"there's nothing more we can do"

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zakkles23
zakkles23 Member Posts: 5
edited June 2014 in Caring for Someone with Breast cancer

I posted once on here a few months ago when I found out my mom's bc had spread to her other side. Well, I'm back because now the doctors are saying there's nothing more they can do... They've already tried every treatment available and nothing works for her. They told her that normally you'd have 18 months after being diagnosed with such aggressive cancer. She was diagnosed over 5 years ago.

 What do I do?!?!

 My mom is being so strong and full of faith about it and is convinced that God will heal her. I hate to admit it, but I'm worried that God won't... that maybe God is just something that was made up to keep us in line or give us false hope. I feel like I can't even pray anymore because I don't know who I'm supposed to be praying to or what to say... After years of trying to have faith I can't help but wonder if it's all in vain.

 Trusting in God has helped my mom and dad tremendously throughout all of this, and for that I am thankful. But it scares me that their whole plan of action is now just to have God heal her. I want her to consider alternative medicine, ANYthing that will help, but I guess that goes against their religion or something? I just feel so helpless and lost.

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  • slonedeb
    slonedeb Member Posts: 562
    edited August 2008

    zak believe me god is real i went through the same felings about a month ago but i finally came to my senses and came back to prayer and god dont give up remember mircles still happen and have enough faith that your mom will recieve her mircle  god bless deb from ky

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  • Jacqueline34
    Jacqueline34 Member Posts: 2
    edited August 2008

    You know we all seem to test God's faith, but I want you to know that I am a living witness that God does have the last word no matter what. I am a 34 year old bc survivor. I was so scared and did not know what to do when I found out 6 months ago, but after completing  8 chemo treatments and a bilateral masectomy, I am doing just fine with no cancer found in breast or lymph nodes. I know it was God who removed the cancer and he is allowing me to be here much longer with my 2 year old daughter. One thing I have learned is never to question God or your faith in him. I believe I am going through this to open my eyes and let me know it is time for change in my life. Just keep praying and God will work it all out and remember he never puts no more on us than we can bare.  

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  • Analemma
    Analemma Member Posts: 1,622
    edited August 2008

    There are many non-believers.  We don't count on a miracle from God to save us, and our cure rate is exactly the same as those who do.

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  • pbcc1
    pbcc1 Member Posts: 659
    edited August 2008

    Cure rates vary from institution to institution, from patient to patient, from doctor to doctor and from treatments to treatments. Studies have been done on all of the above, and are published to be read by the public.

    I doubt you can show me a study showing the exact cure rate of those that believe in God and those that may not. Everyone is entitled to their opinion, but to take hope from someone regardless of what they believe is a despicable act. Believe, or don't believe whatever you are comfortable with, but don't take hope from those that have some.

    Until you can prove what you are saying, you should keep negative comments to yourself. We are all walking a long, hard road and need no more negativity or fear than we already have.

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  • justamber
    justamber Member Posts: 5
    edited August 2008

    I've kind of felt the doubt that you are talking about with my mom. I started praying to God to please just heal her or take her. I just didn't want her to suffer. He is healing her. She is getting better.

    Read Pslams 103. It has alot of Gods promises and has brought me a lot of hope.

    Remember God is better than any doctor. The Bible says He is the same as He was then and He will always be the same. He healed in Bible days so He can heal now. He is the greatest Physician!! 

    If your mom doesn't get better and you are a beliver, you have to realize that God sometimes does things that we don't understand. One of the most remarkable gifts God has given us is free will. It's not that He doesnt want to be involved, its that we don't want Him to be. You have to believe that His will, will be done. Be confident that He has our best interest at heart. Jesus himself said on the cross "My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?" Find comfort in that. God had a bigger plan. God isn't the cause of suffering. He is the Solution. Suffering comes from the devil or the result of free will. Romans 8:28 reminds us that God can bring good from any situation.

     Sickness, suffering and even death are not easy to deal with. But for sure, it should not cause you to loose faith in God.

     I will pray for you and your mom. Keep your head up!! HAVE FAITH!

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  • Chris51jon
    Chris51jon Member Posts: 7
    edited September 2008

    Amen

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  • heatheready
    heatheready Member Posts: 10
    edited October 2008

    I can understand how you feel.. about 18 months ago my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer at age 45.... she beat the first round and was in remission for three months when it returned and spread to her liver.... I can't imagine being close with anyone like i was with my mother and i'm sure you feel the pain that i did when i found out... the thing is i prayed more in that first month after the diagnosis than i have my entire life... and when we knew that God wasn't going to answer our prayers i prayed for her not to suffer.... well, needless to say when you die of cancer you suffer... and we all watched it the last day of her life... it was the most terrible day of my life... but i can tell you one thing.. i still believe in God.... i still believe that he could have cured her if he wanted to... the simple way to deal with it is that he didn't want to.... God doesn't answer every prayer we have... and i also believe that maybe life here was never going to be worth it to my mother.. there is no way to fight breast cancer of the liver and i think in a way God did us a favor by taking her so quickly... i think that we all need to have faith... as my mother said just before she died," i'm dying i know i am.... but God is going to take care of me... i'm in his hands now."  If she could have so much faith while she was laying there dying then i think that we all could do it too... please don't loose yours... i think if your going to get through this at all it will be with God's help

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