill, it symbolizes the four treatments I will have~~~pink for BC and white for cancer free.  Its time to be creative and stay busy. 

Many hugs, kisses and good thoughts to everyone,

Nadine

Hi all,

What have you done or what do you plan to do while you are getting your infusions? I'm starting TCx4 on Friday (Nadine54 - there are several of us starting that treatment in April) and have been told the infusion (after all the prep) takes 3 hours. They have TVs, and I have a computer and could watch movies or bring books. I know it will be really hard to concentrate, so any advice you have about good distractions would be great. 

Nadine54--I like your bracelet idea as a distraction. I've had a difficult time functioning this week with the anticipation of the unknown coming up. I had a counselor show me around the infusion suite and have bugged my doc with lots of questions. However, I'm not sure having all that information helps the anxiety. I had bilat mastectomy and read all the lists and bought all the stuff and then found I didn't use most of it and needed different things, so it is hard to know how to prepare.I work outside the home, so that helps as a distraction, but I find I don't get much work done during the day because it is hard to focus.

An oncology nurse said that biotin can help the problems with fingernails on Taxotere. Has anyone tried that?

 Also, has anyone ordered a wig from wigsalon.com? We have a good boutique where I live, but I didn't like the selection there and found a cute one I like on that web site. I live in New Hampshire and while close to Boston, there aren't a ton of places nearby to look at wigs and try them on.  

Thanks,

Hi all, been out of town for the weekend - now I'm back home with 2 days before first treatment and it is starting to feel 'real' ... I kind of can't wait to get it started, but it is scary as well. It was the same for my surgery - while I was in pre-op, with the IV starting to hurt, I just wanted to be anywhere else.

Saw the oncologist again last Friday and decided against the TC vs TAC trial - onc really wanted me to get TAC as my tumor is so agressive and triple neg, so chemo is the one treatment option and we are not risking doing less than is possible. I did get good news that there is no sign of mets from CT or bone scan so I can officially say I'm stage 2. Onc pointed out my bone scan showed significant arthritis for my age - I said I didn't need a bone scan to tell you that - just listen to my knees!

I haven't cried much since the first couple of weeks after my diagnosis - when I did it was when I had to tell other people, or when friends were just so nice to me and I was overcome with emotion (I always cry at weddings and romantic movies...) I don't know if I am really that strong, but I can't change what I am going through, so I've decided to spend as little energy as possible on being down.

Well, on the practical side, I probably have not bought everything I should have - I have 2 more prescriptions to get - a numbing cream (Emla) to put on the port and a high-flouride toothpaste as I won't be able to use the flouride rinse my dentist normally has me use as it has alcohol in it. Stuff I would never have thought of....

I did treat myself to an iPod touch so I will have something to keep me entertained during treatment. I will also take my laptop (the clinic has wi-fi so I will be able to post real time!!) and a book, as well as DH for company. The clinic also has a patient kitchen with snacks and drinks and we are allowed to take our own food. I will be there over lunch for my treatments, don't know if I will be hungry, but I have bought fruit ices to eat during the adriamycin treatment as everyone says this helps avoid mouth sores.

Sakura, hope your first treatment goes well, and keep in touch! 

Hi everyone, I meet with my onc on Wednesday.  Going to have MUGA scan tomorrow.  We should be getting my oncotype score this week.  May sound crazy but I'm hoping it is on the higher side so it is a no-brain decision.  My onc isn't really keen on the oncotype test.  He says it is too new to base a life changing decision on but will leave it up to me.  I will be starting treatment in mid-April.  Most likely going with AC+T then radiation.  I will be having a port-a-cath put in before that so they won't have to pump the chemo into my creepy little veins.  I too had my hair cut short.  Everyone thinks it's really cute although nobody is going to say it looks like hell I suppose.  I have been keeping my friends and family up-to-date on my caring bridge site, take a look if you like.  The link is www.caringbridge.org/visit/sherrimo.  They have found it to be very helpful and entertaining.  It sure beats having to tell the same story over and over again.  Keep you chin up everybody.  Hopefully by Thanksgiving we should be all through this hell.  I'm having a party when I'm done....drinks all around!  Sherri

Just got back from the oncologist, who scheduled me to start my chemo (TAC) on April 9th. I'm almost "ready" (truly I will never be ready and think of this as my date of DEATH, because whatever's still going to be physically alive once this starts, will not be ME!). That is, I'm mostly done stocking up on "chemo survival supplies"-- all I need to do now is (a) fill the Ativan and Compazine prescriptions my chemo nurse gave me today/get the L-Glutamine a bc sister here recommended in a PM, and get the wig and scarf thing taken care of. Need to have my head measured first. So I need to figure out a time to do it/actually get the wig and scarf between now and the 8th, because even though it'll probably take a couple weeks for my hair to start falling out...but being very sensitive about the hair loss thing, I'd prefer having a wig and scarf right on hand here before I actually need them.

ALYAD: Did call on the head wrap and they are going to send one right out to me.  Real nice people. There are no hidden charges and no shipping charges...what a cool deal.  EVERYONE: I encourage everyone to take advantage of this free offer...the selection is wonderful. http://www.franceluxe.com/ 

Well for us April 1st start dates we are quickly approching a new land.  Can't say I am excited about this but know its what must be done and ready to march on.  Been trying to eat everything I love.  Told hubby last night since surgery my taste buds are going nuts, everything tastes good.  Wearing perfume, hairspray and even those nasty smells are enjoyable right now.  Figure enjoy it while I can.  Nerves are hanging in there.  I think my only real problem is the unknown.  We all seem to handle the chemo drugs differently so I am wishing that mine won't be to bad.  But trying to keep the mind busy and just get through it and have it all done.  Think I have figured out what may be needed at home.  There is always something a person needs and its not on hand, but good o'l hubby will have that under control.  I am planning on just taking it as it comes and doing the very best I can and sure counting down the days until I am all done.  I messed around this morning with my hats. Waiting to do anything with the wigs until the wig whatever you call thems come.  Suddenly in the last two days my hair decided to work with me and not against me.  Wouldn't you know it 31 days after surgery and I finally get some coporation with the hair...go figure...just in time to be preparing to loose it.  Oh well can't do much on that.  Still tire easy from the surgery and taking a nap a day and did go back to the anxiety pills before bedtime.  I am doing pretty darn good actually...sure wishing I was heading to a nice warm sunny beach for 13 weeks instead of chemo.  Oh well I guess, will have relaxing music when I want it and when sleeping sure hope I have hair on that sunny beach in my dreams!  So fell April folks, getting ready to gear up for our run at this chemo stuff.  I wish each and everyone of you the very best and also wish everyone to hang in there, we will get through this together. 

Many hugs and tons of sunshine (and those wonderful warm beaches) to everyone!!!

Nadine

Hi again...I haven't been in here for a while so I have some catching up to do.  As if starting chemo on April 14th isn't enough, my husband lost his job last week.  Goodbye health insurance premiums and hello COBRA.  I know I'm not the only one and there are lots of other people in the same boat, but it still sucks big-time.  My best wishes to people starting next week!  We'll all get through this!!!!!

how do you get on the list alyad for the free head wrap. I did not see where to sign up on the web page you posted.

Dear BC Sisters ~

I have "bumped" the thread for tips on getting through chemo. It saved me from many of the se's, largely because I was so well prepared to deal with them thanks to this thread. AND of course to our wonderful ROCK who authored the thread.

Best to you on your journey!

Nico

Hi, my name is Tiffany and I am 39yrs and I will be starting chemo April 10th.  I had my bi-lateral mast. with reconstruction on Feb 20th.  My tests all came back good except for my oncotype score, that was the monkey in the wrench for me.  My score was 27 and I guess with the age factor......not so good.  I just found out that I had to take chemo two days ago, and I will be the first to say it was truly the hardest day of my life so far.  My shirt was soaked with my tears of disbelief, and when I reached my car to call my mom I thought it was Friday, when it was just Monday. I felt as though I couldnt think, it was heartbreaking news, I thought I was free of chemo. Today, I took my children to school ( ages 5yrs and 7yrs ) and came home and slept until 2:00. When I woke up still tired, I told myself, its time to get it together, face the music and even sing with it.  I am going to do everything possible not to give this fear, disease, or chemo any of my joy.  I noticed that my fear was so great it could easily cripple me, and I have to be stronger than my fear.  We are all starting this together and hope we can stick together for one another thru this trying time.  Family and friends can be great, but it is impossible for them to truly understand what were feeling and going through.  I am thankful to have a group of women like you behind me.