I need reassurance please...

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Some days I feel optimistic about treatments etc but on other days I feel as though my times up and that there's no hope. I'm sorry to sound so pessimistic but I keep asking myself and anyone else "Can I be cured? Is it treatable?" I feel so frightened as though this whole thing is taking over me. Please help.

Comments

  • Sassa
    Sassa Member Posts: 1,588
    edited September 2008

    Lynette,

    The way you feel is totally normal.  As time goes by, you will have more good days than bad ones.

     However, if you feel that the depression/anxiety  is taking you over, many women on here will tell you they asked for an anti-anxiety Rx.

    Hopefully, someone who has experience in that area will be along to tell you what they did.

  • Sassa
    Sassa Member Posts: 1,588
    edited September 2008

    I just saw this thread down the page about anti-anexity meds.

      http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/69/topic/720447

  • spar2
    spar2 Member Posts: 6,827
    edited September 2008

    Lynette, hang in there, remember this to shall pass.  Keep coming to us on this board and venting, we will always be here for you.  gentle hugs.

  • emath
    emath Member Posts: 92
    edited September 2008

    Lynette,

    It does get better. I was dx 7/07/08, I have already had a lumpectomy with SNB and finished my rads. I am about to start Tamoxifen next week. I was numb for the first two weeks, then I was at the doctors everyday and at that point feeling how tired I was and fed up with sitting and waiting. Feeling sorry for yourself is normal. I still have those days, I will spend about 1-2 hours down, then I snap out of it and tell myself that I need to look at all the things I am Thankful for in my life. No....having BC is not a blessing, but my children, grandchildren, husband, parents and pets are all blessing and I am Thankful for them in my life. I probally would not be so positive if not for them. It's ok....to fear. Just remember that fear is a darkroom full of negatives! So, don't stay there too long! (((((((((((((((Hugs))))))))))))))))))) to you. Come back often. We all here love the company!    Laughing

  • GoodMommy
    GoodMommy Member Posts: 294
    edited September 2008

    Lynette,

     This too shall pass.  I was diagnosed in March of 2005, what was at first thought to be a pre-cancerous area turned out to be a 1.6 cm, Grade 3 which had spread to 15 of 20 nodes.  The mass could not be felt because it was so close to the chest wall and my breasts were large and very dense.  My docs treated me very aggressively, I had bi-lateral mastectomy, 6 treatments with TAC and 34 rads.  I feel great and even though I might be a little naive, I feel cured.  Life gets back to a new normal.  The way I look at it is that I don't have a doctor's appointment today, so I can't get any bad news.  Keep your chin up.  You are fighting a war; but you can and will win.  Fill your life with people you care about and people that care about you.  Come to the Boards often when you need a little support.  The ladies here are wonderful and will help you with your journey.

     God bless,

    Chris

  • easyquilts
    easyquilts Member Posts: 876
    edited September 2008

    Lynette...The other ladies are right...This too shall pass, and you will gradually feel better about what is happening. 

    I was a total wreck the first couple of weeks, but once I had a plan of action..a lumpectomy and rads...I calmed down a lot.  

    Anxiety and depression..and worry...are so normal.  We have all experienced those things and mre.  However, if your depression deepens, or lingers for a long time, you should see your doctor abot some good meds.  My PCP put me on Lexapro to treat my "situational anxiety"...I don't plan to stay on it forever, but it has been a blessing.

    Come here as often as you like...The gals here are the best...No joke.  You can tell the truth here about how you are REALLY feeling, and no one will judge you....

    God Bless,

    Sandy

  • pattyinarnold
    pattyinarnold Member Posts: 39
    edited September 2008

    Lynette,

    I have had bc twice, the first time was invasive, with lumpectomy, did chemo and rads.  Second was dcis did bilateral mass.  I freaked out each time.  Take a deep breathe and lean on us.  As they said above you have friends here who will listen and try to help.  You at least have a place to vent.  Your not alone..

    pattyinarnold

  • Lynette
    Lynette Member Posts: 167
    edited September 2008

    Thank you all so much for your kind words of encouragement and support. I am panicking because I keep thinking of and expecting the worst. I will see my consultant tomorrow and he'll give me a treatment plan. Thank you all again so much.

  • onwardandforward
    onwardandforward Member Posts: 32
    edited September 2008

    THIS IS VERY DO-ABLE!  I had lumpectomy/SNB in April then spent my summer with chemo (AC-T).  I'm now celebrating finishing chemo.  I've continued to work through out -- just took days off right after chemo.  My best recommendation for chemo is to have a friend come with you each session -- we tried to make each like a little party...it made the whole process go much more quickly.  Next up for me is radiation so I figure I'm in the home stretch.

    Just remember that LOTS of women have gone through this and continue to do so, so your doctors are not reinventing the wheel....there is a lot of experience in treating breast cancer.  My best recommendation. 

    Lots of luck!

  • Shirlann
    Shirlann Member Posts: 3,302
    edited September 2008

    Honey, about 80% of us get well.  One heck of a lot better than heart disease!  So be encouraged.  I am 10 years post treatment, I met a lady at the dog park who had BC in 1985 and told me she often forgets which side it was on.

    When I told my bible class of about 20 women, 3 piped up and one was 22 years post treatment, one 17 and one 11.  All are well and doing fine today.  And my topper, my mom's best friend had a double mastectomy 50 years ago, she just died of old age, playing contract bridge and living and caring for herself, in her own home at 94.  People just don't talk about it.  You would be totally amazed at the numbers of us out here.  All the women I started on this site with 7 years ago are long gone, living their lives, working, everyone of the 8 to 12 I considered best friends are just fine.

    So get on some anti-deps for a year or two, until you can trust your body again, and then you can sloowly get off them, they are not addictive, but you have to wean off them.  They do not make you dopey or sleepy and take 3 to 6 weeks to work.  You think, "hm, nothing is happening", then one day, you find yourself humming.  The anit-deps just knit up the raveled sleeve of care......

    Gentle hugs, Shirlann

  • HeatherBLocklear
    HeatherBLocklear Member Posts: 1,370
    edited September 2008

    Well said, dear Shakespeare! At my mother's hair salon, the ladies have been talking about all the many women they've known who have had BC, survived, and now are leading their lives. They are legion. We will be among them too!

    Love to all,

    Annie Camel Hair

  • wishiwere
    wishiwere Member Posts: 3,793
    edited September 2008

    Lynette?  Have you had surgery yet?  I know my surgeon gave me 10 xanax to get through the testing and waiting and believe me!  IT helped. I still have one sitting in a bottle.  I know I have it there and figure IF I need it, it's there, but it's much easier now, after tx to get through the test and follow up.  You'll get here too lady. Just hand tight and hold our hands when you need! We're here! Keeping you in good thoughts!

  • Katie2u
    Katie2u Member Posts: 109
    edited September 2008

    Hi everyone:

        I am feeling a bit overwhelmed.  My OncoDX came back with a score of 30.  I'm going to start chemo next week.  I had a double mastectomy the 30th of July for IDC, 1.1 cm, Node negative, ER+ 100%, PR+ 5%, HER-2 negative, Stage 1, Grade 3.   Does anyone know of these longer term survivors who had a high OncoDX score?  Feeling like a Xanax myself right now.  ;)

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