Need some support - high anxiety

I think you're normal.  As normal as we can be after the trauma of diagnosis and treatment.  The first year or so after treatment ends is pretty rough.

Try not to freak...that's a "sicko" cancer joke.

What you are feeling (anxiety-wise) is normal, as far as I know.

I think it is good to voice your concerns and stay in touch with your body...the probabilities are that it isn't cancer...if you have pain, symptoms that last longer than 2 weeks...well, you probably need to get it checked out.

My sympathies.

Tammy Lou

Well anyone would worry with lumps and liver function (btw I have that too). The lip thing is probably from the anxiety. B.C. is a huge shock to your well being. It shakes you to your core. Makes you think of death and the consequences for your family. All this is emotionally taxing. My guess is that you are having a hard time sleeping as well.(I know I do)  The Truth of the matter is that you caught the cancer early and you yes you have an excellent prognosis. Now let that sink in all the way in. Some times it feels that we can no longer trust our bodies that they have somehow betrayed us. Let me tell you this. We need to change the emotional environment. I mean discipline your mind to keep positive. When scary thoughts come into our mind change the internal subject.

If you by some freaky and I do mean statistically rare you have a recurrence or mets. Deal with it then be surprised do not live as though it is a reality.

I think I got carried away sorry. Maybe I said this for myself as well. I promised this is said with good intentions.

Stay cool and be good to you.

Hi - you've done exceptionally well considering you've only posted 7 times on this web site, so don't feel bad - look at how much complaining I've already done. You are ALLOWED to become a "sniveling hypocondriac" now and then considering what you've been through! I am convinced that because I have a short life-line on my left hand that I'll die before I'm 60 (like my dad).......yet, you can see from my dx signature that I have an excellent prognosis. I go for days and days when I feel fantastic, then suddenly, my back will hurt (from not swimming in weeks) and I'm thinking METS! I too have had liver enzyme problems - mine were caused by so many antibiotics that I needed after my MRSA staph infection. I no longer even ask my onc about my liver enzymes - because at this point in time, I trust him and know even if they are a bit elevated, they are still normal. The tingling in your bottom lip could be a sign of a cold-sore coming on. They are caused by the herpes simplex virus - a nasty, opportunistic bug that loves to attack when your immune system is lower. Stress WILL lower your immune system - so try relaxation imagery to help yourself stay calm. Also - have you had your thyroid checked? After starting chemo and herceptin, my thyroid numbers became too low and I needed to go on thyroid meds............one of the side effects of an over or under-active thyroid is tingling in the fingers and toes (my endocrinologist told me so) - women over 40 need to get their thyroid numbers checked every year. Hang in there now.............you'll be OK.........we'll both be finished our Herceptin infusions in April - let's celebrate together! Yay!

Orange1: I have a question for you if I could please. I have only 2% estrogen in pathology. My onc. is recommending hormone therapy. I feel that the side effect would out weigh the potential benefits. Or at least I am not convinced. In the studies that you have read has there been any mention of the cut off for effectiveness. I am 54 years old. I have 30% estrogen left in my endocrine system however that might be gone after I finish chemo. I would love some insight if you have any. Thank you.

MMM5: You know what I forgot to say. HUMOR! Maybe we take everything sooo seriously that we have lost our sense of humor. Last night as I was trying to fall asleep, I was battling a headache. I started thinking that it was brain mets. And then I started laughing because of the post that I had made to you and all the good advise I dished and here I was thinking that the sinus headache was mets. How dumb can I get. Anyway I was thinking that it is a control issue. You had a very important high power position. You made decisions and thing happened. Now you are victim of circumstances out of your control. You can not for see the future and what is in the present is a bit dodgie. It makes us feel sooo vulnerable. Even being bald is such a vulnerable feeling. We could do a anti anxiety drug and you would be able to put more distance (time) between DX and NED. Or we can deal with our fears really deal with them and allay them. Fear knocked on the door courage answered it and there was no one there.

I make no judgment on taking drugs to help get to the other side of anxiety believe me. After I was DX I took Valium about 6 times. I could not control my fears. Not with meditation or relaxation or anything. I did not know if I was stage IV with mets you know the drill. But now I have hope. Lots of it. My outcome is not as favorable statistically as yours but still darn good.

Now I embrace the profoundly healing spiritual dimension of life that we all share and explore the nonphysical dimension of our being that is whole and complete, regardless of our circumstances.

Hi Bold,

I have to say up front, that no amount of reading provides equivalent knowledge to medical school + residency + years of experience that your doctors have.  That said, I have read that even low ER expressing cancers may respond well to antiestrogen therapy, but I have not read the actual studies themselves, only seen it referred to in other articles with nothing specific about cut-off values. (My tumor had relatively high expression, so this is not one of the things that drove me crazy - so I did not do significant reading on this subject)  I personally would stay on the anti-estrogen, especially since your onc reccommends it.  Meanwhile, I'll keep an eye out for articles on low ER expression and effectiveness of anitestrogens.

In my earlier post, when I mentioned that anti-estrogen therapy works for us HER2+ women I was referring to tamoxifen, if we metabolize it correctly.  Her2+ women should only take tamoxifen if they have been tested for their CYP2D6 metabolizer status (your Onc can order this test).  The reason is that tamoxifen is what is called a pro-drug; it is metabolized to its active form by an enzyme in your body called CYP2D6.  It turns out that about 6-7% of caucasians do not have much of this enzyme (and are poor metabolizers of tamoxifen).  Also, about 30% of the population are intermediate metabolizers.  Poor metabolizers and intermediate metabolizers convert less of the tamoxifen into its active form, endoxifen.  Endoxifen is a very potent anti-estrogen.  Tamoxifen is much less potent than endoxifen and in HER2+ cancers, may even promote tumer growth.  That is why its especially important for HER2+ women to get tested for CYP2D6 status if they take tamoxifen.  If we are extensive metabolizers then we're good.  We make plenty of the estrogen blocking endoxifen which blocks any growth promoting properties of estrogen or tamoxifen.  If your're an intermediate or poor metabolizer, then you may not fully convert tamoxifen into its active form. Poor outcomes for HER2+/ER+ women are more likely if they take tamoxifen and are poor metabolizers.  It is theorized that is why some studies show women do better on AIs (because many of the women on tamoxifen aren't getting the full benefit of the active endoxifen - the poor and intermediate metabolizers pull the statistics down for the entire population).  If only extensive metabolizer take tamoxifen, then the predicted statistics show that these women (extensive metabolizers) should do at least as well if not better on tamoxifen than on AIs.  Google "Geotz" and "CYP2D6" for more info.   Or PM me so I can try to explain further.  Also be aware that many drugs interfere with the metabolism of tamoxifen, so if you go on it, you need to be careful what you take with it to ensure that the other drug does not decrease the metabolism of tamoxifen.  Women who are poor or intermediate metabolizer or who have not been tested for metabolizer status should be on an AI instead.  Advantages of tamoxifen over AIs is no achy joints and less bone loss.

The test for CYP2D6 is commercially available and only costs a few hundred dollars.  My insurance paid for it.

Hi Bear1206,

re: hot flashes.  Be careful - some of the herbals touted for hot flashes may be helpful because they have estrogenic activity - the exact thing we need to stay away from.  Some antidepressants decrease hot flashes, but I see you've already tried effexor.. I've also read that clonidine, a blood pressure medicine may help.  The patches may have less side effects than the pills.

 I don't take anything orally - I'm too paramoid because I take tamoxifen and don't want to risk interferring with its metabolism.  So I do the usual - dress in layers, stay out of direct sun when its hot and put up with them.  One thing that has helped me tremendously at night is to sleep with my feet out from under the covers.  I cover my torso to keep my body warm, but as long as my feet stay cool, I seem to have much fewer hot flashes and sleep better.  Also, I sleep in work-out clothes that are made of synthtic wicking material - not cotton.  Cotton just gets soggy, the wicking material helps keep me confortable at night.  Sorry I can't be of more help in this department.

Good weekend to you too.

Hi friends:   I have a question.  Do any of you still drink alcohol and if so can you tell me what you feel about it.   I still do but feel guilty about it.

 thanks for listening