Starting chemo January 2009?

jilly - "cancer didn't make us bald, fighting it did"... I like that....  Sometimes we lose sight of the fact that the drugs are the good guys...

mama - six flags guy... too funny....

marymoir - thanks for the encouragement... I feel better today.. I think I'm turning the corner...

Lisa810 - you are not alone.... I know....surgery is one thing.. chemo is another... but the fear of the unknown is many times worse than the reality....just keep reading in here...you'll see that it's all doable... you can get through it too...

Shocked - compliments from strangers on the wig? Awesome.. what is the brand name?

wow!! DD that is great....I'm gonna try for 1/4 of an inch!!  I am so glad you feel so confidant.  I hate to say it but the last 3 days...I've been secretly dreading doing my hair....got a wig today....I'm ready for Friday.

Finally go my system cleaned out...via a BM....TMI....but I felt like the chemicals just left my body..it was truly rereshing...

Renrel...I feel the same way about the sleeping meds...hate to take them but don't want to risk being awake!!!  That was just awful last week!  

I love Hawaii...but am jealous...what I owuldn't do for a trip to Trader Joe's ot Krispy Kreme.....let's keep the food porn down to a minimum!

(I'm starting chemo January 29th (taxol and avastin) but introduced my chemo in the February thread.)  One of the reasons I got the port was because I am a pianist and I did not want to risk any chemo drugs leaking into my arm outside the vein.. I'm also a diver...  I want to play in the water.... Maybe not that important of a fact.

It was way back three pages but there is a question about heartburn.  I am using plain old Rolaids and that seems to be alI need.

As for food porn, one of my favorite things to eat is roasted radicchio, kideny beans, lemon, olive oil,salt and pepper.  I made that today.  I really miss having salads.  I am going to look in the fridge and see if I can't find a carrot in storage.

dear lisa810 - i have been where you are. i had a bilateral mastectomy on 11/20, with no reconstruction. i was terrified of chemo, to the point of having nightmares about adriamycin almost every night. i spent days and days researching everything possible about chemo and radiation. i cried when i sat in that chair the first time. the first night i had a bad headache from the zofran, but the next morning the doc changed my meds to kytril, and since then i have had no side effects --not even one. i have felt absolutely terrific. i have tons of energy, my appetite has not changed, no constipatation, no taste bud changes, no fatigue. i have tried very hard to take care of myself every single day. i still walk an hour a day.  i go for my second chemo on jan 28th. for the last few months i cried when thinking about losing my hair, but i just kept cutting it shorter and shorter and finally had my hair buzzed today because it should fall out anyway any day now. i love the feel of it!  i don't plan on wearing a wig.  i know everyone is different, but i just wanted you to know that in my case, it has been an extremely positive, pain-free experience so far.

morning ladies...day 15 after 1st AC and i still have hair but i'm getting these little painful bumps on top of my head...they hurt!!!...it's preventing me from shaving it so i've cut it about 1/4 inch all over...i was devastated about losing my hair but i'll have to say that it was pretty nice yesterday to shower...dress...tie on a pretty scarf...and go in record time!....that is definitely a positive to this baldness thing...i'm feeling really good and can't wait to hear from you AC ladies who are a few days ahead of me for your 2nd tx...i've been real proactive on the constipation and mouth sore thing...so far constipation hasn't been a problem...i've been using biotene toothpaste and mouthwash but this morning i think i feel a couple of mouth sores starting...i'm using salt and baking soda rinse but wondering if there's something else over the counter i can use to get on top of this!...i've read about the benadryl and maalox...is that to prevent...get rid of...or just help to feel better?

all you women enjoying beautiful weather are so lucky!...we're having an icestorm here...i'm a single woman...moved from the city to a cabin in the country to write a book and boom....cancer!!!...it's a winter wonderland outside my window this morning...i'm so glad coffee still tastes good...when do taste buds go?...

you ladies have a nice nice day...i'm going to gilda's club for an organic cooking class!... 

ddlat - isn't it liberating to go bald?  I know it's not for everyone but I haven't worn a scarf or the wig I thought I desperately needed at all.  My son and SO love how I look and are proud to be out with me.  That's my long haired son in the pic with me. 

ALO - I eat salads reguarly - they keep me regular - lol.  The only thing my onc said to avoid was grapefruit but to eat whatever tastes good.  I can't do coffee the first week after a treatment but then it tastes so good.  Also, someone told I wouldn't be able to eat spicy but I eat spicy everyday so no problem at all with that.  I love greek yogurt and that helps with any yeast problems and gets you the calcium you need.  We aren't much for meat so it's mostly fish and sometime chicken or turkey.

Glad everyone is sharing experiences - I have learned so much on here.  Love and luck to everyone.   My next treatment is Feb 6.  Starting that old anxiety again.

Bobbi

Hi all:  Went to work yesterday in my wig.   I hated every minute of it and could not get it off fast enough when I got home.  I found it difficult to look anyone in the eye. Everyone said it looks great but it feels so fake.  One of the kids told me my hair looked funny!!!  Out of the mouth of babes.  I guess I will get use to it as I really have no choice do I? 

Yesterday was day 4 after 2nd treatment and I just barely made it through work.  I teach a p.m. class on Mondays - just 3 and a half hours and I struggled through the last half hour.  The yucky feeling and tiredness seemed to take longer to hit this time.  After first treatment I was ok first day, wiped the second day.  This time I was ok first two days and wiped the 3rd and 4th.  Happy to report the cumulative thing did not happen.  My SE were not worse this time than last.   Of course, it  wasn't until day 5 I ended up in the hospital so I am still keeping my fingers crossed that that does not happen again.

Funny how we all end up having a hard time with diffient things and we don't really know what they will be until they happen. I personally was not at all worried about being bald and now it is really hard for me to deal with.  I have not even let my DH see me without a hat yet.  I have a couple of those little stocking cap things like they give newborns. Very comfortable for sleeping and keeps me warm.

Having our first snow of the winter here in Maryland so I have today off from school!  Probably tomorrow too!   Thank you God I can use the extra time off....

Patti

ladyjane - you are NOT going to the hospital again... you already did that.... (that's so "last month")   I'm glad to hear the SE's really aren't worse than last time... enjoy your snow days!

chrisbern - ahh! yes!! not cumulative!! Keep posting stuff like that so all of us behind you don't convince ourselves it's automatically worse each time... that's great to hear!!!

Anybody? Re: the Neulasta shot ... Day 7 and now 8, all the sudden I get this throbbing weird spine butt bone pain that throbs very strangely... like a central nervous system issue... is that how you would describe the "bone pain" associated with the shot.... any input here would be appreciated... it's the weirdest feeling... not achey but throbbing and weird....(triggered when I move.. if I stay still it calms down) ?

Lisa810 - first take a deep breath and perhaps an Ativan (or ask your onc for something else that can help in calming your nerves right now.  We've all been there in this group, and we are all surviving.  Side effects are different for everyone - some have lots, some have few.  Wait and see how you are.  Drink tons of water before your first tx, take pix of your kids or your dog, or something to remind you WHY you are fighting this fight and you WILL get through it.

You may want to check for a local BC support group or call the American Cancer Society and ask them for a couple wig referral places.  There are wonderful online suppliers, but I would worry a bit about the fit.  My local hairdresser (from an ACS referral) also styled my wig when it came in - I think thinned it, cut it to my style, etc.  There are some really awful wigs out there - the first place I went to look at them - awful!  But then researched a bit more and figured out I wanted one that looked like my scalp (hand tied synthetic).  My insurance doesnt pay for mine - but I figured I am worth it - and I am going to be wearing it for probably the next year!!  Mine is comfortable and I wear it every day except maybe Sunday around the house, when I wear a cap with bangs underneath (from TLC Catalog). But others have found they like scarves and hats and no wig....you will make the decision that is best for you.  Universal throughout the postings - we almost all have the same reaction to losing our hair.  And I pray the next ten years research will result in controlling that side effect as so many others have been controlled.

I was ok through surgery and recovery, but it was the day after chemo that did me in - all of a sudden it was real.  And then my SE's were not bad, but three weeks later, there goes the hair!  And now I look in the mirror and I LOOK like a cancer patient!!!  So I've added big trashy earrings to my look and more eye makeup!!

Keep in touch - let us know how you are.  And just keep telling yourself that "I can do this" and  you can.  You are a tribute to those who came before you and those who will come after you!

Brenny

Re: salads.  It's interesting that we all get different messages on that.  My dietician didn't rule it out...just said to wash, wash, wash...

That said, I'm not really digging anything crunchy right now, even cooked.  It's contributing to my heartburn.  I'm all about soft, comfort foods (mashed potatoes, pasta).  Not good for the waistline, but hey it's winter anyway.

Hi Group,

 I am triple negative and had right breast removed 12/17/08 and first chemo TC on 1/14 and it hit hard the bone pain lasted for 5 days staight after my nuelesta shot so I am not sure if it was the chemo or the shot. I still have all my head hair 13 days out but the pubic hair is shedding like crazy LOL, not a cute picture, My head itches and tingles like crazy, it fells like I have bugs up there. I haven't had n/v but the fatigue is unreal sometimes just walking to the kitchen gets me all winded. I see alot of women working thru this and kudo to you strong ladies. I am a hospice nurse and am more afriad of my patient giving me thier germs than anything so I am going to live of savings and family (smile) for awhile because I don't have the energy to walk those halls and care for others at this time. I am so glad I found this site, it is a good source of information and support, I don't feel like I'm all alone in this fight for life. I am dreading the hair lose because my hair is already short I hope it won't be a total shock with the new look and I don't want a wig they itch to me. I am also second guessing reconstruction after hearing some stories and I really don't won't to go thru a long healing process agian if I can help it but I will see because I haven't even seen a PS yet but I did have skin spraring surgery and I wish I had not, honestly I wish I would have had both removed and went flat.  Good luck and healing to all.

 I had my first chemo treatment Fri., Jan. 23. It wasn't that bad.The nausea  was bad the first night. The shot really did me in. I was in so much pain for 2 days, I could barely move around. I'm ok now. What I want to know is how long is the fatigue supposed to last? I'm tired all the time. I sleep ok. Also my breast is very swollen. Does anyone else have this symptom? My second chemo is Feb. 6th. I won't be having my surgery till summer. I did order a wig from a place that specializes in women with cancer. She is going to cut my hair. Not sure if I should shave it, makes more sense if I do, cuz its going to fall out anyway. I still get emotional about this whole thing but I am keeping my spirits up and all of you women should too. Take care.

The fatique is getting to me.  I picked up DS from school yesterday, set him up on the tv and went up to bed to read and rest.  I had DH make dinner for the two of them and said I would eat later.  In the middle of dinner however DS needed to go potty.  He has trouble pooping (like many of us now) and had not gone in a few days and wants me to sit with him and read to him when he goes.  Yeah he has me wrapped around his finger.  He is capable a reading to himself but at 5 I will still read to him almost as much as he wants, which take huge amounts of my evening time.  So he went very quickly but I finished the big book I had picked out in case and then joined them for dinner, though I ate pita and various dips rather than meatloaf (had the meatloaf for lunch today).  During dinner DS tells me that he wants to cuddle with me but that it is OK because breast cancer is not contagous between adult and kids just adults and adults.  So we tried to explain that cancer is not contagous at all.  We explained that I was eatting something different because the medicine makes food taste different.  So DS suggests I try eattng foods I don't like.  I smiled and told him that is exactly what the book said to do.  That made him feel pretty smart (he feels that way alot ) But then he kept trying to get me to name foods I don't like so that he could try to get me to eat them. 

After dinner I was drained and just wanted to go to sleep but it is hard to extract from a 5 yr old.  Then I realized I was out of sanitary napkins and DH had to go out at 10:30 at night looking for them. I felt so guilty.  He had to go to 5 places and he really needed a good night sleep.  But at least we both slept through the night.  I took an aleve and only woke once to use the bathroom due to my period.   But I still woke tired.  Took me from 9am to 11am to shower, dress, eat breakfast and talk to my nurse on the phone.  But then I got DS to school stopped buy the pharmacy and TJ made myself eat some lunch and did some straightening up around the house.  Not a ton but I am not much of a housekeeper.  I got a call from the cleaning servie the Ellifund is granting me today. I am going to schedule every three weeks for hte Monday after chemo, when my blood counts are the lowest.  That will take me through most of the treatment.  

I have a few mouth sores today. I am prone to them. Just small clear blisters. They don't hurt but are annoying.  Sortly after I was diagnoised wtih BC I had a huge breakout of sores in my mouth like I had never in my life had.  I had one about a 1/4 by an inch on my tongue that my dentist wanted to take a picture of.  She said it was herpies but my Onc nurse thinks it may have been an alergic reaction to bactim because the first time I took bactrim around that time I had a g-d awlful sore throat within an hour and the second time I broke out in these sores.  But having had those at least I feel that I can deal with them if I have to.

 I am in a rotten mood today.  Just have conversations in my head where I beat myself up.  I am both in the conversation and observing myself having the converstation.  I am trying to let myself be where I am without lettting myself go to far over into a bad place.  The observer is trying to figure out what part of my tirade is based on true perception and deserving of some life changes and what is just misperception and cancer and fatique ect.  

I need to go fill out my Long Term Disablity Form. That was my piority for today and I have not touched it.  

Renral....hang in there..tomorrow WILL be better!!!!!  We're hear to listen!!!