Friends? What friends??

HUGS TO ALL OF US....BIG BIG BIG HUGS!!!

KOSH

I have to say that I too was disappointed by the abscence of some people whom I thought loved me during my treatment. I did call one and asked her what happened and she said" I thought you were so busy and your family would be there that I should wait" then she said " okay I took too long and I am sorry" I think people don't want to take time out of their lives to deal with sick people. My husband didn't come to Omaha (and he could have) for my surgery and he thinks he did alot by buying me a plane ticket home " so you could be with your family" he was absent through all my treatment and never really wants to talk about it, so I come here. I know a woman who had a double mast. 12 years ago and she say's you have best friends and breast friends...

Well, when i was dx not one of my 4 brothers and only 2 of my sisters called me at all......I havent seen my brothers or talked to them in years...The last time I saw my oldest brother I hardly spoke to him because he is like a stranger to me.....I have 3 sister who I keep in constan cpontact and 2 sister I hardly ever speak to............I am the youngest of  13...there are only 9 of us left.....but we are not close....All of my close freinds disappeared too after my dx....i got NO help from family or friends during my recovery except for 2 days when 2 of my out of state sisters came down fo 2 days after my surgery.......Mt hubby was not much help ...He never did  houswork or anything....He even didnt  want to take time off to stay woth me the first week after surgery..He got his psychotic sister to stay with me...yea right no help there..she spent most of her time outside smoking...and when my daughter needed to be picked up from school because she was sick my dh got pissed because I got his sister to go pick her up...Like I could do it and didnt need her to do it ........i tell you I have come closer to divorcing this ditwad dh in the last yr than ever before......If I had soemwhere to go...but then again  friends and family abandonment...you have nowhere to go..........Even co workers who live in my neighborhood didnt even stop by on their way home form work to check up on me...i actually had total strangers come to my house with food and to help me...They were customers from the store I work for.....I have new friends in them.....Now when I meet someone newly dx i ask what can I do and when...and what do you like to eat?...I'll bring it by......i call a couple of my bc sisters in the area and check up on them every week or every other week.....I dont want anyone I know with bc or any illness to feel abandoned the way I did......Great Big Hugs to you all!!!!!!............Lucy

I have not told any co-workers, parents, neighbors etc... Friend who is an Oncologist nurse has been useless...except for saying "please don't die" and telling me stories of shopping for $80 bras. Another friend invited me to shop for underwear 24 hours after surgery and constantly whines about her problems, and that she had a friend who had a lumpectomy and radiation and it "was nothing, breezed right thru"which reminds me of the post "shut the f____ up". I needed to vent after lurking for 4 months. I appreciate all of the educational posts. My sister and husband have been wonderful though, on a positive note.