scared of blm and recon wont work

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Lynne3times
Lynne3times Member Posts: 53
edited June 2014 in Managing Side Effects of Breast Cancer and Its Treatment

I am new to this forum and after being diagnosed for the 3rd time w/BC have opted to do blm which is sched for Jan 27.

1st diag, age 31, medullary ca, stage 1, right breast, lumpectomy & radiation

2nd diag age 44, medullary, stage 1, left breast, lumpectomy & radiation

3rd diag, age 49 dcis on right breast, stage 0, scheduled BLM on Jan 27th

It's funny, prior to this, I never felt the need for support and did VERY well both times even though the 2nd time was scarier because between my 1st and 2nd diagnosis my mom had passed away due to BC. I always felt lucky that it was found early and was treatable and that I was able to keep my breasts.

This 3rd diagnosis has turned my life upside down. Naturally, I am scared of blm, but I think what has me more worried (if that is possible) is that due to radiation on both breasts w/the medullary, I know I have a higher risk of implants not working. I have no tummy fat so that option is out. My PS said our backup option would be taking muscle from back if implants failed. A part of my brain wants to keep one breast in case the implants don't work but I really don't think I could deal w/a 4th diagnosis. I am just so scared of the reconstruction not working. Has anyone been through radiation where implants DID work. Thanks to all for listening.

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  • wallycat
    wallycat Member Posts: 3,227
    edited December 2008

    I am so sorry you are joining here once again.

    I know your fears, as many of us here have experienced it.  Just sending virtual hugs.

    I was not very attached to my breasts and even though lumpectomy was offered, I opted for bilateral mastectomy---for the reason you mentioned; I don't know if I could deal with watching, waiting, and a possible dx again.  I have had no reconstruction and don't regret it at all.  There are days that being flat is very appealing (when I exercise, sleep on my tummy)---after lugging around 34Ds, it is only occasionally that I miss them.

    Best to you and I hope your implants work out.  I know there are several types of surgeries available (TRAM, DIEP) so hopefully one of these would be do-able  if you find implants not do-able.

    I will add that Allure magazine had a small article about a new implant being offered...they are in trials in Israel (or maybe it was someone in Israel developed them).  They are like a honeycomb so much lighter and no risk of rupture (and having to replace them after 6-10 years).

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  • roseg
    roseg Member Posts: 3,133
    edited December 2008

    People have pretty good luck with the lat flag reconstruction. I think you'd likely be happy with that. I don't know if I'd try implants alone after radiation because I've read so many unhappy stories of gals who have infections afterwards.

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  • whippetmom
    whippetmom Member Posts: 6,920
    edited December 2008

    I am going to forward your message to someone on these boards who has the same history as you with prior rads with lumpectomy and then recurrence and bilateral mastectomies.  I know she would be happy to discuss her experience with you. She had the latissimus dorsi flap with implants and her breasts are gorgeous!  You can see them on the pictures forum. There are others on the pictures forum who have had this procedure as well. 

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  • car
    car Member Posts: 492
    edited December 2008

    Check out http://breastreconsruction.org.There are a lot of options.

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  • Linda54
    Linda54 Member Posts: 2,689
    edited December 2008

    Lynne

    I sent you a PM.

    Linda

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  • smerf
    smerf Member Posts: 615
    edited January 2009

    My ps said that after radiation, he often uses skin grafts if a women wants to try implants. I've had a lumpectomy {partial mastectomy} with chemo and rads, but if I could do it over I would have had the mastectomy. For me, the mammograms and constant concern about local recurrence is not worth saving the breast. I would have had to have rads even with a mastectomy, because my tumor was so close to the chest wall, but at least there would be no more mammograms! I've had recalls three times since my treatment, and they are always very difficult.

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  • Lynne3times
    Lynne3times Member Posts: 53
    edited January 2009

    Hi smerf, thanks for posting, what is a recall, a re-excision? If so, that stinks. My tumors were all close to the chest wall. They are always on the periferals of my breast for some reason.

    I was of the opposite mind frame, the first two times I would have done anything to save my breasts. This 3rd time, there is no saving the one and as it gets harder each time, just dont want to have to do it a fourth time so doing the blm.

    I got in touch with the local Gilda club and spoke with a social worker there who know of a woman with similar situation as mine and was going to locate her so she could call me. This very sweet woman called me a couple days ago and told me her story, she had successful implant reconstruciton on her breast that had rads. She said that it was not as soft and pliable as her other reconstructed breast that did not have rads, but that they both looked good to the naked eye and she was very happy. She has kindly offered to meet me, be a mentor to me and let me see her recontruction if I would like. I am definately going to take her up on it.

    I think that I have come to the decision to try this, hope there are no problems and if there are, go to plan b at that time. Trying to find the perfect reconstruction method for me is taking its toll. At the same time there were only 1mm margins on what they took out and I am worried about taking the time to start this process all over again, I just want to know that all the cancer is out.

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  • smerf
    smerf Member Posts: 615
    edited January 2009

    Sorry I am so slow to answer, but I haven't had a chance to check in with my family here for the holidays. Kids and DH really tie up the computer, but I was happy to have them. All have gone home, and I'm putting the house back in order, or what passes as order.

    I was recalled for more mammogram views. Each time the doc thought he saw "something" and wanted to do further checking. It takes an emotional toll, because every time I know I could be starting all over again, with a recurrence or a new primary in the breast. This has happened on both breasts at different times, and if I had had a mastectomy there would be no more mammos! For me, I think that would have been a good thing, but not for everyone. I was dx at age 60, and maybe would have felt differently when I was younger.

    I'm with you...I just want to know the cancer is out! I also had a 1mm margin, and that was the fascia and was removed at the time of surgery. That's why I would have needed rads even with a mastectomy. Tumor too close to the chest wall.

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  • Lynne3times
    Lynne3times Member Posts: 53
    edited January 2009

    Smerf,

    I am so glad you had a nice holiday with your family.

    I guess my onc will figure out what remains to be done after the blm, since I can't have anymore rads, hopefully they will clear the rest of those margins during the blm and the path reports will come out good.

    I completely understand about getting recalled for mammo's etc. it is the worst! happened to me a few times over the last 18 years but until this last one never turned out to be a problem except for the anxiety it caused.

    Good luck and thanks for posting back. Lynne

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