I'm bitchy, I moan, I groan.....anyway.
Comments
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My goodness. Im home from work late and Im laughing so hard Im crying.
Another thing! IOm upset Im gonna have a headache tonight cause I just had 2 1/2 glasses of wine reading everyones posts.
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i think we should all throw our tv's out the window and shout we're not gonna take it anymore. i'm gonna drop mine on the nurse who took my blood pressure using my left arm.
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Hi Traci, You go girl! You are welcome here anytime to vent your frustrations. Where are you getting your treatment? I live in Tampa, and I go to Lee Moffitt Cancer Center. It is a wonderful place traci. Believe me, I have been there just like you. You please just keep this in mind. Take one step at a time. Try not to push yourself. And, take one day at a time. You will be fine. You can Email me or PM me here anytime sweetie. Take Care. And Rest.
Love,
Kaloni
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I love this thread! I plan to post my own bitchy comments when I have a couple of hours to sit here.
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OK this is just a start. My dh and I have been caring for his mom (alzheimer's) for the last 7 years - last of those in our home. Dh died suddenly Dec 5.
Now I have this f.....disease to deal with. Her only living child cannot help out with her because "we can't afford to feed her". Pleeeeease, she lives on peanut butter, Jumbo Jack cheeseburgers, and ham sandwiches. Her only living sibling (younger) cannot help out because "I'm redoing my house". Word for word actual excuses.
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OMG! Just when you think it couldn't get any worse!!! Man, my probs are nothing compared to some of you guys!
Beergirl, I'm sorry about your DH....that really sucks. If I new how to underline a word, I would underline really. And his mom's kids... Good grief.......
I can't type how that makes me feel on a public forum!Kaloni, are you part of the Tampa Bay group? If not, consider yourself invited. I haven't gone to meet them as much as I would have liked to PRIOR TO BEING BALD!!!! But, when I have gone, it has been fun. You'll have to email me though...cuz I will forget this in about 2 minutes!
Beth, I would buy some Avon from you but I can't afford it. I'm going to go to dental hygiene school though and when I get my $400/day job I will call you!!
Lisa...that freaking amazes me! I'm not saying it's not worth it or anything but man....I had no freaking idea they made that much money! Holy s*!t. I'm calling all my nieces right now!!
Hey...have you ever considered counseling? Some positions do not require higher education degrees (not saying you don't have one) and you can make some decent money doing it. Not $400 per day I don't think but still...at least the physical part of it will be tolerable.
gsg...I know I've told you this before....your signature cracks me up! When I went in for my hysterectomy...my chart was in a pink bag and they had a sign that took up half the door to my room that said BP on LEGS ONLY! However, every single time I go in for blood work at my Onc office, unless it's Jessica,....I have to stick my leg out cuz they don't read the freaking chart.
Nicki, We are laughing next to each other!! I was hoping that would happen.
:-) Traci
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Marsha...I forgot to comment on your post. (imagine that) That was FUNNY! I've had people say that to me too but your "WTF?" cracked me up!!
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I just needed to laugh and for some reason I came here. Of course some of it was hysterical and some not so hysterical. But, thanks for the laugh!
And yes, it sucks!
Shirley
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Gsg, that happened to me right after my mastectomy, I woke up and the cuff was on my left arm and I had a bracelet on. It shouldn't have surprised me though, right after surgery the nurse asked me if my belly hurt. I said no why, she said I need to check your incision on your stomach. I said I had a mastectomy why do you need to check my stomach???? Do you think they ever check a chart before they work on you??
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My turn......I just finished my 4th and final round of Taxotere on 3/11/08. Was supposed to have it last week but my onc was worried about the edema and possible heart failure. I have gained 20 lbs in 9 weeks. Mostly in my upper torso. I also had some weight gain from the steroids and eating only ice cream when my taste buds bit the dust. My MUGA was ok so that is one worry off my mind.
So now with my double mast, my chest is scarred and caved in which extends out to a big flabby belly. I had a heart scan Monday and when I lay on the table the male tech asked me if I was wearing prostheses when he was putting on the leads. I told him yes and he was going to get me a sheet to cover me while I removed them. I just shoved my hand down my shirt, grabbed them and said "here". He turned red and I told him, after you saw my belly, I no longer have any modesty. None of my clothes fit so I live in sweats. I have not been able to exercise regulary since October though I have really tried. I cannot raise my arms above my head because they are so tight. Then when flossing a front crown popped off on a Friday night, so now I have a missing front tooth! Can I look any worse. Luckily the dentist got it fixed Monday.
I lost my hair, no biggie. But my eyelashes and eyebrows are another matter. My eyes just run tears from the Taxotere so no eye makeup. My feet are peeling and my ankles and lower legs are swollen so no sandles. Hope the weather stays cold for a long time.
Hot flashes, night sweats, no sleep with a Xanax at 10pm and 2 benedryl at 3am.
On Saturday, my husband's business partner of 25 years was found dead in his bed by his brother and only family member. Yes, I feel bad for his family but now the stress on my husband is through the roof. So I am trying to keep my complaining and bitchiness to a minimum and trying to support him.
And don't you love the people who enjoy telling you horror stories about cancer patients they knew? When I was just diagnosed and knew nothing except I had cancer, one woman told me about her friend who was diagnosed and dead all in 6 months! Thanks....I feel so much better now! my best friend (also a BC survivor-10 years) is going through sqamous cell of the larynx and taking radiation. The vet receptionist told her husband went through that and the radiation burned a hole in his neck and he threw up blood for 2 months. I was talking about reconstruction and get the story about the woman who began hers in 2006 and has been through 13 surgeries, an open hole that did not close for 6 weeks. Sheesh people do I look like I want more bad news? I want to ask, "have you had that mole on your face looked at? My friend had one and lost her nose to cancer"
On the other hand, I play the cancer card every chance I get. I no longer wear a wig but a ball cap. People let me cut in line. Especially with my eyes tearing they think I am crying and I get away with a lot in stores.
Whew, I think I feel a little better. Thanks for all the funny one liners. I plan on stealing and using them!
Debbie
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Boy do I hear you and feel your pain! I remember losing my hair and all of the other emotions that you have talked about. I am now almost a year out from treatment and post bilateral mastectomy. I find myself single at age 38 with two sons (who are truly my life). I am grateful for the gift of life that I have been given, but wonder if I will ever find myself dating again, or just in a physical relationship. I haven't dated since I was 17 years old and to start all over when under my clothes I feel like a freak! I am grateful, I don't mean to complain, but find that I am having an increasingly difficult time staying "positive".
You are right. It does feel good to get it out and to just complain every once in a while!!! :-)
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Beergirl,
Now I understand your screenname!!! Unbelievable....
Nothing much for me to bitch about today, but I've only been up for an hour and a half. LOL!
Oh, gsg? I would REPORT REPORT REPORT to the higher ups at the hospital about the bp cuff. LYMPHEDEMA is no fricking picnic. I never cease to be amazed at the ignorance of the "professionals" into whose hands we entrust our care!
((((HUGS))))
DianePS: Traci, I told my husband the mammo line last night and he said I should have screamed it at the b-word. He's not her biggest fan either! LOL!!!!!
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dhettish - that really sucks
1survivor - that really sucks
beergirl - that really sucks about your MIL's other kids, and I'm so sorry to hear about your DH
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Will read this whole thread later, looks like a great thread but I wanted to tell you Traci, why does your roommate's new guy think it's okay to smoke cigars in your house??????????? Or near it??? YUK!
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Hi 1survivor,
Are you not going to get reconstruction? Anyway I had bone cancer in my right jaw at 28. I had my jaw removed and partial reconstruction. I have no teeth or gums on my right side. To say the least I was singe and worried about dating. I did not date for 4 years.
I took scuba class and then found out the regulator kept falling out of my mouth. Anyway, with a specialized mouthpiece I worked it out, met my husband and we will be married 17 years in May. He had no problem with my jaw.
Now my husband actually hates fake breasts. He does not care if I get reconstruction or not. He just said please don't get them really big which I don't plan on since I lead (make that led) a very active life.
There are caring men out there. They aren't really hard to find. I found an activity I liked and met my husband there. I tell all my singe friends to do the same. Join a club or group and meet someone with common interests. That way you get to know each other. We are not freaks. We just look a little different. At least we can hide our surgeries under clothes. Think of the women who lose noses and parts of their face to cancer!
Take care. We have our down days and we just have to ride them out. Sometimes all I can do is just hang on. When my arms get tired, I call a girlfriend to help support me.
Debbie
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lol!!
I gotta be quick cuz I'm late after lunch...I'll check in more later. Like Shirley, just needed a laugh!
Rocktobermom, your Indian Name is hilarious!! LOL!
:-) Traci
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Geez! The latest posts are going to make me cry. But I'm glad you were able to get things off your chest (NO PUN INTENDED!).
My little gripe...I'm starting to miss my boob. I didn't have reconstruction and still won't..too much pain for me. And I'm worried that I'd make the LE worse. However, no one that doesn't know me can tell I'm wearing a fake boob. What are they called? Oh yes, prosthesis. Never in the world would I have thought I'd wear a prosthesis. To me prosthesis meant a leg or an arm, but not a boob.
My gripe for today is I JUST WANT TO FEEL NORMAL! I don't want to feel the doggy ear or the numbness under my arm. I want to put on my tops and not feel like something is too tight on THAT arm. I'm going to LE therapy, and it's better, but not good enough.
Now, isn't that a pitiful gripe? I'll answer for you. Yes!
You gals are tough! And your correct, Debbie, in saying that no one here is a freak.
Shirley
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Alright, I knew it wouldn't take long for me to come up with some "that sucks" moments....
So, a MONTH AGO, I find a computer online for my kids. The one we have is a true dinosaur and the new printer we bought them for Christmas won't even work for it. We are not heavy in the cash department, so I had to scrimp and save for this. So, I place the order with CIRCUIT CITY online and am promised the computer "sometime" between February 12 and February 29. Time passes...no computer. Finally get someone on the phone last Monday and she promised me a refund within 7-14 business days. That already bugs me because they took the money from my checking account within minutes of my order. Today, I get an email from CIRCUIT CITY corporate saying that my order has been cancelled and to wait 7-14 business days for my refund. GRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!! So, I email them back with all the pertinents and add that I am very dissatisfied with the service and the fact that they are holding my $$$ hostage. Leave for a while, come back and...........WHAM~I get ANOTHER email from corporate telling me the order I placed last week (um...WTF????) has been cancelled and the $$ will be refunded in yet ANOTHER 7-14 business days. I give. All I could think of was to reply with, "Gee, thanks for reminding me why I am complaining and why I will tell all my friends that CIRCUIT CITY customer service is sorely lacking." FYI: "sorely lacking" is a phrase I use frequently when I am thinking SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And, the cherry on the cake of my day? After picking the kids up from school and running a couple of errands, I decide to spend $$ I don't really have (thanks CIRCUIT CITY) to buy supper because I'm beat. We WRITE DOWN the order and my boys go into the restaurant to place the order and wait for it. So, we make the 30 minute drive home and I'm just wanting to get everyone fed and chill out for the night....little one's dinner (to the tune of 10 bucks!) is NOT in the bags! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR I do not have the time, energy (or gas $$) to make an extra trip back to the stinkin' place to get what we ordered IN WRITING in the first place!!!!
Can we all just hold hands and scream, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"???
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It's awesome how everybody still has a sense of humor! Debbie "(make that led)" LOL!!! You go girl.
Shirley...man do I know how you feel about wanting to feel normal. Deep sigh......
Diane....it freaks me out that you have kids.
Don't know why...lol!!.....I bet they are FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hugs girl!! I gotta go to my mom's. (Really) Be back later!
Traci
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LOL Traci! That's ok....freaks me out too. And, yep, they're a barrel of laughs!
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I just love you girls. Today I went to pre-op registration at hospital. When I got home, my deaf, schizophrenic bipolar son has decided he is having same problems he had that landed him in psych hospital 20 years ago. That happened again 19 years ago. I told him it is ok if he decided to be sick. I cannot take care of him now. Little background - he lives alone in his own apartment but meds dropped his bp, he fell, broke ankle, surgery, dh died 12 hours later. My son got out of the hospital the day before the funeral. Honest to God, if I didn't live this life, i would swear it was all a lie. Thanks for starting this thread Traci. I think I'll have a beer now.
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dhettish said: "None of my clothes fit so I live in sweats. I have not been able to exercise regulary since October though I have really tried. I cannot raise my arms above my head because they are so tight. Then when flossing a front crown popped off on a Friday night, so now I have a missing front tooth! Can I look any worse"
and she said, "I was talking about reconstruction and get the story about the woman who began hers in 2006 and has been through 13 surgeries, an open hole that did not close for 6 weeks. Sheesh people do I look like I want more bad news? I want to ask, "have you had that mole on your face looked at? My friend had one and lost her nose to cancer"
That sucks! But now I have to go get a papertowel and wipe the tea off the monitor!!!!!!!!!
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"youlooklikeyouneedabeergirl", damn GF you need more than a beer. I hope your life turns around and can sit back and enjoy that beer.
Great thread, Traci. I love your all senses of humor. This past summer I could've totally added to this, don't want to jinx things and talk about them now.
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OK....I'll chime in....
Cancer sucks
Mets sucks
Starting chemo again sucks
breaking into tears at the drop of a fricking hat sucks
trying to be brave sucks
being afraid sucks
most of all statistics SUCK! I refuse to pay any fricking attention to ANY more stats!
Oh, and how about the "pity face" that so many people make when they hear my cancer is back. I swear they are not happy until I cry.
Whew...that felt good
I think I have prayed and cussed in about equal measure in the last couple of weeks.....I certainly hope that God has a sense of humor....Thanks for a great thread
Deb C
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F*^$ CANCER!! I will never give you that pity face ever, DEB. Only the "you're f-ing beautiful" and "you can do this, girl" faces!!!
How about a "take a breath" face? I bet that you haven't exhaled for awhile. Would a beer help just for a moment?? Sending a nice cold one right now..
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A toast to all of us my friend
I'll take that beer....maybe 2 Hugs
Deb C
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Here Ya go Deb, and I will be back later!!
Got a lot to Bish about!!
Puppy (I love this place)
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OK...someone else better grab a cold one or I'm going to be doing my first chemo tomorrow with a virtual hang-over!
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Alaska Deb,
I will drink all those beers for you so you can be sober for chemo. The things I will do for my friends.
Watson
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Watson,
You crack me up!!!!!!
Cherryl
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